THe calvinist says that when it talks about God’s foreknowledge in Scripture, it’s not talking about His foreknowledge of what people are going to do, but His foreknowing People and then she quotes (2 Tim. 2:19)
It can mean both. The issue of Predestination is not a uniquely Calvinist “thing,” the Catholic Church infallibly teaches it as do solid Catholics like St Augustine and St Thomas.
p.s. 2 Tim 2:12 also teaches if we deny Christ, He will deny us, a not-so-Calvinist comment.
And then she cautions me about taking things like from Acts where Stephen says, You always resist the Holy Spirit, saying that I cannot take this passage as didactic or as a teaching passage, just like God says He will keep us in the shadow of His wings, we know He doesn’t literally have wings
That’s a bad argument because even if God doesn’t literally have wings the passage still means something, not to mention wings are clearly figurative where as St Stephen was not being figurative. Her argument fails, it is typical Calvinism of outright brushing off some Scripture in favor of others, where as Catholicism reads all the Scriptural evidence as a whole.
and she says that man doesn’t have the final say on whether he is saved or not
Because God holds our very being in existence every second, in that sense He ultimately has the final say on such things, and that is ok. At the same time, Scripture and Church are clear that God only damns those who turn away to grave sin, so if we are damned its our fault. So if God wants to give someone multiple chances and someone else only one, He does so and on ultimately good grounds.
Council of Trent:
For God does not forsake those who have been once justified by His grace, unless He be first forsaken by them.
, and saying that his death is sufficient for all but not efficacious for all doesn’t prove that man has the final say.
Catholics never said it did. People don’t accidentally end up in Heaven, God knew all along and sustained the Christian all along.
And she took Augustine’s quote to mean GOD draws one and not another, meaning predestination.
Not a problem, St Augustine (in the same context of Predestination) also said some genuine (justified) Christians fall away (due to their own sin, of course), and that why some fail to persevere was also a mystery that only God ultimately knew. Such a claim is thoroughly Catholic and Augustinian, but incompatible and anathema for Calvinism.
Also, I have a question, when does the grace of God become efficacious for a person, is it after they come to belief or before and does efficaciousness have something to do with free will? Does He offer everyone at first Sufficient grace and then after they open their hearts to them, He gives them efficacious grace?
I’m not an expert in this specific issue, but I’m pretty sure it is not efficacious ‘after’ we act because that wouldn’t make sense because grace inspires and enables and maintains good works.
As for how free will fits in and how He offers everyone grace, that is an open question which has not been infallibly decided, only parameters have been set down by the Church (eg you must affirm free will and that grace is offered to all).
I’ll bring someone over who knows the details here a bit better.