Does your parish enjoy opportunities for good fellowship after Sunday Mass?

[Solomonson]

I find it sad that not all churches (Protestant and Catholic) offer fellowship opportunities after services. One of the things that drew my mom away from the Roman Catholic Church was the lack of fellowship in her home parish. People would race out of the parking lot. At my friend’s Byzantine rite church it is a different story. There is only one Sunday Mass and people linger for hours in the fellowship hall. I’ve attended their Mass & Fellowship. It’s wonderful. People that treat Church as a solo or ‘only my family’ experience are missing out on what scripture says about intentional relationships and loving those outside of our immediate family. My Protestant Church offers fellowship in the form of coffee/muffins served after services.

Byzantine Catholics celebrate the Divine Liturgies, not the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. My late Byzantine Catholic pastor was a very big supporter of “coffee socials.” He would often say “it’s not that” while pointing upstairs, “but it’s still vitally important.”

 

[magnusbar]

We have cake and coffee after Sunday mass.
I go maybe every other week.

 

[WilliamE]

We have coffee and doughnuts after Sunday Mass. Recently some of the parishioners have started to provide sandwiches, soup, snacks, etc., to go along with the the doughnuts. I’m surprised at the number of people who don’t bother to attend. I very rarely miss it.

 

[Fuerza]

They have a luncheon at my parish every Sunday after the TLM. I don’t go myself but it’s supposedly pretty well attended.

 

[pnewton]

No answer for me on the survey. Mine is very good but there is not food or formal meeting. People just hang out for a while.

 

[Anne1964]

We have coffee in between the two English Masses each Sunday and a breakfast after Thursday morning Mass. Since I work full time I have never been to the breakfast but I hear it is well attended by homeschool families.

I believe coffee is available after the second English Mass on Sunday but most people leave after that Mass. The majority of people socializing in between Masses are the families with kids in faith formation classes.

 

[Solomonson]

Well my parish has opportunities for fellowship after all morning masses, but I wouldn’t say the parish “enjoys” said opportunities since less than 3% go.

I am firmly in the camp of “I don’t personally care one way or another”. I would actually rather spend time after mass praying in the pew than socializing, but I tend to leave after the priest exits the nave to avoid the round of applause for the choir.

That is not to say that fellowship opportunities aren’t important, but rather I think it odd to want to spend time eating donuts when I have just received the Bread of Life.

Why? And it doesn’t have to be donuts…

I don’t think it’s “odd” at all wanting to spend time in fellowship with other Catholic Christians after celebrating the Mass with them.

It’s also not a zero sum game. You can spend time praying in your pew after Mass before having fellowship with others. It’s quite possible.

 

[ConfusedLucy]

We have it about once a month. It’s a bit hit and miss, last time me and my husband went no one really spoke to us. I’m trying to psych myself up for when it’s next on though.

 

[Dorothy]

Sometimes people are waiting for us to speak first to them at these gatherings. I try to remember some things to ask to “break the ice”, such as…“Are you new to this parish?”…or “Where are you from?”.
That usually starts a conversation.

 

[Phemie]

Only one Sunday Mass in my parish. On the third Sunday of the month we have a social afterwards. Usually there’s a reminder in the bulletin the week before inviting people to bring some food to share. The varieties of food available are wonderful. But if you look around you see few “established” parishioners other than the ladies who make this happen. Most of the people milling around are fairly recent arrivals in our town.

Now I didn’t grow up in a parish where “fellowship” was organized. People spent time socializing on the church steps after Mass, catching up on news. It’s still kind of like that 40 years later when I go back home on holidays. But in my various moves in the last 40 years I’ve been in all kinds of parishes. There were definitely those where everyone left right after Mass to those where a different family was responsible for coffee and cookies after Mass each Sunday and almost everyone stayed, to one where religious ed was right after Mass so, at minimum, parents stayed behind for coffee while the kids learned about the Faith.

We also have another opportunity for fellowship on the first Sunday of the month when the KofC have coffee after Mass in their hall which is next door to the church. But there again, the people who go are in 98% of cases those where the dad/husband is a Knight. I’m usually 1 of 2 or 3 who don’t have a connection with the KofC.

 

[GoGoDiego]

Nahhh

Every church in the Philippines have at least 6-10 Sunday Masses. And sometimes it happens every hour. Fellowship or anything of that sort is not carried out.

 

[Solomonson]

Nahhh

Every church in the Philippines have at least 6-10 Sunday Masses. And sometimes it happens every hour. Fellowship or anything of that sort is not carried out.

That’s very sad.

My parish is like that too. We have 6 Masses on Sundays. Not very healthy in my opinion. It was be a lot better if 3 parishes had 1-2 Masses instead.

I guess in the end, we Catholics just don’t make the monetary investments in church buildings and everything required to operate them for Masses.

 

[Kielbasi]

I guess in the end, we Catholics just don’t make the monetary investments in church buildings and everything required to operate them for Masses.

investing on new church buildings also requires being able to efficiently divest too.

communities can be redeveloped into less dense housing,industrial or offices to replace residences or demographics changing with catholics moving out and new non catholic populations moving in.

we’ve seen all of this in pittsburgh

 

[Usige]

Roughly how many attend your Masses?

There are 5 Masses each Sunday with between 300 and say 700 people per Mass. Of those that actually get donuts the vast majority do a grab and go. Depending on the Mass, there are perhaps a dozen or two that actually stay to socialize; what I assume people mean by “fellowship”.

