Does NFP really work?

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I want to know, Your age, how many kids you have, how many were planned?? Everyone I see who practices NFP has like 6-9 kids and they are only in their early 40’s. I heard the excuse “Oh well people who practice NFP are just more open to life and love kids.” I have a real hard time believing that. I would love to practice NFP, but I have a hard time believing it is affective, and if it is affective, I think human error would render it a lot less affective than it claims to be.
 
Yes, NFP really does work.

I’m sure others will add in links to statistics and such. Also, you can do a search for NFP here at CAF and I’m sure you’ll come up with literally hundreds of threads on this.

I am 32 and my husband is 33. We have three children. We started practicing the Sympto-Thermal Method of NFP about 19 months ago and have been successful in avoiding pregnancy.
 
I want to know, Your age, how many kids you have, how many were planned?? Everyone I see who practices NFP has like 6-9 kids and they are only in their early 40’s. I heard the excuse “Oh well people who practice NFP are just more open to life and love kids.” I have a real hard time believing that. I would love to practice NFP, but I have a hard time believing it is affective, and if it is affective, I think human error would render it a lot less affective than it claims to be.
Take a class.
 
Everyone I see who practices NFP has like 6-9 kids and they are only in their early 40’s.
I share your questions! At the Engaged Encounter DH and I attended, the couple leading the NFP session had 8 kids. That made me leery and scared DH to the point that he would not even consider it for us. When I have brought it up since, he still goes right back the instructors with the 8 kids and is convinced it does not work. Since the other families I know who use it also have large families, I confess to still being leery myself.
 
Yes, it is very effective BUT only if you use it accurately and very carefully. Take a class.
We were quite sloppy with our planning and ended up with four children…😛
Also works super for planning a child!
 
I want to know, Your age, how many kids you have, how many were planned??** Everyone I see who practices NFP has like 6-9 kids and they are only in their early 40’s.** I heard the excuse “Oh well people who practice NFP are just more open to life and love kids.” I have a real hard time believing that. I would love to practice NFP, but I have a hard time believing it is affective, and if it is affective, I think human error would render it a lot less affective than it claims to be.
I am in my mid to late 40’s. I have one child, who is in their teen’s. My child was planned, there have been no unplanned pregnancies.
 
I’m 36 my husband is 34. We have 4 children, the oldest was just a we’ll have sex and see what happens, our second was planned the last 2 were attempts at spacing using NFP. But hey I’ve been attacked on here for not attending a class but reading to get my instruction through books/online. (I guess that’s one way to dismiss someone that says it fails)

Anyone that you tell it fails (like I will) will get attacked for “not doing it right” because I guess some people can’t fathom that it doesn’t work 99% of the time like certain websites that shall remain nameless portray it does. :rolleyes:

Abstain that’s the only real way to avoid pregnancy. NFP is to leave life open and sometimes life happens. (I got 2 NFP beautiful babies to prove it-one of which was born on Sept. 2, 2010 and the other Dec. 31st 2011.)
 
I share your questions! At the Engaged Encounter DH and I attended, the couple leading the NFP session had 8 kids. That made me leery and scared DH to the point that he would not even consider it for us. When I have brought it up since, he still goes right back the instructors with the 8 kids and is convinced it does not work. Since the other families I know who use it also have large families, I confess to still being leery myself.
:rolleyes: I know NFP, but that doesn’t mean I practice it. When you practice NFP you have to decide what is more important in your relationship. Is avoiding a child a big enough reason to avoid sex with ones spouse? As of yet the question has been no (I have 2 kids and one on the way). This maybe isn’t a very accurate picture, after my first we practiced some NFP for a few months after the birth, but soon discovered I was still infertile, but I kept it enough to chart my cycles coming back, but then we only abstained for 2 or 3 cycles after that, and then decided that we didn’t have sufficient reason to abstain. :eek: Gasp I know, people actually deciding to let the children come as they may. *

The think is that is why some couples who practice NFP have a lot of children, they don’t see avoiding children as the goal in their state of life at that time. There are some couples here on this forum who practice NFP because of severe medical conditions and only have 1 or no children.

