Do you hold hands during Our Father?

[catholicWI]

When I was a kid (in 30s now), we never held hands during this. When I came back to the faith a few years ago, everyone seemed to hold hands so I just figured it was something I never noticed before. But now that I started going to a more traditional parish, I notice no one there seems to hold hands. I think holding hands is kinda cheesy personally. Did this somehow start to become a thing in the last 15 years?

 

[johnnykins]

When I was a kid (in 30s now), we never held hands during this. When I came back to the faith a few years ago, everyone seemed to hold hands so I just figured it was something I never noticed before. But now that I started going to a more traditional parish, I notice no one there seems to hold hands. I think holding hands is kinda cheesy personally. Did this somehow start to become a thing in the last 15 years?

I believe it started sometime in the 80s or 90s. Not every congregation did it. The only time I do it is when someone grabs my hand - which I keep folded in front of me. I won’t make a scene, but I agree…extra cheesy.

Now, if we can do something about the sign of peace…especially the flashing the old anti-War sign from the Vietnam era…that would be great! (I especially love that when someone flashes that sign, but turns it around not knowing that in many countries it is like flipping the bird.) I often think God has a very refined sense of humor.

 

[catholicWI]

I believe it started sometime in the 80s or 90s. Not every congregation did it. The only time I do it is when someone grabs my hand - which I keep folded in front of me. I won’t make a scene, but I agree…extra cheesy.

Now, if we can do something about the sign of peace…especially the flashing the old anti-War sign from the Vietnam era…that would be great! (I especially love that when someone flashes that sign, but turns it around not knowing that in many countries it is like flipping the bird.) I often think God has a very refined sense of humor.

That’s the other thing I notice in my more traditional parish–people don’t do much for the sign of peace…which I like. It’s cheesy and is in a really bad place during Mass–in the middle of the Eucharistic Prayer?! So weird!

What do you do during it? I turn and usually kiss my wife on her cheek and whisper “I love you”, and shake hands of people around me that are close by.

 

[KD8TZC]

Our bishop asked us all, if we are able (some people just won’t go of older methods/traditions, so that is what he means my able), to use the Orans posture (the elbows close to the sides of the body and with the hands outstretched sideways, palms up).

My wife and I will do a modified version of this. We will hold hands with one hand, and then do the Orans with the other hand.

John

 

[FrenzyJen]

Nope. It’s a liturgical abuse, and something that is not written in the rubrics of the mass. The general population is not allowed to make changes to the mass, which is what this is, essentially. It’s awkward sometimes, because not everyone realizes this, but oh well. I believe Orans posture is a no-no as well. I fold my hands and bow my head.

ewtn.com/expert/answers/holding_hands_at_mass.htm

 

[jediliz]

No, I do not and if a stranger tries to do this to me if I am at an unfamiliar church, I will NOT comply.

And we are not to do the Orans posture- that is for priests only. I prefer to fold my hands prayerfully during the Our Father.

 

[catholicWI]

My wife and I will do a modified version of this. We will hold hands with one hand, and then do the Orans with the other hand.

John

I guess that’s what I have become accustomed to in my suburban parish. Is this a newer thing (last 20 years)? Why is it a thing even?

 

[ProVobis]

That’s the other thing I notice in my more traditional parish–people don’t do much for the sign of peace…which I like.

To be fair, the sign of peace is not a total break from tradition. It’s done in a Solemn High Mass, but only between clergy members. In the Maronite Rite, the sign of peace is extended to the congregation from the altar.

 

[on_the_hill]

I’ve heard the standard rubrics argument before, but you could really go crazy with that. The rubric probably doesn’t include sneezing or yawning. When praying should the fingers be straight up or intertwined like fists?

Yes, we hold hands. Yes, I think it’s cheesy. No, we don’t hold hands with strangers, only those within our nuclear family: me, my wife, and our three children. I think it started organically, when they were little ones. It’s very natural to old a toddler’s hand, particularly when you want him or her to stand up and be still. It probably started with that and we’ve just kept on keepin’ on.

No, I do not holy my father-in-law’s hand.

And you won’t find me doin’ one of those Protestant Orans things, either.

