Does anyone NOT cohabit?

[johntkd]

Of course not. Can’t assume the confession is intended to be invalid.

you are correct we cannot assume its invalid
but if a person feels they are forced into a confession for the example given that exactly what it would be, I need to make my posts more clear. I relize many folks wont feel “forced” into such a thing but those that DO is what I am reffering to in my response

 

[johntkd]

Two people living together is part of Marriage. If you don’t like the way your spouse lives, so much as to the extent that you would’nt marry them, then that couple is logically not ready for marriage or a relationship. But whithin the bounds of marriage; the couple has committed to one another for “better or worse and in sickness and in health”. Which is a huge life changing commitment within itself.-So to the fact that a couple is cohabitating is in a sense a product of immaturity and shows that one or both are uncommitted to the advancement of the relationship.-It’s all or nothing, I say.-They don’t call it the “Big Plunge” for nothing!

on that note many people say they want to know what the other is like all the time, I understand that “excuse” but I am here to say it still dont show you what that person is totally like anyways, many people change as “the ink dries” they feel there is no longer a need to “put on the show” etc etc

I cant say I would never move in with someone

 

[chevalier]

you are correct we cannot assume its invalid
but if a person feels they are forced into a confession for the example given that exactly what it would be, I need to make my posts more clear. I relize many folks wont feel “forced” into such a thing but those that DO is what I am reffering to in my response

It would be invalid if they didn’t regret the sins or didn’t confess them. Supposing you actually really regret and fulfil the other conditions, but are merely forced to speak your sins out, I doubt such a confession is invalid.

On the other hand, if confession is justly the prerequisite of something someone wants to achieve - or of the state of grace required - then it’s just to require confession before giving that person what he wants to achieve. The person who wants to obtain something for which he needs to go to confession, should rather abstain from it than make an invalid confession. It would be wrong to accept invalid confession from such a person, though.

In this case, we should understand that the priest told the person to make a valid confession and avoid occasion of sin for the time until the sacrament to be administered, that he didn’t just require the material set of words and gestures regardless of real intent, real regret for sins, real desire for forgiveness. We should give him the benefit of doubt.

 

[stbruno]

growthtrac.com/artman/publish/article_960.php

Wow, this subject came up at the right time. I just opened this article today from this wonderful marriage supportive website. I highly recommend it for couples who are married, contemplating marriage and those who prepare couples for marriage.

It is called “The Elephant in the Bedroom” and it talks about why people cohabitate and why it is so detrimental for their mental health and also covenant relationship.
Those who cohabitate have an 80% of divorcing.

Guess God knows what’s best…Sacramental Marriage is the best. Besides Married men live longer!

Not men who cohabitate. God is good. All the time!

PS. Who says it’s PC to cohabitate? Certainly not the one person who counts…and that’s God!

 

[MrS]

www.truemarriage.net is a helpful site to many. It was/is the project of a Law Professor at Ave Maria School of Law in Michigan. The links, and the general information are interesting from a Catholic prospective.

If you go to the “ABOUT” pulldown, you will see the purpose of this site.

.

 

[Hipster_Doofus]

Christopher West is on “Searching the Word” on Relevant Radio right now discussing cohabitation.

He made a great point. When talking to cohabitating couples who want to marry, he asks them, “Your partner has already proven to you he/she is willing to have sex outside of marriage. Now do you think he/she will change after you get married?”

 

[johntkd]

Christopher West is on “Searching the Word” on Relevant Radio right now discussing cohabitation.

He made a great point. When talking to cohabitating couples who want to marry, he asks them, “Your partner has already proven to you he/she is willing to have sex outside of marriage. Now do you think he/she will change after you get married?”

I would have responded that I also was a participnat in them same sex outside of marriage and I am willing to so yep my partner will also.I guess his point is why bother getting married
it will cause partner to cheat…

 

[AHapka]

Well, I will be one of those to admit that I did cohabit before marriage. It seemed to feel soo good and be right at the time.

But we all know how we can be tempted into doing what feels “right.” Yes, I know it was a mistake. It was a mistake because we really rushed into things. My life outside of the relationship faltered. I sacrificed doing good in school and other friendships. There was no time really getting to know one another, no excitement of slowly learing about the other person first. But there was plenty of sin

Anyway, I asked her to marry me and she said yes. I was a Catholic from birth, but who had falled away from the church years ago. So we went through marriage prep. I remember the Priest telling us that I would need to be confirmed and we would both have to go through classes.

Here’s where I have several complaints about the way marriage prep was done in this Parish looking back. No one ever mentioned repentance and confession and to stop sinning (i.e. pre-marital sex). I was confirmed without confession and in a state of mortal sin. Not even a recommendation to go (not that I’m not an adult and couldn’t do it myself, but after 10 years since last regularly being in a church, it wouldn’t have hurt to have a refresher). Then when the subject of mass attendance came up, the Priest told me that he recommened I start attending mass once a month, to get into it. So I said, what time is mass tomorrow (it was a Saturday). He said, “you don’t have to come, only if you want to.”

Well, I then got married in 1999 in a state of mortal sin. Since then I have come to truly realize what the faith is, and only in the last 2 years have I truly been faithful. I have finally went to confession and restored the state of grace I should have been in to start with. My wife has never went to confession since we met, and I don’t think she will in the near future.

I think I still would have asked her to marry me, but had we not cohabitated, it would have been a lot easier!