Do Nuns Have It Harder?

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Whoah! There are a lot of misunderstandings here.

Let’s start with nuns.

A nun is a woman religious who is a monastic. She makes solemn vows of obedience, poverty and chastity. She may live either in a community or as a hermit, but always physically separated from the world. As to having pets, that’s a community decision. There is no universal rule for or against it. The only rule is charity. If it’s an inconvenience to the community, charity commands that you not have pet, other than goldfish, because they don’t bark or shed.

Let’s move to sisters.

A sister is a women religious who is active. She makes simple vows of obedience, poverty and chastity. The degree of consecration is not as grave as solemn vows. They live according to the mind of their founder. Some are more involved with the secular world and some are less. For example, Vincent de Paul wanted his sisters to be secular in every sense. The Daughters of charity do not make a novitiate, they never make perpetual vows. Every year on Mar 25, they renew their vows for one year. They have no superior. They have no rule of life. Vincent gave them statutes that direct their work. The rest is up to them to decide. There are other sisters whose lives as similar to that of nuns. They have more structure, a novitiate, superiors and live in convents. However, they never make solemn vows. They make simple vows, which they make for life.

Sisters and nuns are consecrated religious.

Now let’s go to priests.

First myth is that priests are consecrated. Priests are not consecrated men. They are ordained men. The priesthood is the second order of the Sacrament of Holy Orders. The hands of the priest are consecrated for the purpose of consecrating the Eucharist. The life of the priest is not a consecrated life. Those priests who want to live a consecrated life, become religious. Those who do not, which is over 80%, are secular priests and are usually tied to a diocese. Some belong to societies of secular priests such as the FSSP, Maryknoll, Missionhurst, Vincentians, Institute of Christ the King Sovereign Priest and even the SSPX.

Now let’s go to male religious.

Male religious may be monks, lay brothers, or friars. It is ABSOLUTELY NOT TRUE that brothers strive to be priests in their community. A man joins a religious community to be a Franciscan, Benedictine, Carmelite, Jesuit, Salesian, etc. He does not join to be a priest.

Some religious communities are communities for priests, such as the Passionists or the Fathers of Mercy. Communities of Friars, Brothers and Monks are not communities of priests. Many Friars, Brothers and Monks are priests, but they DO NOT CEASE to be friar, monk or brother. This is their identity. The priesthood is a vocation within a vocation.

The religious life of these men is a consecrated life, be they priests or not. The consecration happens because of the vows, not because of the Sacrament of Holy Orders. There are two kinds of religious communities of men: orders and congregations.

Orders would be: Carmelites, Augustinians, Dominicans, Franciscans, Bendictines, Trappists, and Jesuits. These men, ordained or not, make solemn vows, which is great degree of consecration than that of other religious.

Congregations would be: Salesians, Passionists, Fathers of Mercy, Christian Brothers, Holy Cross Fathers and Brothers, Marianist Brothers, Franciscans of the Renewal. These men make simple vows of obedience, poverty and chastity. This means that the Church looks at their vows with a lesser degree of consecration.
 
Finally the brothers.

Any man who belongs to a community of monks, friars or lay brothers is a brother. For example, Fr. Benedict Groeschel is a brother. I’m a brother. Fr. Benedict is ordained. I am not. We have the same rights and duties in the religious life. Our difference is in our ministry.

In religious communities of men, the major superior is the voice of Christ. He decides who can make vows and who has to leave. After the man has made either solemn vows for life or simple perpetual vows, the superior decides if he can be ordained or not. Christ calls the man to the consecrated life and to the priesthood, through the superior, no other way.

There are times when a superior may turn someone down for vows. That person goes to another community and is admitted for vows. He was turned down, because while Christ was calling him or her to be a consecrated religious, Christ wanted him or her to be a Dominican, not a Franciscan. Christ manages to find his way.

As to pets, the rule for men religious is the same as the rule for women religious. The community decides.

As to the vows, if you take away the vows, you have a secular order, not a religious community. There is no such thing as a women religious or male religious without vows. The vows can be public or private, but they are vows.

Diocesan/secular priests make no vows at all. There is another myth. People believe that they make a vow of celibacy and a vow of obedience. NOT TRUE.

When a secular man is to be ordained a deacon (permanent or transitional) he is asked if he PROMISES obedience to his bishop. He does not surrender his life to the bishop, as do religious in a vow of obedience. The bishop’s authority is limited to policy and to whatever Canon Law allows. The authority of the religious superior goes beyond policy. He or she can control the color of your toothbrush, if the founder set it up that way. If the religious is to be ordained, he is not asked to promise obedience or celibacy. Religious never vow obedience to a bishop. Celibacy is not necessary, because we already made a vow of chastity.

