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TemplarKnight1
Guest
Does having pre-marital sex (between couples who become future spouses) “jinx” / jeopardize / give bad luck to the marriage or does it only reinforce the need for marriage between those two persons?
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VanSensei
Guest
I’m speaking as someone who was born out of wedlock. My parents waited 4 years after my birth to get hitched and they’re just fine, marriage-wise.
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Giggly_Giraffe
Guest
Pre-marital sex teaches the spirit to take rather than to give. It’s like when a person has a desire to fly an airplane. Will they take the time to follow the rules, learn how to be a good pilot, get certified … Or will they just take the plane out for a spin and then decide if they want to go through the classes.
Pre-marital sex adds pressure upon the relationship. Contraception or not, the fear of unwanted pregnancy, unwanted disease, and rejection overshadow the relationship causing hasty decisions to be made about life. Complicate this with the chemical hormone’s sex creates (dopamine & serotonin) and rational decisions (marriage, life long commitments, trust, faithfulness, fidelity) all become fogged creating blindness in long term decisions.
Yes, not all pre-marital acts end with a life changing crash ( STD’s, unwanted pregnancy, devastating heartbreak ) but why rush in when you can discern how well you work together at flying through life together?
Pre-marital sex adds pressure upon the relationship. Contraception or not, the fear of unwanted pregnancy, unwanted disease, and rejection overshadow the relationship causing hasty decisions to be made about life. Complicate this with the chemical hormone’s sex creates (dopamine & serotonin) and rational decisions (marriage, life long commitments, trust, faithfulness, fidelity) all become fogged creating blindness in long term decisions.
Yes, not all pre-marital acts end with a life changing crash ( STD’s, unwanted pregnancy, devastating heartbreak ) but why rush in when you can discern how well you work together at flying through life together?
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Non_nobis
Guest
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Giggly_Giraffe
Guest
Catholic view: The purpose of marriage is to get your spouce to heaven.
God teaches us that in marriage we are to get our spouces to heaven. Fornication (premarital sex) is a wrong-doing teaches God. Now many say, “Hey, isn’t this blind faith in God?” Which my answer is it should not be so. If you are fearing blind faith, trust, fidelity, and openness to life with God then you would probably benefit more on working on your relationship with God over dating ( for the time being ).
If you already have trust, faith, fidelity, and openness to life with God then you can examine how pre-marital sex will get your partner to heaven; knowing God says its wrong.
God teaches us that in marriage we are to get our spouces to heaven. Fornication (premarital sex) is a wrong-doing teaches God. Now many say, “Hey, isn’t this blind faith in God?” Which my answer is it should not be so. If you are fearing blind faith, trust, fidelity, and openness to life with God then you would probably benefit more on working on your relationship with God over dating ( for the time being ).
If you already have trust, faith, fidelity, and openness to life with God then you can examine how pre-marital sex will get your partner to heaven; knowing God says its wrong.
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snarflemike
Guest
Statistically such marriages fail at a greater rate than others. I’d have to hunt for the data.
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Tomster
Guest
Pre-marital sex does not jinx or give bad luck. Sacramental confession is required before the vows are exchanged.
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TimothyH
Guest
Pre-marital sex short circuits the process of getting to know one’s spouse.
It’s like eating desert before dinner. It spoily your appetite and you don’t get the proper nutrition from the meal.
We are supposed to get to know our future spouse, learn to love them for who they are, not for what they give us or do for us. Pre-marital sex obviates the need for that, puts the cart before the horse. Why get to know someone phsycologically, emotionally and intellectually if you go straight to the end game, straight to the desert?
Many people think they are in love, have sex and then get married, and never get to really know the person they marry. That’s part of the reason why so many marriages are failing.
-Tim-
It’s like eating desert before dinner. It spoily your appetite and you don’t get the proper nutrition from the meal.
We are supposed to get to know our future spouse, learn to love them for who they are, not for what they give us or do for us. Pre-marital sex obviates the need for that, puts the cart before the horse. Why get to know someone phsycologically, emotionally and intellectually if you go straight to the end game, straight to the desert?
Many people think they are in love, have sex and then get married, and never get to really know the person they marry. That’s part of the reason why so many marriages are failing.
-Tim-
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TimothyH
Guest
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TheWarriorMonk
Guest
This is a case where the question can’t answered directly, because the premarital sex is not the cause, but rather the effect.
Those having premarital sex obviously have a different moral set than those that wait. That moral set often includes not only refusing to have sex with anyone not their spouse, but a belief in the indissolubility of marriage. Obviously comparing those with entirely different moral beliefs with have very different results.
Those having premarital sex obviously have a different moral set than those that wait. That moral set often includes not only refusing to have sex with anyone not their spouse, but a belief in the indissolubility of marriage. Obviously comparing those with entirely different moral beliefs with have very different results.
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jochoa
Guest
In consideration of an unconditional commitment (marriage), sex prior to publicly declaring unconditional commitment to a person is an indicator of greater impatience. Impatience is the direct cause of disturbance (loss of peace). Therefore, the pre-marital sex is not the root cause of a more disturbed marriage, it is the lack of patience within the spouses which is the root cause of a more striven marriage.
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