*Sorry for the cheek, I just get kind of tired of these threads and their lack of logic.
 
Well…for couples that can’t have kids and are under going fertility treatments the first thing the doctors tell them to do is chart…

NFP is suppose to help you space children when you have a grave reason to do so. But like all things in life you don’t have complete, flawless control over it. In other words, human error does happen. But part of being Catholic is learning to accept what life gives you. You just have to trust if God blesses you with 8 children He will also bless you with the means to care for them.

My husband and I really struggled when we were first married too. Until we were honest enough to admit it wasn’t the 8 children that scared us, it was the loss of security. Two able-bodied adults do not have a problem putting enough food on the table, roof over their heads and have enough to do fun things with…2 adults with 10 mouths to feed…that’s a different story, that’s a harder life. But no one said being Catholic is easy.
 
Early 50s. Two children. Both planned. Used NFP to space and to conceive #2. Complications with the second delivery that led to more conservative use of NFP. No problems - even through perimenopause. My mom had five - all planned. Cooincidentally, the three women in our parish who are the most vocally pro-NFP all have families with four children. 🙂
 
32 yrs old.

4 kids.

Currently using a LadyComp.

Entered into marriage wanting 3-4 kids–our exact words.

First 3 were conceived freely, knowingly. I learned NFP after the second baby. I guaranteed my husband that I was ovulating and we would FOR SURE have a third baby if we proceeded. We proceeded and viola, #3!

We fooled around during a baby-making day with #4 after almost 1.5 years of successful avoidance. So, it was kind of an “oops,” but our fault. You can’t blame the pill if you skip taking it a few days and I can’t blame NFP if we fooled around on a no-no day. But we were open to it, you know?

It’s almost been three years since I’ve had our last. We are pretty conservative with the rules now.

The strange thing is: if we believed in sterilization, DH would have a vasectomy by now–that is how “done” our family feels. But we are open to having a fifth. It doesn’t seem to make sense. We are totally done having kids. I do not want any more . . . . unless we are called to have another. I assume many NFP families understand this paradox and that’s why they may be bigger than normal.

So, for the past 6-ish years we’ve used a form of NFP and haven’t gotten pregnant unless we proceeded on a baby-making day. So far, it’s been 100% and we have the 3-4 kids we always said we’d have. (I will admit to being nervous about my cycles becoming irregular due to menopause in the future–eek!)
 
What these NFP couples are tell you about being open to life is true! On our pre-Cana weekend we saw a couple who spoke of NFP yet had 6 kids and we were like you…skeptical. Now we get it. NFP works and for us has helped us understand the beauty of being co-creators with the Father of these little souls. We have 5 children with us ages 10 to 4 months and four little ones with Jesus and Mary.

The only regrets that I have is that we didn’t trust God and contracepted early in our marriage. The pill is evil, plain and simple and the devil delights in it.

Is it easy to be faithful to God and His ways? Not always but the more you surrender your will to His the more grace you’ll receive and you can get through it. It IS worth it.

Michael
 
I want alot of children, I think it would be awesome to have like 12 kids. The problem is my mental illness (bipolar) and the meds I am on I can’t get pregnant because it could cause serious health problems for the baby. So right now we just abstain. I would just like to be able to have sex but don’t feel secure enough with NFP being safe since I can’t get pregnant on these meds, plus financial reasons and mental reasons. I have two and a half year old twins and a one year old and I am 27 so it’s just to hard right now to be open to life.
 
My wife and I are 34ish. 2 kids, originally planned for 2. Converted to the Catholic Church this Easter, decided to change from the pill to NFP to follow the CC teaching. Now we are feeling like maybe we are called to have another, but not sure. Our older is 13 and the younger is 8, but we are praying to discern if we should go for 1 more.

