DH is being reinstated to JWism...

[yessisan]

Unfortunately, that generalization isn’t entirely true.
In the county I live in now, there’s 1 Catholic church and 1 kingdom hall. Now we got them beat in the number of latino members but not nearly as much as you might expect. And I would expect if you take the current population (not including new births and recent arrivals) their % of attendance is increasing more than ours.

Also, I can’t speak directly about the country of Mexico because I’ve never been there but I have been to other Central American countries and have seen firsthand the growing prescence of kingdom halls.

I made this generalization since Mexico is a Catholic country. Sadly it’s losing many members of the CC, but most Mexican’s are Catholic. I am Mexican, and I’m Catholic. All of my family on both mom and dad’s sides are Catholic.

Where I lived in Mexico, it was strange to see a JW, or a person of a different religion other than Catholic. We had a population of 15,000 and there were about 5 parishes. Now there are 35,000 people and still no KH’s. There was only one Mexican Family in that town who wasn’t Catholic, and they were Jewish. Now I believe there are a few JWs but they have to travel about 30 minutes to get to the nearest KH.

Just remember that Mexico a few years ago was still 92% Catholic, I know the number is down, I think it’s 89%, but still, it’s weird to see a Mexican who isn’t Catholic, at least here in the US. Here, the first one I met after 13 yrs of living in the US was DH. Even at DH’s congregation, most are from South America, I think about 10 are Mexican, and they have about 120 members in the Spanish speaking one.

Where I lived for the past 7 yrs there are 2 KH’s but have 3 parishes. One is mostly for Latinos,but the other 2 still have Masses and minitries for Latinos. Where I live now there are 2 huge Parishes and 1 KH, but one is mainly for Latinos, and holds daily Masses in Spanish, and 3 on Sundays.

I just looked up how many JWs there are in Mexico compared to Catholics, andh here it is:

JWs: 1,057,736
Catholics: 74,612,373
Mexican population: 84,794,454

 

[SerenaHC]

Hi Serena, thanks again for writing here. I know I wasn’t aware of many things, but I knew enough of them when I married him…
Can I ask you what was it that led you to get out of the falsetower, and what made you look into the CC? Were you a convert from another religion to JWism? or were you a cradle JW?

God took me by the hand and led me out of the JWs and into his Church. It took a long time, but he finally got me Home! My conversion story is at the following url:
catholicxjw.com/marymagdalen.html
Now, I intend to update this to give more of the scriptural and theological reasons for my conversion, but this will do for now. I’m very happy in the Catholic Church.

I’ve always admired the Mexican Catholics I’ve known because they seem to have more of a reverence for Jesus and Mary and more appreciation for the riches of the Church than most (not all) American Catholics I’ve met. I hope the attitudes of the Mexican Catholics in the U.S. will rub off on their U.S. Catholic counterparts.

In Christ,

 

[lak611]

God took me by the hand and led me out of the JWs and into his Church. It took a long time, but he finally got me Home! My conversion story is at the following url:
catholicxjw.com/marymagdalen.html
Now, I intend to update this to give more of the scriptural and theological reasons for my conversion, but this will do for now. I’m very happy in the Catholic Church.

SerenaHC, what a beautiful conversion story! God Bless you and your husband.

 

[thomasf]

Hope you didn’t get me wrong, I’ve had JWs complaining here about things like that and started all nice and then got naughty, I said that just in case, nothing against you. Anywho, I was a practicing Catholic at the time, and still am. DH has never gone to Church w/me, he’s completely against it. He has taken me to confession but waits in the car.

We met at a friend’s house. I was invited to a babyshower, and she invited him so we could meet. Since he’s Mexican, I figured he was Catholic, so I didn’t ask about religion. You see, all the guys I dated were Catholic, so the idea of him not being Catholic didn’t even cross my mind. After I started feeling something for him, our “friend” told me to be careful because he was very religious. I didn’t think anything bad about it, so I told him she said this, and that’s when he told me he was a JW. Of the very few Mexicans you’ll ever meet who isn’t Catholic, I was surprised, scared, threatened… but that led me to do my Confirmation. We married and I started teaching Catechism and am attending a Catechist Institute.