 

[JimG]

In may parish, at the sign of peace, those in the congregation normally turn to one another and say “peace be with you.” Which is, after all, a sign of peace, and a reflection of what the priest just said to us. I haven’t noticed much hand holding, although there are local variations. I’ve seen some couples exchange a quick kiss, but that is really more of a PDA than a liturgical action. (By rights, they should kiss everyone else as well.)

 

[Deep_Roots]

We do it. I love it.

 

[Brendan]

Nope.

 

[CHRISTINE77]

It’s becoming less and less of a thing. Families still do it occasionally, but rarely do others.

 

[DaveBj]

It’s becoming less and less of a thing. Families still do it occasionally, but rarely do others.

That’s pretty much the experience in our parish – hand-holding is dying out. Father Patrick has said that he is going to do a homily (or letter-insert to the bulletin – I forget) soon about hand actions during Mass.

 

[Jeanne_S]

I get that the intention is to recognize our brothers and sisters in Christ by holding hands,coming together as a faith community.BUT,I think it is unnecessary and it really gets to be a production in my large parish with folks walking all over the church to hug,etc…

 

[Memaw]

Nope. It’s a liturgical abuse, and something that is not written in the rubrics of the mass. The general population is not allowed to make changes to the mass, which is what this is, essentially. It’s awkward sometimes, because not everyone realizes this, but oh well. I believe Orans posture is a no-no as well. I fold my hands and bow my head.

ewtn.com/expert/answers/holding_hands_at_mass.htm

I think it started from the Walton’s TV program holding hands while saying Grace. We do not do it in our parish. Some tried to start it at one time and seems Father put and end to it. Hope it stays that way. Our attention should be on the words were praying not the person were holding hands with. Not a part of the Mass and should NOT be done. Now if ya wanna hold hands after Mass, we can talk about it, HA. God Bless, Memaw

 

[johnnykins]

That’s the other thing I notice in my more traditional parish–people don’t do much for the sign of peace…which I like. It’s cheesy and is in a really bad place during Mass–in the middle of the Eucharistic Prayer?! So weird!

What do you do during it? I turn and usually kiss my wife on her cheek and whisper “I love you”, and shake hands of people around me that are close by.

Actually the Sign of Peace is AFTER the Eucharistic Prayer. It is right before the Agnus Dei.I find it disruptive and silly as practiced in most every parish I’ve been to. I do think it is really cheesy and so 70s! I feel we should all be wearing leisure suits.

I pretty much do what you do. If there is a distant person who makes a point of motioning (sometimes giving the Sign of “Piece” as I call the reversed V sign), I usually nod my head and mouth “Peace”

 

[CHRISTINE77]

Actually the Sign of Peace is AFTER the Eucharistic Prayer. It is right before the Agnus Dei.I find it disruptive and silly as practiced in most every parish I’ve been to. I do think it is really cheesy and so 70s! I feel we should all be wearing leisure suits.

I pretty much do what you do. If there is a distant person who makes a point of motioning (sometimes giving the Sign of “Piece” as I call the reversed V sign), I usually nod my head and mouth “Peace”

So true!
Doesn’t really bother me, but it does seem out of place in Mass. As does all the hugging and kissing during the sign of the peace. I wish more churches would require kneeling after the Agnus Dei though. It’s such a beautiful plea to Jesus.

 

[Lormar]

Actually the Sign of Peace is AFTER the Eucharistic Prayer. It is right before the Agnus Dei.I find it disruptive and silly as practiced in most every parish I’ve been to. I do think it is really cheesy and so 70s! I feel we should all be wearing leisure suits.

I pretty much do what you do. If there is a distant person who makes a point of motioning (sometimes giving the Sign of “Piece” as I call the reversed V sign), I usually nod my head and mouth “Peace”

I’m with you.

I think the hand holding came from Alcoholics Anonymous.

In any event, it really has no part in the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. A pastor in our parish tried to eradicate it years ago, but didn’t have much luck.

 

[tawny]

No I do not. Neither do I assume the Orans position; that is only for the Celebrant. I fold my hands in prayer. At the Sign of Peace; I just nod to the people & say “Peace be with you”.