Did girls get slapped during Confirmation, too?

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mommamaree said:
Who is making mountains out of molehills? The title says slapped, and I have never heard of any sort of slapping, ceremonial or otherwise. I was concerned that something like an actual slap was a possibility. That would be highly inappropriate.
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Common sense would tell one it’s not a real slap. How many parents do you think would stand for their kids getting whacked a good one. I was talking about those making it sound like a “good one” that was making mountains out of molehills. I never in my more than 70 years ever heard anyone complain about it and I taught CCD for 20 years and saw many Confirmations in my lifetime, been sponsor for quite a few, and don’t even remember noticing when the Bishop did it in the ceremony. God Bless, Memaw
 
marywarfield said:
Good heavens woman! Get a grip! You are lashing out at
everyone responding to your post.

I called it a slap because historically it has been called
a slap! It just was mea culpa!

Do you really believe someone in your Church is
going to back hand your kid without warning?

You have no way of knowing if I’m a cradle catholic
as I have no way of knowing you are a convert.

I gave you only the historical name and significance
of the action. That’s all.

I hope this is not indicative of your reaction when
learning more about the Church and I hope you
eventually learn to trust the Church more than
wondering if someone is going to hit your kids
or worrying about the scandal.

Wow. Chill.
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Which one of us needs to get a grip? Who is lashing out? Your posting history at CAF demonstrates a tendency toward ad hominem and exaggeration.
 
This reminds me of the last USCCB meeting where this came up. During the debate, a bishop mentioned that “you are a soldier for Christ” is actually the misunderstood meaning, because the act is supposed to be a “caress of peace.”

My own confirmation, I got a handshake from the bishop. My parents received a caress on their cheeks from the bishop.
 
janeway529 said:
This reminds me of the last USCCB meeting where this came up. During the debate, a bishop mentioned that “you are a soldier for Christ” is actually the misunderstood meaning, because the act is supposed to be a “caress of peace.”

My own confirmation, I got a handshake from the bishop. My parents received a caress on their cheeks from the bishop.
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That’s more like it and a beautiful way of putting it. God Bless, Memaw
 
mommamaree said:
Which one of us needs to get a grip? Who is lashing out? Your posting history at CAF demonstrates a tendency toward ad hominem and exaggeration.
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Ah bless you woman. I’m just one of those “cradle Catholics”
that don’t know better and get it wrong. Thank you for the correction.
Peace
 
I was confirmed in 1958, and yes, the bishop tapped us on the cheek, girls and boys both, no difference. We were certainly prepared for this, and were taught that this was to remind us the we were to be soldiers of Christ. Both men and women are to be soldiers of Christ, and I hope that after all these years I am a good one.
 
marywarfield said:
Ah bless you woman. I’m just one of those “cradle Catholics”
that don’t know better and get it wrong. Thank you for the correction.
Peace
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She always does this kind of stuff. Don’t worry about it.
 
[edited]

It calls to mind initiation rites of secret societies, cults, etc. and that is, to me, creepy. It might not be creepy to you or to others.
 
We had a discussion about this in my RCIA class. Our priest told how he had gotten the slap at age 7 (First Communion and Confirmation at the same time then?). He said his biggest fear was that he would answer the question wrong, or otherwise shame himself in front of his dad, who was there in all his Knights of Columbus regalia.
We ourselves were not slapped (6 years ago).
This was the norm up through Vatican II only, I believe?
 
VeritasLuxMea said:
It calls to mind initiation rites of secret societies, cults, etc. and that is, to me, creepy. It might not be creepy to you or to others.
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Does all the symbolism in the Church call to mind initiation rites of secret societies? Because our rituals are full of symbolism and symbolic gestures, though they are not at all secret. I just don’t get it.
 
mommamaree said:
I think cradle Catholics REALLY need to put themselves in the shoes of converts to the faith, who would not know what was happening or why, if they were hurt or humiliated in front of a Church full of strangers.
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Nobody said anyone was slapped/tapped without being told ahead of time, and how is it humiliating to have that happen in a church where the adults will logically have experienced the same thing? To me, someone putting dirt on my head and telling me I am dust is worse. But the fact that it’s true and that everyone else is being told the same thing help me through Ash Wednesday services. 🙂

