Designated Driver

[tonild]

My co-workers like to go out partying. I have been invited to go out with them. I don,t drink myself so I have offered to be a driver. Some of these co-workes are under age I know they drink too much as they often come to work hung over. I am 20 years older then some of them. I have told them I would not buy for them, but if they need I will drive them home. So wold it be wrong for me to go with them to offer them a safe way home?

 

[GEddie]

My co-workers like to go out partying. I have been invited to go out with them. I don,t drink myself so I have offered to be a driver. Some of these co-workes are under age I know they drink too much as they often come to work hung over. I am 20 years older then some of them. I have told them I would not buy for them, but if they need I will drive them home. So wold it be wrong for me to go with them to offer them a safe way home?

I don’t see how it could be wrong, provided you don’t buy drinks for them; having a designated driver might be the difference between a safe night out and a wreck.

ICXC NIKA

 

[Dakota_Roberts]

My co-workers like to go out partying. I have been invited to go out with them. I don,t drink myself so I have offered to be a driver. Some of these co-workes are under age I know they drink too much as they often come to work hung over. I am 20 years older then some of them. I have told them I would not buy for them, but if they need I will drive them home. So wold it be wrong for me to go with them to offer them a safe way home?

It is not morally wrong for you to do that as it reduces the chance of fatalities substantially (and they aren’t getting intentionally drunk are they?)

 

[Richard320]

My co-workers like to go out partying. I have been invited to go out with them. I don,t drink myself so I have offered to be a driver. Some of these co-workes are under age I know they drink too much as they often come to work hung over. I am 20 years older then some of them. I have told them I would not buy for them, but if they need I will drive them home. So wold it be wrong for me to go with them to offer them a safe way home?

Morally good, legally bad.

If they’re underage and drunk, and have open bottles, and you’re the only one over 21, you could get charged with Contributing to the Delinquency of a Minor. Really. Cops frequently bust frat house officers with that charge when a party gets out of hand.

If you do haul them around, make sure there’s no booze in the car.

 

[tonild]

It is not morally wrong for you to do that as it reduces the chance of fatalities substantially (and they aren’t getting intentionally drunk are they?)

acctually I think they are. They are in the young and stupid part of there lives. 18, 19,20+
I tell them that what they do is not good for them. But I am not there parent. I at lest want to be sure they get home alive.

 

[GEddie]

Morally good, legally bad.

If they’re underage and drunk, and have open bottles, and you’re the only one over 21, you could get charged with Contributing to the Delinquency of a Minor. Really. Cops frequently bust frat house officers with that charge when a party gets out of hand.

If you do haul them around, make sure there’s no booze in the car.

In some states (including this one), open booze in cars is illegal regardless of the ages involved. Be careful.

ICXC NIKA

 

[tonild]

In some states (including this one), open booze in cars is illegal regardless of the ages involved. Be careful.

ICXC NIKA

the drinking is done in a persons home. So It isn’t in the car. But they do drink to excess.

 

[Edmundus1581]

It is not inherently sinful to drink more than the legal BAC, but it is sinful (and dangerous) to drive in that condition, so that is the harm you averting. ie. Your primary intention is to prevent a morally neutral activity (some level of intoxication) from becoming sinful and dangerous (driving UI). If they abuse your help by drinking in excess, then that’s their choice - your original intention is still sound.

It is not like a safe “shooting up” room for addicts, where you are enabling something which is inherently sinful (although many on-the-street Catholic workers are sympathetic to that also).

 

[Rainaldo]

My co-workers like to go out partying. I have been invited to go out with them. I don,t drink myself so I have offered to be a driver. Some of these co-workes are under age I know they drink too much as they often come to work hung over. I am 20 years older then some of them. I have told them I would not buy for them, but if they need I will drive them home. So wold it be wrong for me to go with them to offer them a safe way home?

In my opinion it is best not to offer to be designated driver, for two reasons. First, they will come to rely on you to babysit them and you will be trapped by your own guilt until you get up the gumption to put your foot down and say no; second, it is their responsibility to arrange for their own safety if they want to go out and get stoopid drunk.

Besides, that’s what cabs are for, and cabbies know this. That’s why they lurk outside major bars at closing time. It’s a guaranteed fare.

I’ve done a little good-samaritan DD work, and after putting up with drunk people and their immature, irresponsible, self-incapacitating behavior (and vomit), I eventually decided that if you are going to live that sort of lifestyle then you need to learn how to manage it yourself without relying on other people to save you all the time.

So I suggest withdrawing your offer to be designated babysitter - give them an excuse that “something suddenly came up” and you will have to leave early - and get yourself to and from the party independently and alone.

And if you feel guilty for not preventing an alcohol-related tragedy, think about this: if there was someone to babysit them consistently (like you, for example), then the day will still come anyway - it always comes eventually - when after years of being consistently saved from themselves by guilt-motivated do-gooders, there will be no one to babysit them, because everyone will be tired of saving them from themselves. Then the alcohol-related tragedies will happen, and there will be nothing anyone can do about it. So whether you “help” them or not, the tragedies are still going to happen.