Divorce Question

[LostSheepUK]

I wondered if anyone can answer a question for me?

I am happily married and have been for 10 years, but this is my second marriage. My first marriage broke down after a few months although we lived together for 4 or 5 years trying to make it work.

My ex-wife was a selfish, lazy and all round nasty person who cheated on me throughout and did not respect me. Finally I had enough and left, but in order to extricate myself from her as quickly as possible I allowed her to divorce me for adultery even though I was faithful throughout our marriage and she was not.

I have only been married in a civilian service, never in church. Will this affect my conversion should I wish to follow the path I now see in front of me and come home?

Thanks in advance
Stuart

 

[ValPal]

I wondered if anyone can answer a question for me?

I am happily married and have been for 10 years, but this is my second marriage. My first marriage broke down after a few months although we lived together for 4 or 5 years trying to make it work.

My ex-wife was a selfish, lazy and all round nasty person who cheated on me throughout and did not respect me. Finally I had enough and left, but in order to extricate myself from her as quickly as possible I allowed her to divorce me for adultery even though I was faithful throughout our marriage and she was not.

I have only been married in a civilian service, never in church. Will this affect my conversion should I wish to follow the path I now see in front of me and come home?

Thanks in advance
Stuart

This issue will have to be addressed as part of your conversion. Your priest will give you the appropriate guidance.

 

[Allegra]

It is a matter that will have to be addressed with your priest. Based on what you have said, and assuming your current spouse was not previously married, you will probably be able to get your current marriage convalidated in the Church, but you will first have to go through the process of the Church making certain that your first marriage was invalid. It will probably be pretty simple, since you were only legally married, but you should let your priest know about it so it can be addressed right away.

 

[Cryptic1]

I wondered if anyone can answer a question for me?

I am happily married and have been for 10 years, but this is my second marriage. My first marriage broke down after a few months although we lived together for 4 or 5 years trying to make it work.

My ex-wife was a selfish, lazy and all round nasty person who cheated on me throughout and did not respect me. Finally I had enough and left, but in order to extricate myself from her as quickly as possible I allowed her to divorce me for adultery even though I was faithful throughout our marriage and she was not.

I have only been married in a civilian service, never in church. Will this affect my conversion should I wish to follow the path I now see in front of me and come home?

Thanks in advance
Stuart

The issue of you allowing your ex wife to file for divorce on the grounds of adultery is solely a civil, not a church matter. The first marriage was never a “true” marriage in the eyes of the church (and God) and the same goes for your second marriage. In order to set things right, you just have to validate your second marriage by calling the catholic church near you and taking the steps to get married in the church.

At least one of the parties must be catholic and the question of whether your wife wants to convert as well may be brought up. Also, engagement encounter sessions are almost mandatory within the church, to ensure a good measure of success for the marriage.

God bless you on your journey.

 

[runningdude]

I wondered if anyone can answer a question for me?

I am happily married and have been for 10 years, but this is my second marriage. My first marriage broke down after a few months although we lived together for 4 or 5 years trying to make it work.

My ex-wife was a selfish, lazy and all round nasty person who cheated on me throughout and did not respect me. Finally I had enough and left, but in order to extricate myself from her as quickly as possible I allowed her to divorce me for adultery even though I was faithful throughout our marriage and she was not.

I have only been married in a civilian service, never in church. Will this affect my conversion should I wish to follow the path I now see in front of me and come home?

Thanks in advance
Stuart

Because you are not-Catholic, a marriage in a civil service would be valid for you in most circumstances (Only Catholics are obliged to seek a religious ceremony).

However, because of the infidelity that manifested so soon following the ceremony, your first wife may never have intended to remain faithful. This could be grounds for an annulment, declaring the first marriage invalid. It is not certain that an annulment would be granted, but I believe you would have a case for one.

If your current spouse was never married prior, then you could validly marry her after getting an annulment through your local Catholic bishop. Completing these steps would then make you able to convert to Catholicism. The bishop’s office or your local parish would have more information.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I wondered if anyone can answer a question for me?

I am happily married and have been for 10 years, but this is my second marriage. My first marriage broke down after a few months although we lived together for 4 or 5 years trying to make it work.

My ex-wife was a selfish, lazy and all round nasty person who cheated on me throughout and did not respect me. Finally I had enough and left, but in order to extricate myself from her as quickly as possible I allowed her to divorce me for adultery even though I was faithful throughout our marriage and she was not.

I have only been married in a civilian service, never in church. Will this affect my conversion should I wish to follow the path I now see in front of me and come home?

Thanks in advance
Stuart

See your priest as soon as possible, and give him all of the facts. You will probably have to apply for an annulment for the 1st marriage but your priest will know or will refer you to the diocesan staff who will know.

Welcome Home!!! (you’re on your way!)

 

[maltmom]

Welcome Home!!! As others have said your priest will guide you on what to do next.

 

[ValPal]

There’s not enough information to begin to speculate on what the situation of the prior marriage is. Prior bond, baptismal status of the wife, whether or not either party was Catholic and married with the proper dispensation(s), etc. all matter and determine the course of action.

 

[katy]

You would probably need to get the annulment, or maybe not, as others have pointed out. As non-Catholics, the Church requirements would not have applied and so a civil marriage would still be a marriage. From the facts you stated, a declaration of nullity should not be all that difficult. Talk to a knowledgeable, sound priest.

 

[ValPal]

Marriage dissolution may also be an option if one of the parties was not baptized.