Does God help you decide if he is the ONE if you ask him in prayers?

[Happie07]

I have been praying to God, doing novena to St. Therese to help me decide if he is the right one for me but nothing yet. At least nothing that i can place my hands on. my biggest problem is knowing when God has answered me. Just how do i know? do i ask for a sign or what. There are many similarities that i can say we both share, but I’m scared of having a marriage where i have to endure rather than enjoy things. I have been earnestly praying to God about it. I’m going to start a new novena to St. Therese and possible St. Anthony to help intercede for me because this is the biggest decision of my life and i do want to get it right

 

[rcwitness]

Welcome to the forum! God bless
I think most of us can appreciate trying to hear God’s answers to our questions. A big part of it is looking around your daily life with your eyes open to what He may be telling you. You know, signs. He usually doesnt give us an audible voice. He speaks in the spirit.

Now, when it comes to marriage I’m of the impression that it is up to us to seek whom we desire. It is our choice. What you should be praying is that God guides you in your choice and focus more on finding the person who strengthens and draws out your faith and spirit of charity. Pray together and work together in things while asking God for His blessing in your relationship.

Peace be with you
Michael

 

[runningdude]

Welcome. I hope you find comfort.

God does not make just “ONE” soul mate for someone. There are thousands out there who would be able to love and support you.

What you should do is discern whether this man will help you grow as a person and grow closer to God. You seem to have doubts. You should examine if these doubts are well founded, or if they are “cold feet”.

Perhaps the greatest indicator is how people you know, love and trust react to this man. Do your closest friends like him? If you have a good relationship with your parents, do they like him? God message could be broadcast through them!

 

[Soren_Itenu]

Very few people are soul mated, meaning set apart for each other.

If he’s a good Catholic man and you like him, go for it!

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I have been praying to God, doing novena to St. Therese to help me decide if he is the right one for me but nothing yet. At least nothing that i can place my hands on. my biggest problem is knowing when God has answered me. Just how do i know? do i ask for a sign or what. There are many similarities that i can say we both share, but I’m scared of having a marriage where i have to endure rather than enjoy things. I have been earnestly praying to God about it. I’m going to start a new novena to St. Therese and possible St. Anthony to help intercede for me because this is the biggest decision of my life and i do want to get it right

I think you need to sit down with someone who knows you very well, and discuss this issue with them. Ask for help in discerning marriage with this man. Start with the basics. Is he a good Catholic man? Is he kind? Does he want children? Can he provide for a family? Can he be a spiritual leader for you and the children? Does he agree with the Church’s teachings, with the Magisterium? Is he a committed Catholic? Does he go to confession? Is he outspoken about his faith? How do you get along with his family? Does he get along with your family? Are you attracted to him physically? (That may not matter to some people, and to others, it’s very important.) How does he treat others when he is out with you? (Waiters, etc.) How does he handle money? Does he have any debts? What about vices? Is there any history of drug use or alcohol abuse? Does anyone in his family have an alcohol or drug problem? Any criminal background? (Don’t scoff - it’s important)

Those sorts of questions are the basis of discernment, as well as prayer, and paying attention to how good a fit the two of you are in matters of faith, work, love, and life.

 

[aspirant]

when it comes to marriage I’m of the impression that it is up to us to seek whom we desire. It is our choice. What you should be praying is that God guides you in your choice and focus more on finding the person who strengthens and draws out your faith and spirit of charity. Pray together and work together in things while asking God for His blessing in your relationship.

God does not make just “ONE” soul mate for someone… What you should do is discern whether this man will help you grow as a person and grow closer to God. You seem to have doubts. You should examine if these doubts are well founded, or if they are “cold feet”.

 

[chevalier]

Now, when it comes to marriage I’m of the impression that it is up to us to seek whom we desire. It is our choice.

There can perhaps be some kind of vocation with regard to a specific person but it’s very easy to guilt-trip oneself into marrying a person we don’t want to marry just because we think that 1) since it makes us suffer and dread and would be a huge sacrifice, then 2) it must be a sacrifice required by God, so 3) we must do it or else we’re bad people. Which is bad thinking because just because something feels dreadful doesn’t yet mean it’s a sacrifice required by God.

Welcome. I hope you find comfort.

God does not make just “ONE” soul mate for someone. There are thousands out there who would be able to love and support you.

Actually, it’s more like it can’t be proven either way. I believe that the “soulmate theory” doesn’t have a sufficient basis but there’s one type of argument that we can’t use against it, namely: any argument which is based on the idea that God doesn’t care enough about each individual human being to get involved in that one-of-a-six-billion human’s life in an intimate way. Since every hair on our head is counted, it would be unfeasible to claim that God doesn’t care whom we choose or that we choose right, or even to choose for us. On the other hand, there’s simply no concrete basis for a claim that God does actually choose someone specific in a destiny kind of way.