Dog issue

[eucharisteo]

about 2 years ago we were coming home from vacation. We stopped at my stepmom’s place and she kept trying to give us a puppy. I say absolutely not. We don’t have time for it and if we get it I’ll be the one taking care of it and cleaning up the messes. I didn’t want the poop all over the house along with the messes the cats made. After another 6 months I finally kicked the cats out the house, which I didn’t want in the first place for similar reasons. I allowed allowed the cats for my wife and children but had no idea just how much of a mess they’d make the house. Poop and urine is everywhere and out of control. I said not to the cat at least 4 or 5 times within the course of that afternoon, each time reciting why. Each time she would beg me even more. So I finally caved, reluctant and said only if you clean the messes, because I don’t have time for it. They agreed. But something told me no. But they said they’d clean it each time. I told them I don’t want to live in animal manure and urine. I can’t stand it and it really makes me very angry, angry enough to not only get rid of the thing but to a point of so much anger I feel enraged. I have no idea why if affects me so.

This is going on 2 years of training and this dumb dog still poops in my children’s room which makes me want to do away with it for good. I’ve fought off the rage to get rid of it to keep peace in the family. I’ve threatened to follow up on my before accepting the animal threat to droop it off somewhere, legal. But they whine and whine and whine and I cave. We already need a new floor in our 2700 foot house because they’ve messed in the closets and every room in the house. We are NOT independently wealthy and I don’t know anyone sane that would put up with this for so long.

WHAT SHOULD I DO? This is rediculous. I feel like my marriage is on the line and my relationship with my children is also on the line.

 

[Sparki777]

Oh, for pete’s sake,

Dogs (and cats) need to be TRAINED. If you can’t bring yourself to check a book out of the library on how to train a dog, read it and follow the instructions, then take it to a professional trainer ($$$) who will teach you or your wife to be the dog’s master. If you can’t be bothered to train the dog, then give it to somebody who will treat the animal humanely and train it correctly.

The only reason this dog pees or poops in your house is because the adults have let it. (Children cannot be blamed for such a thing.)

 

[mommamaree]

I think you are right to want to get rid of the dog. It does not sound like it will ever be house trained, and pooping in the children’s bedrooms is a significant health hazard for the whole family. If it were me, I would take the animal to a no-kill shelter, and stand firm for when your family gets upset. You have a right to not have an animal destroy your home and endanger your health. You also have the wisdom that children do not possess to know when a situation is getting out of hand. Any animals that cannot be properly housebroken would most likely be happier on a farm or ranch.
I once had a cat that would poop in my laundry and pee in every corner. I couldn’t handle it anymore, even though I adored the poor beast. I ended up finding a nice home for him with a family who wanted a barn cat, and years later, they tell me he is just as happy as a lark being an outdoor cat (and we live in the Deep South, where it gets really hot). Some animals are just not meant to be indoor animals, and require the freedom that outdoor life offers.
Good luck with your family.

 

[kage_ar]

Dogs are easy to train.

Go get a book and a crate and start training the dog today.

When you took the dog, you took on the responsibility.

If you don’t want to housebreak the dog, then, have it put down or give it to a shelter.

 

[crazzeto]

Step 1, take a breath and slow down… Dog’s don’t have our intellect, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be trained. I’m on puppy #2 right now who is 3 months (puppy #1 is 1yr). It’s taken most of the 3 months the cute little guy has been in my home, but finally both dogs pee and poo outside more often than not (little guy still has accidents).

What has worked for me is the following. When it pee’s or poo’s inside you punish it… Typically I give the little guy a bit of a spanking. I know not everyone thinks that’s the best thing, but he seems to understand this very very well. Now you don’t have to smack the dog very hard at all for it to be effective, trust me… In fact I’m not even sure that I’m even physically hurting the dog when I spank it, it’s more psychological for the dog than anything else. I typically smack the bottom, but light smacks on the snout work too.

Then you immediatly take the dog outside (with a treat in your pocket), dont’ let him go inside until he’s done at least some business outside. When he does you praise him, and give him the treat.

Do this only if you catch him in the act, if you don’t you best let it go and get over your anger. There just isn’t a lot you can do about it if you aren’t around to know when they did it.

Now it’s also important to note, that good potty behaviour ties into general discipline of the dog. So here are some more things to do (consitantly).

When you feed the dog, do not let him eat untill you give him permission. Food is a gigantic source of perceeved control, if the dog eats when it pleases, he’s in charge, if you make him wait you’re in control. This is easy with my puppy, as I’m putting the food dish down he’ll typcially make a run for it before it’s out of my hand. I just pull it back up and tell him to wait. I repeat until he sits patiently in front of the food for a few seconds before I tell him “done”.

Do not ever let him step on your foot, this is a dog “power play”. If you tolorate him stepping on your foot, you’re telling him he’s in charge. When he does this, pull away your foot, make him sit, and (lightly) step on his paw. He will try to pull away, tell him “no, sit” and keep doing this until he tolorates you stepping on his paw.

Good luck

 

[crazzeto]

Dogs are easy to train.

