There’s hardly any such thing as alimony these days. Child support still gets enforced but that depends on the state laws and if this bum tries to say he’s taken some kind of poverty vow or whatever, well, it’s not easy to get any money from deadbeat dads.Actually, I agree and this is good advice. He may be creating a narrative to garner an annulment and get a “no-fault” divorce with 50/50 custody, especially if he can somehow finagle HER into filing the papers for divorce. That route would make it harder for her to collect alimony and/or child support. Everything he’s saying is right in line with a script for trying to get an annulment… but it’s not playing out right because he’s OBVIOUSLY not really interested in being a priest and has no idea what it entails if he thinks it’s about being alone. The late night texts are still a problem as well.
Yes, a private investigator to gather evidence of impropriety would be a very good defensive measure for this mother to take, so that she has the freedom to pursue separation if need be and to ensure that her child goes to the adult with the proven moral track record and has the proper support from the father.
Well where is the OP’s dad? I’d say her dad could come and give the boy a good lesson.If you could beat sense into people there are several folks in my life I would have used as pinatas.
Unfortunately, you can’t. Your fists will hurt, you’ll be introuble, and they’ll still be foolish. .
Welcome to the world of no-fault divorce! The most disgusting thing to me is when the party wanting the divorce is the lower income spouse and has committed adultery, emptied the bank accounts etc.; and THEN asks for alimony in an amount to support them in the lifestyle to which they have become accustomed to during the marriage. Huh?? They want the financial benefits of marriage, but not the obligations? And the courts go along with this?Am I the only one who thinks vows publicly made should be honoured by society in a way that some kind of punishment was in place when people cheated and deceived in this manner… It doesn’t make any sense.
If people cheat in business they go to prison or pay a fine… If people destroy other peoples lives by this kind of marital deception, then there is no consequences…
Welcome to the world of no-fault divorce! The most disgusting thing to me is when the party wanting the divorce is the lower income spouse and has committed adultery, emptied the bank accounts etc.; and THEN asks for alimony in an amount to support them in the lifestyle to which they have become accustomed to during the marriage. Huh?? They want the financial benefits of marriage, but not the obligations? And the courts go along with this?
This is exactly how it works. And it sucks.
Honoring vows? Divorced, wife gone over 2 years and has been living with someone else. I’m still upholding my vows and the kids are living with me. So, no you aren’t the only one thinking vows and obligations should be honored. But as a society in the US we don’t hold people accountable, run your business into the ground, get a bailout from the government and a bonus etc. etc. Buy more house than you can afford? Blame the banks, ask the government for bailouts. Lend money to folks who can’t afford it? Get the government to bail you out. Go deeply in debt for a college degree which will only result in a low-paying job? Demand the government step in and wipeout your debt… and on and on.
We now subsidize stupidity and penalize prudence.
ETA: Violence only gets you jail time. In earlier times society understood that certain boundaries being crossed necessitated a brutal response, it did help reinforce acceptable behavior. Those times are passed. As a realist, getting oneself sent to jail, a police record, and probably a civil suit resulting in paying large amounts just isn’t smart.