Anyway you might want to examine the fact that as soon as you heard about the practice, you assumed the Bishop would slap children hard enough to hurt and not tell anyone first. Maybe you should try to assume the best rather than the worst? Then you can find out the truth without getting upset first. If it turns out that there is something wrong, there is plenty of time to get upset later, after you know the facts.
mommamaree said:
I have been slapped in the face, hard enough to rattle my teeth, so that is what I imagined, based upon the original post and title.
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Mere practical considerations should show that this is not possible. I’ve seen as many as 100 kids at a confirmation. If a bishop (or anyone) slapped 100 people that hard, he wouldn’t be leaving in his car, he’d be leaving in an ambulance, so they could put his hand (or what’s left of it) in a cast. But why on earth would you have imagined that first, anyway? Have you never been or seen anyone slapped with less force than that? Why would you automatically assume the worst?

–Jen
 
revert_jen said:
Nobody said anyone was slapped/tapped without being told ahead of time, and how is it humiliating to have that happen in a church where the adults will logically have experienced the same thing? To me, someone putting dirt on my head and telling me I am dust is worse. But the fact that it’s true and that everyone else is being told the same thing help me through Ash Wednesday services. 🙂

Anyway you might want to examine the fact that as soon as you heard about the practice, you assumed the Bishop would slap children hard enough to hurt and not tell anyone first. Maybe you should try to assume the best rather than the worst? Then you can find out the truth without getting upset first. If it turns out that there is something wrong, there is plenty of time to get upset later, after you know the facts.

Mere practical considerations should show that this is not possible. I’ve seen as many as 100 kids at a confirmation. If a bishop (or anyone) slapped 100 people that hard, he wouldn’t be leaving in his car, he’d be leaving in an ambulance, so they could put his hand (or what’s left of it) in a cast. But why on earth would you have imagined that first, anyway? Have you never been or seen anyone slapped with less force than that? Why would you automatically assume the worst?

–Jen
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I was not assuming the worst so much as really confused by the word slapped. My only experiences of being slapped were quite violent, and I have never heard of any other definition of slap. So that is why I said I was really curious to see what other people’s experiences were, so that I could understand the context. I was definitely reassured by several of the posts explaining that it was more of a tap, and that it was not a surprise. Remember I was one of the earliest respondents in the thread, so I did not have the benefit of the details of this practice. That is why I was asking questions.
 
I think we can all agree that the normal definition of “slap/slapped” is “to strike sharply with the hand.” There have been some historical practices in the Church (I’m thinking of my former OCD (not the personality disorder) days and the “discipline.”) which are totally foreign to our “modern sensibilities.” So, is it such a surprise that someone might see the title of this thread, have the thought that the word “slap” actually means “slap” and that there might have been a time when the Rite of Confirmation actually included a slap? I think we can cut “mommamaree” some slack.

I don’t know why it would ever be called a slap, since that is not what it is. As the reference to the old Baltimore Catechism and Encyclopedia shows, it was more properly referred to as a “slight blow.” Kids, in their usual colloquial manner, turned it into a “slap.”

Dan
 
I was Confirmed in 1962. Boys and girls both got a light slap, that we were taught was to impress on us that we became soldiers of Christ and were to always be ready to defend the faith. We were taught that we may even have to give our life if need be, and to never deny our faith.
 
My Mom told me that when she was little the older kids who had already been confirmed often told younger ones that the slap would be very hard and would probably knock them down.
 
Seamus_L said:
My Mom told me that when she was little the older kids who had already been confirmed often told younger ones that the slap would be very hard and would probably knock them down.
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That must have been when families had more that one child and the older ones would tell the younger ones stories to scare them… like Sister so and so with the ruler or the trip to the Principal’s office… anyway, the stories kept us on our toes so we knew how to behave!
 
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