Do not desire a multitude of godless children

[JLCecilia]

First of all, if anyone knows where this passage is in the Bible, please let me know.

Now that my youngest is 2 1/2, I’m having the biological pangs for another. Logistically speaking, though, the offer is off the table both for me AND DH. He never desired so many babies as quickly as they came, I’m not sure at this point that he EVER wants to have more - save a change of heart from God.

For me, I don’t want to have another baby that I can’t stay home with (I have to work), but I also don’t want to go through the heartache of finding sitters for 4 children and likely having to split them up. We can’ t even afford a full-time sitter for THREE!

So right now, it would be unwise to have more, even though I fully trust God to provide for us as He has provided for us so far in unimaginable ways. So here’s my thing, and correct me if I’m wrong. I was sitting in church with my girlfriend and I was so emotional anyway b/c my sleep cycle had been off all week, we’re changing priests, and DH is getting ready to start school, so we’re already spending less time together.

In walks a young couple our age with 3 babies about our childrens’ ages and I just thought to myself that DH doesn’t come with us to mass and wants nothing to do with our faith or religion. My girlfriend invited me and my kids to mass one evening and, to me, their antics and busy-bodiedness as absolutely unacceptable. I just felt like an aweful parent and I have no right to desire more children.

This passage entered my mind and just stung: Do not desire a multitude of godless children. I come from a Catholic family with 6 children and only half of us (maybe) practice the faith, but our relationship with each other and our parents is strained and none of us really keeps in touch with one another. DH comes from a small family with 3 children and we all live in the same town and just look for an excuse to get together, but none of them practices any kind of faith.

Feeling unfit.

 

[FullOfThought]

See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that in heaven their angels always see the face of my Father who is in heaven.
(Matthew 18:10)

Not what you’re askingfor but it’s my favorite.

These were the readings for Sunday, if you can remember the date you can go to it and find the scripture reading. thirstycatholics.com/?p=526

I feel that you are under a lot of stress, I am sorry. I don’t think your children are ‘ungodly’, they are babies! My mom used to make us go to mass every day until we became ‘adapted’

 

[exoflare]

This doesn’t match 100% what you asked for, but it’s the first thing that popped into my head when I saw your post.

Sirach 16:1-3
1Do not yearn for worthless children,
or rejoice in wicked offspring.
2Even if they be many, do not rejoice in them
if they do not have fear of the LORD.
3Do not count on long life for them,a
or have any hope for their future.
For one can be better than a thousand;
rather die childless than have impious children!

 

[St_Francis]

Do you take your children to Mass regularly? Are they used to going to the Mass you went to with your friend? I have taken my children, when they were younger, to an evening Mass and had the whole thing turn out badly because they had had a pretty full day already, but they were used to the morning Mass and behaved (fairly) well there

Children have to *learn *to go to Mass; it’s not that they get to a certain age and “are able” to go.

It is very natural to want more children, esp at the age your youngest is. Your older children are in school, no? So there is less need for babysitting (in fact, you might look into what it costs you to work. Some people who do not have high-paying jobs find that when you work out all the expenses of working, and the ways they could save money if they were not working, that it doesn’t make economic sense to work. I figured out that with babysitting and transportation costs, I would make $1/hour for every hour I was away from the children–and that just wasn’t enough!)

It is hard to see the contrast between the “Godless” but close family and the Catholic but not-close family… it sounds like you are comparing the best of the “other” with the worst of your own. Imagine if your husband’s family were all faithful Catholics–that would make the good thing they have even better!

By a natural virtue, I mean what Christ was talking about when He said, Love your enemies, it’s easy to love your friends, even pagans do that.

 

[HouseArrest]

Your children aren’t done yet. Neither is your immediate family, for that matter.

All you can do is your best in trying to raise your children. If God sees fit to send you another, then trust Him.

 

[Luna_Lovecraft]

…I was so emotional anyway b/c my sleep cycle had been off all week, we’re changing priests, and DH is getting ready to start school, so we’re already spending less time together.

Stop right there.

You’re not sleeping, which means you’re not thinking clearly. Put off thinking about growing your family, other people’s children, your husband’s academic career and how that impacts your marriage, and feeling unfit until your sleeping patterns are back to normal. I guarantee that you’ll be able to think more clearly about all of this once you’re well-rested.

Luna

 

[JLCecilia]

St. Francis - yes, my kids (6 & under) go with me to mass every weekend. I tried just taking the older 2 on Saturday evenings so we could sit with the rest of the parish thinking if I could just get the 2 of them trained I could bring the littlest one along later. Lately we’ve been so busy, that’s been impossible and with DH working @ his dad’s farm Sunday mornings, that leaves me to take all 3 of them with me and we just have to sit in the cry room. I try to tell myself that as the older 2 start going to mass on a daily basis at school that will help.

I shouldn’t project the future, but I just started getting bummed this week when my oldest mentioned somthing about daddy never going to mass and I began to cringe thinking of the possible battle when they get old enough to form an opinion. For now, I’m just going to pour myself into sharing the Faith with them and hope for the best and pray for them every day.