At the ordination to the diaconate, the bishop asks the candidate if he is willing to remain celibate for the sake of the Kingdom of God. If the candidate is married, the promise does not kick in until he is single. If the candidate is single, the promise kicks in immediately and he may not marry. This is not the same as a vow of chastity. This is a promise not to marry.

The vow of chastity that religious make is a covenant where we promise never to sin against chastity. It goes beyond marriage. We promise never to look at another person for love and intimacy but Jesus Christ. If we do so, we sin against the virtue of purity and against the vow.

It’s like a married person who cheats. He sins against purity and against the marriage vow. It’s double jeopardy. The same holds true for men and women religious, but not for diocesan deacons and priests. If they commit an impure act, they sin against purity, not against any vow. They never made a vow to be chaste.

What makes one man consecrated and another not? The vows. The man or woman in vows is consecrated. The man or woman who is not in vows is a secular person. He can be a priest or a husband, both are secular.

These secular priests do not have a community, because they do not have a vow of chastity that binds them to a new family. They own property, because they never promised not to own property. If the priests father is Bill Gates and Mr. Gates dies, the son inherits Microsoft and he is allowed to keep it and remain a priest. He’s a secular man. He can own a business.

If Mr. Gates son is a consecrated religious, ordained or not, he has no legal right to inherit, not even in civil law. The night before we make vows, we sign a legal document renouncing everything we own and everything that we inherit. We pick a beneficiary outside of the religious community. Everything goes to that person.

Nuns don’t have it harder. Each person is gifted with a call. The demands of that call depend on the state in life (religious or secular) and on the religious community to which one is called. Priests can be either, religious or secular.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
JReducation~ thank for taking the time to answer and clarify many things.

I have a few questions, but will limit myself to these:

Diocesan/secular priests make no vow of celibacy or chastity?

If so, then why all the gasps and shock if they are discovered to have had a relationship with someone?

Also, why does the Church allow someone who takes lesser vows to listen to confession?
 
JReducation~ thank for taking the time to answer and clarify many things.

I have a few questions, but will limit myself to these:

Diocesan/secular priests make no vow of celibacy or chastity?
Diocesan priests promise to live a celibate life. Therefore, they are promising to remain single for the sake of the Kingdom. Like all single people, they are morally obliged to refrain from sexual activity.
If so, then why all the gasps and shock if they are discovered to have had a relationship with someone?
My guess is that there are several reasons, some of which make sense and others have to do with the ignorance of the man in the pew.
  1. You hold priests to a higher moral standard. This is legitimate.
  2. People believe that priests make vows of chastity. This is ignorance. They do not.
Also, why does the Church allow someone who takes lesser vows to listen to confession?
Go back and look at what I said above. The vows make you a consecrated religious. They do not make you a priest. Whether you make simple vows or solemn vows, you’re a consecrated religious. What makes you a priest is the Sacrament of Holy Orders.

The ordained do not need to be in vows to exercise the priesthood.

And religious do not need to be priests to be consecrated men or women.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
So, in theory- a priest could date as long they were not intimate with the person???
 
So, in theory- a priest could date as long they were not intimate with the person???
Think of the scandal that would cause.
It may not be a sin against the virtue of purity, but it certainly would be conduct unbecoming anyone who is celibate, priest, brother, sister or nun. Because it’s conduct that is unbecoming, it lends itself to scandal. The sin would be in doing something that one knows will give scandal.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
I hope I didnt offend anyone by asking… I know I ask too many questions sometimes.😊

Are secular priests the only religious who do not make vows of chastity?

Is it maybe to keep them in a better state with God - because they have greater risk of slipping as they are exposed to the secular world?
 
I understand that, but is the theory correct?
No.

What is the purpose of dating? To find someone to marry.

A priest, as well as any religious, are free to form friendships with anyone including those of the opposite sex.

When one talks of dating they are talking of an intimate form of friendship that priests should not be cultivating.
 
I hope I didnt offend anyone by asking… I know I ask too many questions sometimes.😊

Are secular priests the only religious who do not make vows of chastity?
A secular or diocesan priest is not a religious. To be a religious you must be a member of a religious order or a member of a religious congregation. A secular priest is a priest, period. Secular and religious are antonyms.
Is it maybe to keep them in a better state with God - because they have greater risk of slipping as they are exposed to the secular world?
Not at all. They are where God wants them to be, in the secular world. If they are faithful to their calling they will remain close to God. God does not put us on slippery slopes. We put ourselves there.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
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