Do you regret having been born?

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prodigalson2011 said:
I can tell from your writing, Robert, that you are far from dumb. “Dumb” people wouldn’t describe themselves as “cognitively mediocre.”
I didn’t have as rough of a childhood as you, but I share some of your impediments. You exhibit a great deal of clarity in your writing. Maybe this is a strength you should focus on?
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I agree with Prodigalson, Robert, you are quite, or even very, intelligent. Your writing is testimony to that.

You should learn to have a much higher opinion of yourself than you have. And don’t be afraid of losing humility in the process, as long as you appreciate that you got all your gifts from God.

Humility does not consist of thinking yourself to be lower than others, but on the contrary, appreciating the special talents that you have, yet then as primarily being an undeserved gift from God. Such appreciative humility should lead to deep gratitude before God, but not to putting down yourself in front of others.

I know that I have my talents from God, and I also know that I am far less grateful for them than I should be, but I am also aware that I have some talents in greater excess than given to some fellow human beings. In other words, I know my worth, and I am not going to hide it – and I know that I have the responsibility to properly use the talents that God has given me.
 
TheRealJuliane said:
No. Even in the midst of my depressive episodes, I do not regret having been born. Never. I might wish for my life to be over, because I feel exhausted from life, and am depressed, but I never EVER wished that I hadn’t been born.

I think I’ve improved the world just by my presence!

:D;)
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We all improve the world by our presence! As Milton wrote when he was blind “He also serves who only stands and waits.” 👍
 
Al_Moritz said:
I agree with Prodigalson, Robert, you are quite, or even very, intelligent. Your writing is testimony to that.

You should learn to have a much higher opinion of yourself than you have. And don’t be afraid of losing humility in the process, as long as you appreciate that you got all your gifts from God.

Humility does not consist of thinking yourself to be lower than others, but on the contrary, appreciating the special talents that you have, yet then as primarily being an undeserved gift from God. Such appreciative humility should lead to deep gratitude before God, but not to putting down yourself in front of others.

I know that I have my talents from God, and I also know that I am far less grateful for them than I should be, but I also know that I have some talents in greater excess than given to some fellow human beings. In other words, I know my worth, and I am not going to hide it – and I know that I have the responsibility to properly use the talents that God has given me.
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👍
 
Robertanthony said:
I can always appreciate kind-hearted people. Thanks to both of you. About the cognitive mediocrity, I think it says nicely what I’m trying to convey, but at the same time, nothing has ever hurt me more than being discarded as an idiot, so I’ve always worked extra hard to hide my shameful secret, one of the strategies to that end is to try to use the best terms to express my thoughts, people will tend to not think of someone who uses the word “propensity” as a dummy. My destiny is to try my very best to come across as reasonably intelligent, of course loneliness is the price to pay, but loneliness is way better than outright rejection.
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“He was despised and rejected, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief” but He has shown us how to triumph over adversity by his courage and nobility. Sooner or later we all have to carry our cross because we cannot avoid growing old and dying - but we can follow in His footsteps…
 
LifeIsAbsurd said:
No way! Life’s an incredible adventure. 🙂

The few times life’s been particularly trying, I asked myself what I would do if anything were permitted… and then I remembered… it is! I am a force of change in my own life, and I can remake it as I see fit, within reason.
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You are right! It doesn’t pay to be a fatalist because we’re not cogs in a machine… 🙂
 
prodigalson2011 said:
👍

This resonates with me strongly. I just returned to the Church last summer as well and I, too, had an unhealthy relationship with my father when I was young, and also became agnostic, and later an out and out atheist. It’s funny how we project our relationship with our fathers onto God.
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Not really when we remember that Jesus used “Father” to describe our relationship to God. That doesn’t mean our mother doesn’t also reflect His love but Jesus was constrained by living in a patriarchal society which would have rejected Him outright and sooner than it did if He had referred to God as our Mother… 😉
 
Robertanthony said:
Yes I do, at times more so than at other times. For me the negatives have far outweighed the positives. If that wasn’t bad enough there is always the possibility that my earthly sufferings will be magnified a zillion times and made to last forever with total constant despair as a faithful companion. I’d take non-existence any day.
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I bet there are people who are glad that you were born.

Maybe it was a random act of kindness on your part. Maybe you let a car go ahead. Maybe a person got to eat because you put some change in the Salvation Army kettle at Christmas. There are many people, whom you will never see again, who are grateful that you were born.

Blessings,
granny

Each human person is worthy of profound respect.
 
grannymh said:
I bet there are people who are glad that you were born.

Maybe it was a random act of kindness on your part. Maybe you let a car go ahead. Maybe a person got to eat because you put some change in the Salvation Army kettle at Christmas. There are many people, whom you will never see again, who are grateful that you were born.

Blessings,
granny

Each human person is worthy of profound respect.
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👍
And even if you do nothing if people see you are afflicted most of them feel grateful they are not similarly afflicted…
 
grannymh said:
I bet there are people who are glad that you were born.

