Depressed and hopeless

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nancymarie

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I need some prayers right now.

I’ve been here before posting about my marriage - long and verbally , sometimes physically abusive 37 years. No children. I had a nervous breakdown and separated from him in 2010.

He has advanced multiple sclerosis and it’s starting to cause him more and more problems. Even through the separation I’ve tried to be there, getting him medication, scheduling dr appts, visiting weekly and calling almost every day. He has never through all our problems, ,wanted marriage counseling so I have had to get counseling alone.

He still lives in our home ( has a live-in aide) and I bounce between friends and my mom’s house, but that is getting harder and harder as she lives 5 hours away and I’m dealing with panic attacks related to driving alone.

I’ve never had much peace about separating from an ill spouse and fear every day that God is angry, or that my husband will die on account of me. I know my leaving has caused him to suffer.

I feel God’s will is for me to return to the marriage and be with my husband until either one of us dies. My fear is dealing with his sickness and decline alone. Emotionally alone.
Whatever his personality issues are, they’ve always prevented him from being truly loving and connected to me.

I’m 60 now and though in fairly good health physically, mentally I’m a mess and suffering from PTSD from the years of being neglected and mistreated in my marriage. Also guilt that I made so many poor decisions and did not seek help when I was younger. I kept so much hidden from my family.

I only have brothers and they don’t want to be bothered with my problems. And my cousin (who is like a sister, is not in great health and lives 6 hours away).

I feel very afraid for my future and am in constant grief watching ms destroy my husband. It’s been almost 20 years that he’s had this awful disease. I am not heartless and still care, despite the abuse.

Please pray for me in my fear and please pray for my husband. I feel there is no hope for the future.

thank you and God Bless.
 
I need some prayers right now.

I’ve been here before posting about my marriage - long and verbally , sometimes physically abusive 37 years. No children. I had a nervous breakdown and separated from him in 2010.

He has advanced multiple sclerosis and it’s starting to cause him more and more problems. Even through the separation I’ve tried to be there, getting him medication, scheduling dr appts, visiting weekly and calling almost every day. He has never through all our problems, ,wanted marriage counseling so I have had to get counseling alone.

He still lives in our home ( has a live-in aide) and I bounce between friends and my mom’s house, but that is getting harder and harder as she lives 5 hours away and I’m dealing with panic attacks related to driving alone.

I’ve never had much peace about separating from an ill spouse and fear every day that God is angry, or that my husband will die on account of me. I know my leaving has caused him to suffer.

I feel God’s will is for me to return to the marriage and be with my husband until either one of us dies. My fear is dealing with his sickness and decline alone. Emotionally alone.
Whatever his personality issues are, they’ve always prevented him from being truly loving and connected to me.

I’m 60 now and though in fairly good health physically, mentally I’m a mess and suffering from PTSD from the years of being neglected and mistreated in my marriage. Also guilt that I made so many poor decisions and did not seek help when I was younger. I kept so much hidden from my family.

I only have brothers and they don’t want to be bothered with my problems. And my cousin (who is like a sister, is not in great health and lives 6 hours away).

I feel very afraid for my future and am in constant grief watching ms destroy my husband. It’s been almost 20 years that he’s had this awful disease. I am not heartless and still care, despite the abuse.

Please pray for me in my fear and please pray for my husband. I feel there is no hope for the future.

thank you and God Bless.
Wish you could leave that relationship even though he depends on you. I wish you had left the relationship when the abuse had started. It might have been easier that way, but that’s water under the bridge, now.

That’s unfortunate about his illness, but if you don’t take care of yourself, who will? He certainly isn’t going to. .
 
My prayers to you.

Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle. Be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may god rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God, thrust into hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.



Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.



Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

 
Praying for you. May God give you the strength to endure and persevere. God bless you.
 
“The Lord is at hand. Have no anxiety about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will keep your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” - Philippians 4: 6-7

You are in my prayers.
 
Hear, O Lord my prayer:
Give ear to my supplication in Thy truth:
Hear me in Thy justice.
Make the way known to me,
Wherein I should walk:
For I have lifted up my soul to Thee.
Amen
 
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