This is more directed at women but men are welcome to comment.
When you were a child did you imagine that your adult life would be similar to that of your mother?
I’m sure I though many things about my adult life would be similar to what I perceived of my mother’s life but I never really wanted to be just like her. She did so much housework and that seemed so terribly dreary to me. I guess I took it for granted that I’d be a mother some day but I never had any desire to care for a baby. I did NOT like helping my mother care for my infant siblings. I did play with some dolls and stuffed toys but not BABY dolls. I was more orchestrator of how these toys would live their lives; I was not a mother figure.
I remember telling people I wanted to be a nurse or a writer when I grew up. I think that was because nursing and teaching were the two professions women I knew belonged to. And I evidently knew that some writers were women. (The strange thing is that I hated writing as a child.) I can’t imagine I’d have made a very good nurse. When I was a tween and young teen I’d tell people I wanted to be an engineer like my Dad. That wasn’t exactly what happened but I did at one point have the job title of ‘software engineer’.
When you were a child did you imagine that your adult life would be similar to that of your mother?
I’m sure I though many things about my adult life would be similar to what I perceived of my mother’s life but I never really wanted to be just like her. She did so much housework and that seemed so terribly dreary to me. I guess I took it for granted that I’d be a mother some day but I never had any desire to care for a baby. I did NOT like helping my mother care for my infant siblings. I did play with some dolls and stuffed toys but not BABY dolls. I was more orchestrator of how these toys would live their lives; I was not a mother figure.
I remember telling people I wanted to be a nurse or a writer when I grew up. I think that was because nursing and teaching were the two professions women I knew belonged to. And I evidently knew that some writers were women. (The strange thing is that I hated writing as a child.) I can’t imagine I’d have made a very good nurse. When I was a tween and young teen I’d tell people I wanted to be an engineer like my Dad. That wasn’t exactly what happened but I did at one point have the job title of ‘software engineer’.
) I hadn’t figured out that the problem was me misbehaving, not my mom hehe. At one point later on I thought my mom was exaggerated in going to Mass every day and too strict for not letting me do everything “everyone else” was doing. I loved her as a mom, and loved how she loved us, but I wanted to be an aerobics instructor type mom, with expensive car, clothes, etc. married to a rich guy etc (and any other frivolus, superficial thing you can add). My mom was a widow working as a teacher who dressed nicely and always looked nice and elegant, but modestly and without fancy labels all over, and drove a normal mini-van. I guess at that point I didn’t want to be like her, but for the obvious wrong reasons. As I got older I realized what a gem of a mom I had, and in college and now that I am married and a mom I would love to be half the woman she is. I often think of what she did or would do in some situations.
So I was the only girl in the class with hot pink ballet slippers 
and she wondered why I refused to take any more ballet lessons after that year. :banghead:
but iam me and not her.
**
) when they screw up royally.