The comparison is not necessarily how one comes into full communion, but what it means not to be in full communion. The reasons seem irrelevant to the concern of whether denying communion is compassionate or just burdensome and judgmental.
In this light, the comparison makes more sense. (On the face of it, of course, the posters who raised the distinction between “prior to being in full communion” and “having been in full communion but willingly leaving that communion” are right – that part of the story is what makes the comparison difficult to appreciate.)
Now… strictly speaking, you’re
not “waiting for Confirmation”, per se. You’re waiting for your First Holy Communion (which, given the ritual, means that it will be after baptisms and confirmations takes place on Easter Vigil).
Is this ‘compassionate’ toward you? That’s an interesting way of looking at it. It’s certainly
charitable – even St Paul warns against eating and drinking without discerning the Body of Christ; and, in your RCIA program and/or preparation, you are being given the catechesis that will permit you to participate in the Eucharist without this lack of discernment. Is that ‘compassion’ – that is, ‘feeling for’ you? I would say not. This doesn’t have to do with the Church addressing your feelings, but rather, with the Church carefully preparing you for the sacraments.
Is it ‘judgmental’ toward you? Certainly, I can understand that, given that you wish full communion with the Church, you would rather have the Eucharist
now… yet, the Church has given people the responsibility of discerning when you are properly prepared for the sacraments. In this light, this time of difficult waiting for you isn’t a ‘judgment’ upon you, but rather, is simply the case that those who are responsible for your catechesis are fulfilling their obligations. In both cases, then, I don’t know that I would say that this is either ‘compassionate’ or ‘judgmental’… but rather, is an opportunity for you to learn and be formed by the teachings of the Church.
But, what about those who had been part of the Church, and decided to leave that communion through their actions? Is the Church’s action – refusing them absolution of sins of which they do not repent, and refusing them participation in the sacraments – ‘compassionate’? Is it ‘judgmental’? Here, too, I think that I would make the same distinction.
It’s not ‘compassionate’, per se. Again, the Church’s actions aren’t about “feelings” here – they’re
charitable, since it’s important that people don’t “eat and drink judgment” upon themselves through unworthy reception of Communion. It’s not “judgmental”, either – there’s no ‘judgment’ taking place, but rather, simply a recognition of the situation in which the people have placed themselves through their actions.
So, in both cases, I think I wouldn’t describe this either as ‘compassion’ or ‘judgment’, but rather, the Church’s maternal care for her children: would a parent give her child a scorpion when he asked for an egg? Of course not – and, although for
different reasons, participation in the sacraments would be more a ‘scorpion’ than an ‘egg’ right now, whether that’s something that’s obvious or not to you or to those in a state of mortal sin. For you, in due time, the Eucharist will be made available. To those in a state of mortal sin, it will be made available when they are able to repent and leave that state of sin. This is certainly a situation that is difficult and a trial – without a doubt! But, that doesn’t mean that it rises to the level of ‘judgment’…
You’re doing the right thing. Prayers ascending for you and your cause.