Does your parish have a welcoming committee?

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Arebella

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I’m just curious about this as my husband and I recently joined a new parish. A few years ago, we bought rural acreage and built a new home near a small town. For a couple of years, we drove to our old parish, which was in a suburb outside a large city. That parish had a committee of members who made a point of formally welcoming new members into the parish family with a luncheon and a home visit or call from the parish priest and deacon. That was a very large parish but yet the priest and some of the long-time members made welcoming new parishioners a priority. Everyone was made to feel welcome and connected. I think that’s very important to the lifeblood of any parish.

My new parish is very close-knit because it is very rural and most of the members are from farm families who have been parishioners for generations. They all seem to have known each other for years, and they do not seem to take any interest in getting to know any newcomers. They are certainly polite, but there is no welcoming committee of any kind and outside of one mention in a bulletin of a monthly blurb about new members, there has been no attempt by the priest or anyone to connect with us and we don’t know anyone else in this parish to ask. We have no children, and are working professionals, so we’re kind of a “different” type of family than they are used to being around, but would really like to get to know and make friends with other members. Even the pastor here seems a bit shy and not very talkative, although he also seems quite caring and sincere.

So…I am seriously thinking of calling the pastor and setting up a little meeting to ask about organizing a welcoming committee of some type. I was thinking along the lines of getting some of the members to form a group to contact new members, inviting them to a social event of some kind - maybe a Sunday luncheon after the last mass, or a potluck of some kind. There also seems to be a dearth of social events in this parish, so that might also help with some opportunity for those things too. How does your parish welcome new members?
 
I can relate.

My old parish had over 7K families and had welcome tables, welcome committees, etc.

My “new” parish (12 years) is small, rural, less than 70 families. We don’t have a welcome committee, but to be fair we’ve had about 4-6 new families in 12 years that I’ve been here. And a couple of those were people moving back to the area.

Because we have so few new people, there isn’t a real “need” for a formal welcome committee. But we do have coffee & donuts on the first Sunday and ask for volunteers to get involved with things. It makes it more difficult b/c our pastor covers 3 parishes and so we don’t have activities going on at the parish during the week other than religious education for the kids during the school year.

It’s tough being in a rural parish and all I can say is to join in as best you can, volunteer, and certainly if you have ideas and want to start something new, bring them to the pastor. Join the ladies group/altar society if there is one.
 
I will also give my observation that it doesn’t matter how big/small your parish is, about 10% o the people are doing all the work.

In my 7k parish, it was the same old story of trying to get religious ed teachers, volunteers to do whatever. In my tiny parish== same thing.
 
1ke said:
I will also give my observation that it doesn’t matter how big/small your parish is, about 10% o the people are doing all the work.

In my 7k parish, it was the same old story of trying to get religious ed teachers, volunteers to do whatever. In my tiny parish== same thing.
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Same at our 600 family parish.

I mentioned my disappointment in the participation level at our parish to Father C one time. His answer: “Well, you have dedicated Catholics, then you have 50-50 Catholics. Unfortunately, the 50-50 outnumber the dedicated.” 😦
 
Yes, our Legion of Mary members make up “Welcome to our Parish” gift bags. The gift bags contain a Rosary made by our members, a bottle of Holy Water, a Parish Bulletin, Pieta Prayer Book, Legion of Mary prayers & a welcoming letter from our Pastor. The Legionnaires go to the new Parishioner’s home with the gift bag.
 
I don’t know. Our Parish is quite small, I think it’s like 1k families? Though when I first inquired joining I got a call back from a priest who offered to meet me. I ended up just going down to the church to check everything out and we met there after I saw a week day mass. As far as I’m aware there is no official welcoming committee…I sort of had to make myself welcome. I kind of like to keep to myself anyways.
 
asia53 said:
Same at our 600 family parish.