 

[Usige]

…

It was be a lot better if 3 parishes had 1-2 Masses instead.

I guess in the end, we Catholics just don’t make the monetary investments in church buildings and everything required to operate them for Masses.

My (non-Catholic) mom, said something similar a few years back.

I don’t know about where you are, but in my area it is a lack of clergy that is the problem. My diocese only ordains one or two priests a year. We have been doing okay the last few years, but based on seminarians in the pipeline, my diocese will not ordain another priest for 3 years. We have several rural parishes where there is 1 priest managing 2 or 3 parishes.

So lets say that my parish of roughly 8,000 people is split in half. The new parish and diocese comes up with the 3-5 million to build a new church (roughly what the last 2 churches have cost in my area). They would have to take the current parochial vicar out of the parish and assign them as pastor to the new parish. That means that each of the parishes could only have 3 masses which admittedly could be more spread-out, but it would still be masses with 500-600 people. Without an increase of vocations, dumping money into more buildings will not solve whatever perceived problem you think investing in more parishes would fix.

 

[psalm90]

Our parish goes to the hall after every Sunday Mass. The keys to good fellowship is to remember to sit with people you are not familiar with. I do this by saying…“do you mind if I sit with you?” I usually have someone with me who can meet new people also. We have tables that seat six to eight people. I have gotten to meet a lot of parishioners I had never had a chance to speak to before.

This is a good thing to do, but in my parish, the people tend to group themselves with people that they are comfortable with already.

One of the best examples of “greeters” in church I saw in a local protestant church that I went to one sunday for some reason, and there were four young adult men in suits with Bibles who welcomed me at the door. But, having said that and introduced myself, one of the guys switched to talking about computers. I did not stay for the FULL free meal that was being prepared in the basement of the church. The “service” by the way consisted of a movie, because the pastor had been away at the state capital for lobbying for something or other. But, they were friendly to me when I walked in.

Typically, in any local Catholic church, the greeter is handing out song books or printed song sheets, and says nothing.

 

[ConfusedLucy]

This is a good thing to do, but in my parish, the people tend to group themselves with people that they are comfortable with already.

One of the best examples of “greeters” in church I saw in a local protestant church that I went to one sunday for some reason, and there were four young adult men in suits with Bibles who welcomed me at the door. But, having said that and introduced myself, one of the guys switched to talking about computers. I did not stay for the FULL free meal that was being prepared in the basement of the church. The “service” by the way consisted of a movie, because the pastor had been away at the state capital for lobbying for something or other. But, they were friendly to me when I walked in.

Typically, in any local Catholic church, the greeter is handing out song books or printed song sheets, and says nothing.

It does rather remind me of a school cafeteria. I wish Catholic churches had small group ministry, it can introduce you to a small number of people who you then know and it’s less intimidating than going to a big crowded room where you don’t know anyone.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

A lot of the parishes I’ve attended have had some coffee and donuts thing after at least one Mass. I rarely go. To the extent I want to say hello to anyone, I’m more of a “chat on the steps or in the parking lot” person.

I’ve hung out more with people at things like special holiday breakfasts, Lenten fish fries and pilgrimage trips. I enjoy those things when I participate, but in general I see the Church as a place for me to go pray, not a place for me to go have a social life.

 

[Solomonson]

A lot of the parishes I’ve attended have had some coffee and donuts thing after at least one Mass. I rarely go. To the extent I want to say hello to anyone, I’m more of a “chat on the steps or in the parking lot” person.

I’ve hung out more with people at things like special holiday breakfasts, Lenten fish fries and pilgrimage trips. I enjoy those things when I participate, but in general** I see the Church as a place for me to go pray, not a place for me to go have a social life.**

It’s both.

 

[Solomonson]

My (non-Catholic) mom, said something similar a few years back.

I don’t know about where you are, but in my area it is a lack of clergy that is the problem. My diocese only ordains one or two priests a year. We have been doing okay the last few years, but based on seminarians in the pipeline, my diocese will not ordain another priest for 3 years. We have several rural parishes where there is 1 priest managing 2 or 3 parishes.

So lets say that my parish of roughly 8,000 people is split in half. The new parish and diocese comes up with the 3-5 million to build a new church (roughly what the last 2 churches have cost in my area). They would have to take the current parochial vicar out of the parish and assign them as pastor to the new parish. That means that each of the parishes could only have 3 masses which admittedly could be more spread-out, but it would still be masses with 500-600 people. Without an increase of vocations, dumping money into more buildings will not solve whatever perceived problem you think investing in more parishes would fix.

Here is what I actually posted (emphasis added):

That’s very sad.

My parish is like that too. We have 6 Masses on Sundays. Not very healthy in my opinion. It was be a lot better if 3 parishes had 1-2 Masses instead.

I guess in the end, we Catholics just don’t make the monetary investments in church buildings and everything required to operate them for Masses.

That includes priests. Even when there was an abundance of priests in decades past, the Church often operated parish churches that offered several Masses each Sunday. That’s not healthy.

Again, I suspect that’s been the case because Catholics as a whole do not give as their Protestant brethren do.

Up until a few years ago my parish had a retired senior priest in residence. During his tenure as pastor, he turned down a lot of offers of free land in which to build new parishes. His attitude until he passed was to simply add more Masses to the schedule.

Today that land would be a godsend, but it has all been developed. I’m not sure what caused the mindset exhibited by that senior priest, but it didn’t appear to be healthy.