Do I really have to wear button up shirts and skirts?

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Doinggood

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My mother took away all of my hoodies and leggings and told me I am no longer allowed to wear them. They are locked in her closet now and as she said they are just waiting for donation to charity. I am really sad about that because I love wearing hoodies and leggings. And there´s also one special hoodie I love the most - I feel pure bliss while wearing it. It was taken away from me out of the blue and I can´t stand tha fact I´m not gonna wear it anymore. It ´s frustrating and I´m desperate and hopeless. Mother is stubborn about this and told me I have to get used to wearing nice shirts and dresses because I´m old enough to look sleek. She wants me to wear shirts also when I´m at home and keeps telling me it´s for my own good. But I hate shirts from the heart. I need just my beloved hoodie back. Not all the hoodies, just that beloved one… Please, what can I do?
 
Doinggood said:
I need serious answers, but thanks anyway.
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If you need a serious answer, I encourage you to sit down with your mother and talk about it. If she is unwilling to compromise, then perhaps you should ask your pastor at your church to sit down with both of you and mediate the situation.
 
Doinggood said:
My mother took away all of my hoodies and leggings and told me I am no longer allowed to wear them. They are locked in her closet now and as she said they are just waiting for donation to charity. I am really sad about that because I love wearing hoodies and leggings. And there´s also one special hoodie I love the most - I feel pure bliss while wearing it. It was taken away from me out of the blue and I can´t stand tha fact I´m not gonna wear it anymore. It ´s frustrating and I´m desperate and hopeless. Mother is stubborn about this and told me I have to get used to wearing nice shirts and dresses because I´m old enough to look sleek. She wants me to wear shirts also when I´m at home and keeps telling me it´s for my own good. But I hate shirts from the heart. I need just my beloved hoodie back. Not all the hoodies, just that beloved one… Please, what can I do?
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I’m not really sure what to tell you. There’s nothing at all wrong with hoodies. It’s not like I can get your hoodies back for you, and I won’t tell you to disobey your mother.

Best thing to do is to talk to your mother about how you feel. Be sure to be very calm about it; open defiance will only make things worse.
 
Do you think it could work? I´m afraid mother can get angry.
 
Maybe you’ll feel better after sometime wearing the nice shirts and skirts. They are not all that bad.
 
Doinggood said:
Do you think it could work? I´m afraid mother can get angry.
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In that case, it’s doubly important that you remain calm. Did she explain further why she doesn’t want you wearing hoodies? Does she just want you to look nice all the time?

It’s important that you make an effort to understand where she’s coming from, even if (especially if) you think she’s in the wrong.
 
You could offer a compromise? Shirts and slacks during the week, your favorite hoodie on Saturdays. Or nice clothes during the day, hoodies after 7pm.
 
She wants me to look like honest youg lady and hoodies are very casual and gangsta in her opinion…😦
 
Doinggood said:
She wants me to look like honest youg lady and hoodies are very casual and gangsta in her opinion…😦
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Hmmm. Well, there’s nothing wrong with being casual in a casual context (like your home). Hoodies are especially useful in fall, when it’s too cold for just a shirt, and too warm for a winter coat.

Perhaps you can agree to only wear them during certain times of the year?

EDIT: Depending on where you live, she could be right about hoodies specifically. If the prevailing attitude where you live is that hoodies are “gangsta”, it might not be wise to wear them in certain places. In that case, you’ll have to accept her judgement on the hoodies. However, I don’t think you should give up on compromise just yet, and no matter what happens you should remember that honesty has to do with keeping your word and obeying the law, not with whether you look nice.
 
Maybe you were acting a little too “gangsta” around the house, and she’s sending you a message: change your attitude or I’ll change it for you. 😉
 
Doinggood said:
My mother took away all of my hoodies and leggings and told me I am no longer allowed to wear them. They are locked in her closet now and as she said they are just waiting for donation to charity. I am really sad about that because I love wearing hoodies and leggings. And there´s also one special hoodie I love the most - I feel pure bliss while wearing it. It was taken away from me out of the blue and I can´t stand tha fact I´m not gonna wear it anymore. It ´s frustrating and I´m desperate and hopeless. Mother is stubborn about this and told me I have to get used to wearing nice shirts and dresses because I´m old enough to look sleek. She wants me to wear shirts also when I´m at home and keeps telling me it´s for my own good. But I hate shirts from the heart. I need just my beloved hoodie back. Not all the hoodies, just that beloved one… Please, what can I do?
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Uh, wow… that sucks.

Unfortunately there’s nothing you can do at this point. Just wait until you’re 18, get a job, move out, and then you don’t have to follow your mom’s ridiculous dress code anymore.
 
Leggings aren’t pants!

I don’t have kids, but I want to take leggings away from people that wear them as pants. I don’t need to see people’s lady bits.

When you talk to your mom, explain to her that it is going to get super expensive to change your whole wardrobe. lol.
 
I have the same problem. I wear nothing but hoodies. My mother has given up on that. I think it’s becoming a serious issue. People have even started giving me hoodies as gifts… Everyone knows about the elephant in the room.

Do you think your mom is trying to help you by removing your hoodies?

Just curious, do you feel protection or safe while wearing hoodies?

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Doinggood said:
My mother took away all of my hoodies and leggings and told me I am no longer allowed to wear them. They are locked in her closet now and as she said they are just waiting for donation to charity. I am really sad about that because I love wearing hoodies and leggings. And there´s also one special hoodie I love the most - I feel pure bliss while wearing it. It was taken away from me out of the blue and I can´t stand tha fact I´m not gonna wear it anymore. It ´s frustrating and I´m desperate and hopeless. Mother is stubborn about this and told me I have to get used to wearing nice shirts and dresses because I´m old enough to look sleek. She wants me to wear shirts also when I´m at home and keeps telling me it´s for my own good. But I hate shirts from the heart. I need just my beloved hoodie back. Not all the hoodies, just that beloved one… Please, what can I do?
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The question here isn’t whether your mother is right or wrong it’s about obedience and honoring your mother as God commands. Your Mother loves you and no doubt seeing all the **** that’s going around is scared for you. Like many parents we are not good at expressing this love and our fears for our children directly. On top of that your mother has no doubt amassed some wisdom over the years and really just wants the best for you. The question is now how much you love her and are you willing to sacrifice for her.
 
1ke said:
Please find another place to troll.
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Whoa. Kinda harsh for a person with only 4 posts, no? Benefit of the doubt?

To the OP, nobody here knows the context of this in the overall relationship you have with your mom. I suggest you ask for help from someone your mom knows and respects (dad, aunt, pastor, etc). Nobody here qualifies.
 
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