Did I sin mortally by telling Darrell I wouldn't smoke and then going ahead and doing it?

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Holly3278

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I was at Darrell’s house this morning and he told me not to smoke. I told him ok. Well, then I went home and just now I asked Tim for a cigarette and he let me smoke some. Did I sin mortally?
 
I think most people would need more context. I’ll ask James.
 
Et_Cetera said:
I think most people would need more context. I’ll ask James.
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Well, what additional information do you need? He told me not to smoke because he doesn’t like me smoking because it makes me smell bad and because it’s bad for my health and I told him I wouldn’t but I did it anyway. Am I not guilty of the mortal sin of lying? 🤷:confused:
 
Who is Darrell? What duty/obligation do you have to him?

Also, is smoking a habit for you? Did you make at ATTEMPT to not smoke? According to CCC1735 *- Imputability and responsibility for an action can be diminished or even nullified by ignorance, inadvertence, duress, fear, habit, inordinate attachments, and other psychological or social factors.
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All of these elements factor into whether or not the sin was mortal.
 
I think it’s best to ere on the safe side. There’s also something to be said for confession veial sins too.
 
Sir_Knight said:
Who is Darrell? What duty/obligation do you have to him?

Also, is smoking a habit for you? Did you make at ATTEMPT to not smoke? According to CCC1735 *- Imputability and responsibility for an action can be diminished or even nullified by ignorance, inadvertence, duress, fear, habit, inordinate attachments, and other psychological or social factors.
*
All of these elements factor into whether or not the sin was mortal.
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Darrell is my boyfriend. Also, I feel like I am addicted to the cigarettes.
 
You have no FORMAL commitment to a boyfriend as you would to a husband. So, that right there, lessens the seriousness of the offense and the fact that you may be addicted to them further lessens the seriousness of the offense. Addiction/habit should not be used as an excuse to engage in the activity but if one makes a sincere effort to avoid the action and fails due to habit/addition, the responsibility for an action is diminished or even nullified.

Given what you said, I do not believe that you sin mortally in this case but that is not something for me to judge. As was already mentioned, you may want to confess it just to be on the safe side.
 
Sir_Knight said:
You have no FORMAL commitment to a boyfriend as you would to a husband. So, that right there, lessens the seriousness of the offense and the fact that you may be addicted to them further lessens the seriousness of the offense. Addiction/habit should not be used as an excuse to engage in the activity but if one makes a sincere effort to avoid the action and fails due to habit/addition, the responsibility for an action is diminished or even nullified.

Given what you said, I do not believe that you sin mortally in this case but that is not something for me to judge. As was already mentioned, you may want to confess it just to be on the safe side.
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Well, I called my spiritual director and left him a voice mail. He called me back just now and I explained the situation to him. He told me that I did not commit any sin. Praise be to God! :extrahappy:
 
Yeah, that’s what I thought as well but do you know where your spiritual director’s opinion really count? When he expresses it in sacramental confession because he is then standing in the persona of Christ 😉
 
Holly3278 said:
Well, I called my spiritual director and left him a voice mail. He called me back just now and I explained the situation to him. He told me that I did not commit any sin. Praise be to God! :extrahappy:
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Holly, for future reference, unless you made your promise with absolutely no intent of even trying to keep it, there’s no possibility that you were either lying or committing a sin of any kind, let alone a mortal sin which is a more complicated issue.

And Sir Knight, telling someone as wracked with scruples as our poor friend Holly here to confess when she has no need, ‘just to be on the safe side’, is as counterproductive and harmful as telling someone who’s already a compulsive handwasher to wash their hands again, knowing they’ve already washed them a hundred times that day, because one more can’t hurt. For someone who isn’t scrupulous or compulsive your advice is correct. For those who suffer from either of these conditions it can and does hurt.

Someone who is over scrupulous needs to break that cycle of second-guessing about their sins, and the only way to do that is to IMPLICITLY trust their spiritual director and NOT confess unless he tells them it’s necessary.
 
No disrespect intended but I am a bit confused. Unless one checks previous posts that a member has made (which I don’t believe is the norm), how is one to know that a person is scrupulous? That wasn’t mentioned anywhere in the post that I was able to see and I offered the same advise that I would follow myself. Given the frightening message of Saint Leonard of Port Maurice, I’d rather confess something which wasn’t a sin rather than risk not properly confessing something that was a sin.
 
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