Regarding the disfellowshipping and inactivity of JWs… being inactive is voluntary, however, this can bring consequences and if it’s too “extreme” they can be disfellowshipped. Disfellowshipped is when you have sinned and do not repent, or if you have committed the same sin more than once, or if you have gone against JW doctrine. My husband was DF’d because he was w/me, and because he was marrying me, a Catholic.

Hope that answers your questions.

Just curious, did you get married in the church? If so, did you have to do premarital counseling? And if so, did the priest address the differences in the religions between the two of you?

 

[Maria1212]

I think it is very important for us to support the OP, and not try to suggest, however indirectly, that she is responsible or somehow to blame. What matters at this point is where to from here.

She loves her husband, he loves her, and they have a loving marriage. Yes, religious faith is a big divider, but they still have a strong marriage.

Our OP has strong faith and this is the perfect opportunity for her to serve as a witness to her husband, and to his JW friends. The best example she can be, is to stay strong and firmly grounded in her prayer life. We can all support her by praying for her and her husband, and providing a welcoming place for her to share her frustrations, without feeling like she is being judged.

Through her example, the Holy Spirit may lead her husband to the Catholic Church. He is obviously seeking to grow closer to God, or he would not have been reinstated in the JW Church. This could be the beginning of a long journey home to the Catholic Church.

To our OP, live your faith proudly, and the Holy Spirit shine like a bright light to your husband. I think you are smart in that you do not want to upset your husband and have it backfire on you. But by staying strong, and with constant prayer, you will be a living Gospel to your husband.

We will keep you and your husband in our prayers.

Sincerely,

Maria

 

[VWcrazy]

I know it wouldn’t be possible, but I think yessian’s hubby needs to be in RCIA to learn what his wife’s religion is really about.

I know he wouldn’t go, but I think its the best thing he could possibly do. If his wife can go to the KH, conventions, etc with him, then he should be able to go RCIA.

He doesn’t need to convert, but he can learn what the CC teaches first-hand.

Also, I realize Yessian can try to teach him at home - but being in RCIA a psychological advantage.

 

[yessisan]

Just curious, did you get married in the church? If so, did you have to do premarital counseling? And if so, did the priest address the differences in the religions between the two of you?

We did and did not get married in the Church. I petitioned to the Bishop for a radical sanation which is a kind of convalidation, so no, we didn’t really have premarital counseling. I did, however, speak to several priests about it, including the Marriage Tribunal, and this didn’t seem to stop them from granting validity to my marriage, and because he was validly Baptized in the CC, it’s a Sacramental marriage.

I think it is very important for us to support the OP, and not try to suggest, however indirectly, that she is responsible or somehow to blame. What matters at this point is where to from here.

She loves her husband, he loves her, and they have a loving marriage. Yes, religious faith is a big divider, but they still have a strong marriage.

Our OP has strong faith and this is the perfect opportunity for her to serve as a witness to her husband, and to his JW friends. The best example she can be, is to stay strong and firmly grounded in her prayer life. We can all support her by praying for her and her husband, and providing a welcoming place for her to share her frustrations, without feeling like she is being judged.

Through her example, the Holy Spirit may lead her husband to the Catholic Church. He is obviously seeking to grow closer to God, or he would not have been reinstated in the JW Church. This could be the beginning of a long journey home to the Catholic Church.

To our OP, live your faith proudly, and the Holy Spirit shine like a bright light to your husband. I think you are smart in that you do not want to upset your husband and have it backfire on you. But by staying strong, and with constant prayer, you will be a living Gospel to your husband.

We will keep you and your husband in our prayers.

Sincerely,

Maria

Your words are very kind. Thank you for being here for me even though we don’t know each other. You are a great Christian!! Thanks for all your kindness.