Maybe it was a random act of kindness on your part. Maybe you let a car go ahead. Maybe a person got to eat because you put some change in the Salvation Army kettle at Christmas. There are many people, whom you will never see again, who are grateful that you were born.

Blessings,
granny

Each human person is worthy of profound respect.
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Posts like this make me wish CAF would adopt Facebook’s “Like” button.

🙂 Consider this liked.
 
Robertanthony said:
If you were to train someone for a simple job where few simple things had to be learnt, you’d lose patience pretty quickly if you had to repeat things over and over because it never seems to sink in. Best I can except is for people to tolerate me. Of course I as a human being have the same need for approval, recognition, friendship, bonding as the most gifted of us all, guess who will get their needs met? I resent being alive with the kind of life my cognitive mediocrity gives me access to. Can you imagine getting up everyday to be a janitor or a security guard when you could go island hopping in the Bahamas? I didn’t get the intellectual potential, I’ll gladly take the money. The world is vast, full of possibilities, ample resources to match one’s wildest dreams, fascinating people to meet, but I’m stuck in the gutter because I’m dumb.
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How can you be as dumb as you say, when your English is so clearly superior to dozens of people, including many here on this forum? “Cognitive mediocrity” sounds like a circumlocution that would proceed from mine own mouth, and I’m one of those “most talented amongst us” according to the standardized scales.

The only things I can imagine are: you either vastly underestimate yourself, or you have a learning disability that affects your ability learn repetitive tasks in some way or hinders acquisition of crystallized intelligence or some specific measure of performance ability, but doesn’t negatively affect your general fluid intelligence (in which case professionals may be able to help).
 
Seeing as I could have been aborted, but my biological mother instead placed me for adoption, I never regret having been born. My bio. mother told me about the girls from her home town who aborted around the same time she realised she was pregnant with me…

It strikes close to home for sure. Life is hard, it can get harder, but I’m glad I’m alive.
 
I have my days when I do, but more recently, those don’t happen as much as they used to. I’ve wrestled with suicidal ideations for the better part of my adolescent and adult life, but they haven’t plagued me as much recently as they have in the past, or if they come, I’m better able to push them aside.
 
Robertanthony said:
If you were to train someone for a simple job where few simple things had to be learnt, you’d lose patience pretty quickly if you had to repeat things over and over because it never seems to sink in. Best I can except is for people to tolerate me. Of course I as a human being have the same need for approval, recognition, friendship, bonding as the most gifted of us all, guess who will get their needs met? I resent being alive with the kind of life my cognitive mediocrity gives me access to. Can you imagine getting up everyday to be a janitor or a security guard when you could go island hopping in the Bahamas? I didn’t get the intellectual potential, I’ll gladly take the money. The world is vast, full of possibilities, ample resources to match one’s wildest dreams, fascinating people to meet, but I’m stuck in the gutter because I’m dumb.
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You can either grab life by the short and curlies or you can bemoan it. Im’ dyslexic. So much so I’ve been told I should be illiterate. Is it hard? Sure! Of course it is! It took me years and years and YEARS to figure out how to use the system and get around it. But I decided a long time ago that despite knwoing something wasn’t quite right in my grey matter I didn’t want some intellectually boring job. So I worked for an education.

You can too, you jsut have to want it bad enough.

And even if you do end up screwing lids on toothpaste tubes, life doesn’t revolve around your employment, get out and volunteer at a soup kitchen or an animal shelter or a pro-life centre. You don’t need an IQ of 180 to hand out pamplets to abortion minded women, or a PhD to talk to a homeless guy just wanting a hot meal.

Life is what you make it. If you regret your life, if you regret being born, the fault is not your mother’s, it’s not the world’s its your’s! So harden up, friend, get off your backside, and work to improve your lot, or the lot of others!
 
Unless God controls every movement of every person and we have no free-will, the fault of my birth is shared between my mother and my father, with incidental fault possibly imputed to those without whom it would not have been possible, such as everyone in my family line back to Adam, and everyone who was directly involved in forming their relationship (or urging them to have children, or a society that didn’t have me murdered before I gained self-awareness, if one wants to open the envelope far enough).

That gives you some practical idea of how we can all share actual guilt for Adam’s sin, as it’s the same process in reverse (and, according to the Magisterium, not sinful).

The average commentary and expository explanations of Psalm 51:7 (I believe: “For I was brought forth in sin; in sin did my mother conceive me”) strike me as very facile, as well.
 
No, but I often wish I could have been born in a different world. I don’t feel I belong to this miserable and corrupt world. Everyday I look forward to arriving in Heaven. I want to die!
 
yes, because for me the burden of life is overwhelming. i’ve been told this is suppose to be a blessing, which makes me wonder what a Creator would have against someone who is worse off. Or is it mankind’s fault that they are worse off? Then why aren’t we helping them? Why aren’t we making this world a better place? honestly, it feels that I am the only one (within my social network) who has a huge weight on my back, and would give up anything or do anything to get rid of it.

if i had the choice before being born, i would have given up my life for someone who was going to be more deserving.
 
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