Go get a book and a crate and start training the dog today.

When you took the dog, you took on the responsibility.

If you don’t want to housebreak the dog, then, have it put down or give it to a shelter.

Ack!!! Don’t put it down because you don’t want to train it!!! Give it to a good home!

 

[Sparki777]

DON’T HIT YOUR DOG. Even if it’s just a “little spanking.” Dogs aren’t humans; they can’t delineate between a “little” physical attack and a serious one. Hitting a dog will encourage violence in the animal.

 

[Rence]

about 2 years ago we were coming home from vacation. We stopped at my stepmom’s place and she kept trying to give us a puppy. I say absolutely not. We don’t have time for it and if we get it I’ll be the one taking care of it and cleaning up the messes. I didn’t want the poop all over the house along with the messes the cats made. After another 6 months I finally kicked the cats out the house, which I didn’t want in the first place for similar reasons. I allowed allowed the cats for my wife and children but had no idea just how much of a mess they’d make the house. Poop and urine is everywhere and out of control. I said not to the cat at least 4 or 5 times within the course of that afternoon, each time reciting why. Each time she would beg me even more. So I finally caved, reluctant and said only if you clean the messes, because I don’t have time for it. They agreed. But something told me no. But they said they’d clean it each time. I told them I don’t want to live in animal manure and urine. I can’t stand it and it really makes me very angry, angry enough to not only get rid of the thing but to a point of so much anger I feel enraged. I have no idea why if affects me so.

Uh, look, I have four large dogs living in my house and it would enrage me if there was any dog feces or urine in my house. And I don’t wonder why it effects me that way, I would wonder if it wouldn’t. Your cats are defecating all over your house because their litter box is dirty. But that’s irrelevent, I am a huge animal lover, and I say, if you don’t want the dogs, cats, gerbils, whatever, and no one is taking care of them, you shouldn’t have to live with them. There is no reason in the world why you have to live in that muck. I admit, I have to vaccuum every day, but there is no way in the world I’d live with a dog that would have “accidents” in the house. Again, I admit, the puppy stage is difficult, but it sounds like it’s never being resolved at your house. And I understand completely about your aversion to the cats. Them them that you live there too, and they can’t have them. It’s as simple as that: if they can’t take care of them, and your house is full of filth, I don’t understand why you didn’t put your foot down sooner

This is going on 2 years of training and this dumb dog still poops in my children’s room

Unacceptable!

which makes me want to do away with it for good. I’ve fought off the rage to get rid of it to keep peace in the family. I’ve threatened to follow up on my before accepting the animal threat to droop it off somewhere, legal. But they whine and whine and whine and I cave. We already need a new floor in our 2700 foot house because they’ve messed in the closets and every room in the house. We are NOT independently wealthy and I don’t know anyone sane that would put up with this for so long.

WHAT SHOULD I DO? This is rediculous. I feel like my marriage is on the line and my relationship with my children is also on the line.

**Tell them the dog has to go. Find another home for it. They’ve already been given their chances. There is no reason to subject you to the filth and destruction of your home like you are describing. Good luck! This coming from the girl who WON’T live without her dogs. No poop.

What about the dog living outside? What kind of dog is it? Do you have an enclosed yard? My fifth dog lives outside year round, no acceptions, never in the house ever. She loves it and she’s worth her weight in gold. That’s the only way I’d allow them to keep their animals if they’re not keeping the house clean. **

 

[Rence]

Oh, for pete’s sake,

Dogs (and cats) need to be TRAINED. If you can’t bring yourself to check a book out of the library on how to train a dog, read it and follow the instructions, then take it to a professional trainer ($$$) who will teach you or your wife to be the dog’s master. If you can’t be bothered to train the dog, then give it to somebody who will treat the animal humanely and train it correctly.

The only reason this dog pees or poops in your house is because the adults have let it. (Children cannot be blamed for such a thing.)

Sparki, I agree that dogs simply need to be trained. The crate training method works very well with me, and doesn’t last long at all. But the problem is, it’s not his responsibility to do this. Whoever wanted the pets needs to step up to the plate. It’s not fair to impose this responsibility on him. Perhaps they should find proper homes for the dogs/cats and in the future, when the kids can be more responsible, they can try again. I LOVE my dogs, but they’re my responsibility. You can’t in good conscience make taking care of pets someone else’s responsiblity.

 

[Rence]

Step 1, take a breath and slow down… Dog’s don’t have our intellect, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be trained. I’m on puppy #2 right now who is 3 months (puppy #1 is 1yr). It’s taken most of the 3 months the cute little guy has been in my home, but finally both dogs pee and poo outside more often than not (little guy still has accidents).

What has worked for me is the following. When it pee’s or poo’s inside you punish it… Typically I give the little guy a bit of a spanking. I know not everyone thinks that’s the best thing, but he seems to understand this very very well. Now you don’t have to smack the dog very hard at all for it to be effective, trust me… In fact I’m not even sure that I’m even physically hurting the dog when I spank it, it’s more psychological for the dog than anything else. I typically smack the bottom, but light smacks on the snout work too.