I know it wouldn’t be possible, but I think yessian’s hubby needs to be in RCIA to learn what his wife’s religion is really about.

I know he wouldn’t go, but I think its the best thing he could possibly do. If his wife can go to the KH, conventions, etc with him, then he should be able to go RCIA.

He doesn’t need to convert, but he can learn what the CC teaches first-hand.

Also, I realize Yessian can try to teach him at home - but being in RCIA a psychological advantage.

DH cannot and wouldn’t if he could, attend RCIA classes, a priest also told me he cannot attend RCIA. He has already been Baptized, done his First Communion and has been Confirmed in the Catholic faith. He was a kid when this whole JW thing was introduced to his mom and 3 of 4 sisters. I’ve explained it many times before but you may not have known that. Plus, I already asked him to go to Mass w/me and refuses. I have also brought up the fact that I have gone w/him to his things, and that he should do the same for me, but he loves his JWism more than me (to his eyes, he loves God more than me, but I understand his POV), he thinks he’d be offending God by entering a Catholic Church.

DH believes he knows all he needs to know about Catholicism. He “learned” it all from the JWs, he was too young to remember what he learned in catechism.

 

[yessisan]

God took me by the hand and led me out of the JWs and into his Church. It took a long time, but he finally got me Home! My conversion story is at the following url:
catholicxjw.com/marymagdalen.html
Now, I intend to update this to give more of the scriptural and theological reasons for my conversion, but this will do for now. I’m very happy in the Catholic Church.

I’ve always admired the Mexican Catholics I’ve known because they seem to have more of a reverence for Jesus and Mary and more appreciation for the riches of the Church than most (not all) American Catholics I’ve met. I hope the attitudes of the Mexican Catholics in the U.S. will rub off on their U.S. Catholic counterparts.

In Christ,

I loved the your story!! Thanks about the Mexican Catholic comment. We are very passionate (in a good way) about our faith. We love God, we love Jesus, we love Mary and all the Saints, but I think some take it to the very extreme, which can be bad at times.

 

[Fate]

I read some of the thread and felt a need to respond. I will give a little background here. I was born and raised inside the JW religion, with members or family friends at nearly all levels over time, and with the same family being in the religion since before the mid 1900’s. I also am a member on several ex-JW boards where my role has slowly transitioned from someone getting support, to someone providing support in leaving.

In leaving I had the support and friendship of a good friend - who is currently a Catholic seminarian. He was a major influence in my leaving - but not THE influence. And that’s something everyone needs to remember. The process of leaving, of conversion, must be accomplished by the individual converting. There is no magic pill, no string of words, no scripted conversation that will result in this man walking away from the JWs.

I’ve seen it reflected in some of the advice here both ways, but you must remember - any attempt to preach, stop him from going to meetings, stop him from going in field service, stop him from studying, not obey the “marital arrangement” by acting like an obediant dog - all of that - he will view as proof of his faith and as coming from Satan himself.

The most effective tool for defeating JWIsm? Love. Save your money on the ‘how to talk to a JW’ books. Show this man love and respect his beliefs. Show him what it means to be a Christian. Let him see that the world and those that are not JWs are not what the JW church makes it out to be. Continue to be a good Catholic. Do not press him on returning to Catholicism directly.

It might help to become active with an ex-JW group, especially one for Catholics. I think I already saw the catholicxjw group posted. There are a few books about talking to JWs that are worthwile. It is good to know what they believe and how to show (not tell) why the religion is so damaging. The more effective approach is something Jesus himself used - questions. Do not make contradictory statements - ask good questions about what he believes. Often, a line of questioning will reveal only a surface knowledge that isn’t really satisfied by the society’s literature.

It is a hard, difficult path to go down to live with someone that is a JW. Any children involved will have some very tough issues with JW tactics on children and the way they already manipulate minds.