I mentioned my disappointment in the participation level at our parish to Father C one time. His answer: “Well, you have dedicated Catholics, then you have 50-50 Catholics. Unfortunately, the 50-50 outnumber the dedicated.” 😦
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It also depends on the social atmosphere. When I first joined the parish I was a regular mass goer, I’d go about 3 times a week and not miss sunday mass. I wanted to volunteer and do everything I possibly could to help, as I work from home basically and have a lot of free time. I took a volunteer position, and became engaged in other aspects of the parish but it was the bad attitude and gossip that drove me away. I tend to be one of those people that is easy to talk to, and I guess with that comes the downside of people approaching you more showing their true colors. After realizing the kind of people involved there, I just dropped out and changed my mass routine to avoid them. It sounds harsh, but I have no time or tolerance for rude people, gossips, racists, or anything else of the sort. I still desperately want to volunteer somehow, and do something…anything…but I don’t know what I could do. I have thought about going to another parish as well…but that’s a difficult thing to do.
 
Arebella said:
I’m just curious about this as my husband and I recently joined a new parish. A few years ago, we bought rural acreage and built a new home near a small town. For a couple of years, we drove to our old parish, which was in a suburb outside a large city. That parish had a committee of members who made a point of formally welcoming new members into the parish family with a luncheon and a home visit or call from the parish priest and deacon. That was a very large parish but yet the priest and some of the long-time members made welcoming new parishioners a priority. Everyone was made to feel welcome and connected. I think that’s very important to the lifeblood of any parish.

My new parish is very close-knit because it is very rural and most of the members are from farm families who have been parishioners for generations. They all seem to have known each other for years, and they do not seem to take any interest in getting to know any newcomers. They are certainly polite, but there is no welcoming committee of any kind and outside of one mention in a bulletin of a monthly blurb about new members, there has been no attempt by the priest or anyone to connect with us and we don’t know anyone else in this parish to ask. We have no children, and are working professionals, so we’re kind of a “different” type of family than they are used to being around, but would really like to get to know and make friends with other members. Even the pastor here seems a bit shy and not very talkative, although he also seems quite caring and sincere.

So…I am seriously thinking of calling the pastor and setting up a little meeting to ask about organizing a welcoming committee of some type. I was thinking along the lines of getting some of the members to form a group to contact new members, inviting them to a social event of some kind - maybe a Sunday luncheon after the last mass, or a potluck of some kind. There also seems to be a dearth of social events in this parish, so that might also help with some opportunity for those things too. How does your parish welcome new members?
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On the first Tuesday of the month, our pastor arranges a little reception in the rectory and personally invites all newly registered members. The deacons are there and it is an opportunity for everyone to get together and share stories and answer questions. Since you are in a small, rural parish and there won’t be many new comers, maybe you could organize some in the line of evangelization?
 
It is tough to join a parish like that. Do know that if you say anything to the pastor, he may “volunteer” you to spearhead an initiative.
I’ve been in similar parishes. It’s a great example of the social fabric, as it existed for the last few hundred years in a lot of places, but now seems to only exist in some rural / small town places. It’s very hard to join an existing fabric like that! All those people know each other, are related to each other, went to school together, etc. They may see you as a “flash in the pan”, and that it may not be worth getting to know you, because you may leave in a few years! : )
Honestly, you may not want to expect too much from the people in this parish. You may be better off to seek friends through some other group. I think that in the parishes I have been in that are like this, they have enough social events that are through extended family, that they may not want to initiate anything through church.
There may be others that feel like you, though - - it’s worth a try to start a social committee or something!
 
I don’t think mine does. Then again, we joined so long ago that I don’t remember. I’d hate for there to be one, though. Years ago, in college, for my Comparative Religions course, I had to attend some kind of service other than my own, so my mom and I went to an independent Baptist church, because it was close by (I would have loved to have gone to a service of an entirely different religion, but, sadly, there are none in my area). The pastor (who wasn’t very good at effective speaking, honestly) walked over to welcome us. Then, after we left the parking lot, a parishioner ran over to shake our hands (and I’m not a hand-shaker) and welcome us. Later, for at least the next few months, we got the church’s newspaper/bulletin in the mail, despite the fact that we never gave them our home address, which means someone in the congregation recognized us and discovered our address somehow (either by checking the phone book or following us home). Totally creepy.