When we used the pill, we were not open to life. We were pretty much in control and closed to the idea. Now, we see it as an opportunity to be co-creators.

As far as if it works, this is the same method they recommend to couples who are having problems conceiving, only using it backwards. Instead of using the fertile periods, abstaining those times. Mother Theresa taught a mucous only version of NFP in India to illiterate people and their unexpected (unplanned) birth rate was approaching 0%.

To those who say the sympto- thermal method doesn’t work, it works if you use it correctly. If you choose not to abstain during certain times or if you misunderstand the chart, then guess what? Classes are a big help in reading your charts, the help doesn’t stop when the class wraps up, we still call and ask questions regarding charts.
 
I want alot of children, I think it would be awesome to have like 12 kids. The problem is my mental illness (bipolar) and the meds I am on I can’t get pregnant because it could cause serious health problems for the baby. So right now we just abstain. I would just like to be able to have sex but don’t feel secure enough with NFP being safe since I can’t get pregnant on these meds, plus financial reasons and mental reasons. I have two and a half year old twins and a one year old and I am 27 so it’s just to hard right now to be open to life.
Awwww! :hug1:

Let me take a moment to remove my foot from my mouth for that “harder life” comment I made earlier. 😊 I am so sorry that was rude and tactless of me.

I wish I had some brilliant advice to give you. But I can only think of saying try talking to your priest or the instructor. (Like you couldn’t think of that on your own!)

I’ll keep you in my prayers and good luck!
 
Awwww! :hug1:

Let me take a moment to remove my foot from my mouth for that “harder life” comment I made earlier. 😊 I am so sorry that was rude and tactless of me.

I wish I had some brilliant advice to give you. But I can only think of saying try talking to your priest or the instructor. (Like you couldn’t think of that on your own!)

I’ll keep you in my prayers and good luck!
Hey no I understand completely, I should have probably explained my reasons for asking the question so I didn’t come off like I used contraceptive or had anything against large families. I really really want a large family so much, I just am not sure it is God’s will for me, because our current struggles. I do hope things will change for us in the future because I love children, and would love nothing more than to be stable emotionally and not be on welfare and living with my parents in order that we could have more children. I just found out my friend was pregnant again, and I felt a little sad because I don’t know if it is the Lord’s will that I have a large family, (something I have always desired.) I feel strongly my circumstances are in order to lead me to a holier life, but than again, who knows the future.
 
By the way, your comment earlier wasn’t rude at all, I just read it. I completely agree that trusting in the Lord is key. Being Catholic isn’t easy, but that is a good thing because Jesus said “Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it. For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it."

So we know we are on the right path!👍
 
I want to know, Your age, how many kids you have, how many were planned?? Everyone I see who practices NFP has like 6-9 kids and they are only in their early 40’s. I heard the excuse “Oh well people who practice NFP are just more open to life and love kids.” I have a real hard time believing that. I would love to practice NFP, but I have a hard time believing it is affective, and if it is affective, I think human error would render it a lot less affective than it claims to be.
I’m 26, have no kids, and have been using NFP. We have a couple of serious reasons to avoid right now, but through NFP I have learnt to really KNOW and TRUST what my body is telling me. If I am unsure of any my signs: no sex.

Try charting for a few months to see how clear your signs are and to get a feel for it.
 
By the way, your comment earlier wasn’t rude at all, I just read it. I completely agree that trusting in the Lord is key. Being Catholic isn’t easy, but that is a good thing because Jesus said “Enter through the narrow gate; for the gate is wide and the way is broad that leads to destruction, and there are many who enter through it. For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it."

So we know we are on the right path!👍
Whew! I am glad you didn’t take offense! I really didn’t mean any at all and I’m glad you see that.

I totally understand the conflict you are describing between wanting a larger family and it not being feasible with your current situation. I always wanted a large family too and I’m in a situation where my doc has pretty much said “You cannot get preg in the next year- here have some birth control pills.” You can imagine the very fun conversation after that. I’m now that weird Catholic lady.

Oh well.
 
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