Realize that getting a person to leave the JWs, or to rewew a relationship with God, or to return to the Catholic church fully are all completely different goals. Most JWs leaving the organization have been so hurt by the experience that they have no desire to return to a church at all. Many become athiests or agnostics. A select few will become or return to a given religion. And to return to a religion they left for the JWs - is extremely rare.

I read earlier that you don’t know if your prayer is working. Do not fall into that trap. Prayer works and it is working for you now. Just realize that there is a lot going on here, and it could take time and not end the way you most desire it to, and further that there are real emotions and people with free will involved.

The most negative and sad thing about the JWs is how they work to distort and destroy love. It is not intentional, but it is what happens. If you work to keep real love there, the gap between what your husband hears as love and what he sees and feels will have a powerful effect - just realize, sadly, that it sometimes drives people away. This is not easy and I too will be praying for you, as I do all people going through these things.

 

[yessisan]

…

I read earlier that you don’t know if your prayer is working. Do not fall into that trap. Prayer works and it is working for you now. Just realize that there is a lot going on here, and it could take time and not end the way you most desire it to, and further that there are real emotions and people with free will involved.

The most negative and sad thing about the JWs is how they work to distort and destroy love. It is not intentional, but it is what happens. If you work to keep real love there, the gap between what your husband hears as love and what he sees and feels will have a powerful effect - just realize, sadly, that it sometimes drives people away. This is not easy and I too will be praying for you, as I do all people going through these things.

Thanks for your (name removed by moderator)ut. You know, you are right, any time I try to talk to him about what I think is wrong w/his religion it backfires and we end up having a heated argument. The last ones haven’t been so bad because I am limiting my comments and trying to make them productive or bring them up as questions. Friday I tried something new. I asked him why it is that when a divorce of a JW and a non-JW happens, that the children stay w/the JW parent. He asked me to give him an example and I told him Serena’s story, but he didn’t believe it, he said maybe she did something so the elders thought it was better if her son stayed w/the dad. I tried explaining to him that an ex-JW isn’t a bad person, but then he said if Serena’s story was true, she should’ve had gone to the authorities and that the elders cannot deal w/custody or rape or anything, that the court had to decide that. I think that’s just his opinion because I haven’t heard this from any other JW, I’ve heard similar stories to that of Serena’s, but the JW’s I’ve spoken to about them say exactly what Serena said. He was a bit upset so we dropped the subject. I’m hoping things like this make him see what’s wrong with the JWs.

One thing I heard at Mass yesterday was that the Pastor, during Homily, said that it is good to have doubts, it’s good to have questions, because that way you’ll try and find the answers and get a better understanding of your faith… I told DH this, I hope he really listens so he knows it IS ok to doubt. I think he’s just afraid to go against the falsetower’s teachings, like you mentioned, he probably thinks Satan is doing this through me… but hope one day it hits him. He knows I love him and that it isn’t going to change because he is a JW, I try my best to be a Christian example so he sees there is nothing wrong with being Catholic.

All I’m doing now is speak to ex-JWs who are now Catholic, and I learned all I could from the JWs so I know how their minds work. And I’m also praying so that he finds something wrong with the JW doctrine so he decides one day to leave, and maybe from there guide him to a Christian religion, maybe not the Catholic (which would be ideal if it were), but to show him the way to the Trinity. I’m praying the rosary every day, and every Mass I attend I dedicate it to him leaving the JWs and hope he finds his way to the CC. This seems to be the better approach, this has stopped the arguments and I feel more at peace.

You have great courage to have left the JWs. I know they are very persuasive and controlling. I hope you find your way to whatever you are looking for, and hope that one day you’ll see what God wants you to see (unless you have already found it).

Thanks for your prayers!!

 

[teajay]

What is DH?

 

[wanner47]

What is DH?

DH is an Internet acronym meaning “Dear Husband” or “D*** Husband”, depending on context. Most of the time it is “Dear Husband,” though.

 

[SuzieB]

Darling Husband or Dear Husband. I think. I’m not for sure what the D stands for.