So, no, I don’t want random strangers welcoming me to the parish. It’s uncomfortable enough when I get called out by random strangers that recognize me from work.
 
Catholic1954 said:
On the first Tuesday of the month, our pastor arranges a little reception in the rectory and personally invites all newly registered members. The deacons are there and it is an opportunity for everyone to get together and share stories and answer questions. Since you are in a small, rural parish and there won’t be many new comers, maybe you could organize some in the line of evangelization?
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Once a month there is parish registration at the church after all Masses and a welcoming committee is there. I believe they give out booklets with parish info, etc. A picture is taken of the person or family and each month the pictures are posted on the bulletin board in the gathering space and their names are published in the bulletin. I believe a reception is held for new members at intervals in the rectory, but I’m not sure about that. We are a Stewardship Parish, so a Stewardship booklet is provided and people are encouraged to join a ministry.

Over the past few years we have had a lot of new parishioners because the Diocese was restructured and churches were closed or merged. Some of these churches were ethnic parishes people were attached to, but whose numbers have declined. So many of these people lived in our parish boundaries but went to the ethnic churches, but since closure they have joined our parish. For the most part their response has been very positive about the parish and being made to feel welcome, according to the Pastor.
 
Tuxedo_Mark said:
I don’t think mine does. Then again, we joined so long ago that I don’t remember. I’d hate for there to be one, though. Years ago, in college, for my Comparative Religions course, I had to attend some kind of service other than my own, so my mom and I went to an independent Baptist church, because it was close by (I would have loved to have gone to a service of an entirely different religion, but, sadly, there are none in my area). The pastor (who wasn’t very good at effective speaking, honestly) walked over to welcome us. Then, after we left the parking lot, a parishioner ran over to shake our hands (and I’m not a hand-shaker) and welcome us. Later, for at least the next few months, we got the church’s newspaper/bulletin in the mail, despite the fact that we never gave them our home address, which means someone in the congregation recognized us and discovered our address somehow (either by checking the phone book or following us home). Totally creepy.

So, no, I don’t want random strangers welcoming me to the parish. It’s uncomfortable enough when I get called out by random strangers that recognize me from work.
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I hope you’re being serious, because before you posted I thought that I was the only one who felt this way. I chose my last parish for 2 reasons: They had a sung Latin NO every Sunday, and it was so large and impersonal that I wasn’t expected to socialize. I recently switched to a TLM parish that I’ve been attending on and off for quite some time. It’s also large, though they do have a luncheon after the Latin Mass every week. I haven’t gone yet and probably won’t. I’m just not big on people’s trying to make me feel “welcome”. I prefer to be invisible.
 
Fuerza said:
I prefer to be invisible.
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Same. 🙂 I also get weirded out when, at work, a customer will say “See you at church.” I’ll be thinking “WTF?!” It’ll turn out that the person sits a few rows behind me. And they recognize me. Even though I have no interaction with them. At all. I must have some kind of reputation as “that one young guy at church”.
 
tawny said:
Yes, our Legion of Mary members make up “Welcome to our Parish” gift bags. The gift bags contain a Rosary made by our members, a bottle of Holy Water, a Parish Bulletin, Pieta Prayer Book, Legion of Mary prayers & a welcoming letter from our Pastor. The Legionnaires go to the new Parishioner’s home with the gift bag.
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That’s very thoughtful! 👍
 
No welcoming committee at my parish, but it’s a small parish and the pastor does make a point of knowing who everyone is.
 
I don’t know about a welcoming committee, but I just started attending a new parish for the sake of RCIA and the priest took it upon himself to personally call me and tell me how excited he was that I was joining and how much he looked forward to getting to know me. He also told me he was praying for me. I think that’s wonderful. It really touched my heart and made me feel welcome there. I think some form of special effort to welcome new parishioners is a good idea in any church.
 
I’ve never attended a parish with a welcoming committee but it does sound like a good idea. I’ve never managed to integrate myself into a parish so not sure what to advise but it sounds like you have some good ideas and I wish you luck.
 
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