I don’t agree with that, and I’ve trained many dogs. Crate training works really well: Put the dog in a crate that is only big enough for him to stand and walk around in. Dogs do not dirty their sleeping area. Keep him in the crate for two hour intervals (longer at night) and bring him directly outside to relieve himself. Don’t play with him until he does. When he finally does, play for 15-20 and back to the crate. don’t let the dog roam around in your house unless you’re right there on top of him. when he moves to relieve himself, shout NO! Outside! and bring him outside. He’ll learn believe me. Dog’s don’t understand hitting, they just understand you’re angry and hitting them. They don’t get why.

Then you immediatly take the dog outside (with a treat in your pocket), dont’ let him go inside until he’s done at least some business outside. When he does you praise him, and give him the treat.

Do this only if you catch him in the act, if you don’t you best let it go and get over your anger. There just isn’t a lot you can do about it if you aren’t around to know when they did it.

**Yup, if you aern’t watching him and he has an accident, let it go. They have 30 second attention spans anyway. You have to catch them in the act. But I wouldn’t hit him…it works much better for me to just bring him outside at regular intervals, and when you think he has to go (doing the I-gotta-go-dance). **

 

[juliamajor]

Unlike what other people seem to think -dogs are dumb animals and humans arent. So you’re punishing a poor animal who looks to you by tossing him out? Because someone is too lazy or doesn’t give a damn to train the poor animal? How about getting rid of the human who has no sense of responsiblity? Can’t do that so the animal has to get the lousy end of the dog bone. Humans have a direct influence on the behavior of their animals.Dogs are poopy?Look to a human to find out why! Your cats pooping and peeing everywhere can becaused by illness in the cat-or the cat is uncomfortable for some reason or the litter box is dirty.All these are highly fixable.If you want to.But it takes time and care.If you or your family don’t have that kind of committtment then don’t have animals.It is unfair for you to adopt them and then dump them.It is cruel.Believe it or not they have abandonment issues and suffer from anxiety just like people.Animals suffer and respond with feelings to thie situations.If you really want to bekind give your animals to people who really care.

 

[jjbulano]

I think there is a much bigger problem here, and that is the anger management issue. Yes, an untrained animal is a problem, but the rage you have expressed is not warranted for this problem. And your wife and children apparently don’t respect your authority as the head of the house or the dog would be trained and there would be harmony in the home. If your rage is barely contained, then you need to seek help to find out why you are so angry before you do irreparable harm to the dog or your family or both. Actually, it might be for the best if you take the dog to a no-kill shelter before something terribly bad happens (killing a domesticated animal in anger in most states is a felony).

 

[eucharisteo]

Dogs are easy to train.

Go get a book and a crate and start training the dog today.

When you took the dog, you took on the responsibility.

If you don’t want to housebreak the dog, then, have it put down or give it to a shelter.

I gave the wife the ultimatum…take care of it or it goes. No excuses. I really don’t have time to do this. It poops randomly. I’ve trained other dogs with ease in the past. But none of them ever did this before. I was told that Dodsons are like that, whether true of not. But even though I’ve been working with the dog, it must be the dimmest dog I’ve ever known.

Those of you who blame me for folding, shame on you. I never wanted the dog because I already knew I didn’t have time for it. Cancer, CMTC, anti-Catholic family, over worked wife and myself. We had so much going I was on the verge of a breakdown myself and after missing work so much from the kids getting sick left and right I just had it and quit. I’m still trying to catch up with how far behind we’ve gotten. Last week the dog broke out in diarrhea, which is now in every room in the house.

And “for Pete’s sake” leave him out of it. He never had anything to do with it. I’m fishing for reactions and so far I’m on target with the uncharitable types that love to slam men, not knowing their backgrounds or what their dealing with.

That’s the other issue with the yard. I live on the side of a ridge and putting a fence is not possible without spending the $15 to $20K needed to fix the grading and terracing. The back of our 130 deep lot is almost at the peak of my roof. While standing in the back I can look over our 2 story house. I wish and have been working towards this. I haven’t put my foot down hard because of my wife… She’s worst than the kids. My marriage comes first, and she needs help and a serious priority check.

 

[Sparki777]

Sparki, I agree that dogs simply need to be trained. The crate training method works very well with me, and doesn’t last long at all. But the problem is, it’s not his responsibility to do this. Whoever wanted the pets needs to step up to the plate. It’s not fair to impose this responsibility on him.

Well, children can’t be responsible. And I did say he or his wife should do it or give the dog away. He’s the one who caves in, so he need to admit that he is partially responsible for the dog being in the household at all. If he continues to cave (keep the dog) and his wife refuses to be responsible for training the dog, then training it himself is a viable option.

It’s bad for the dog AND the household for everybody to shirk responsibility for this pet. If he’s the only one who wants to fix the problem, he needs to either train the dog himself or give it to somebody who will.

 

[eucharisteo]

The other thing that ticks me off is when I approach it to pick her up to place her in her kennel, she wets all over our carpet. The carpet is ruined and I’m looking at putting Pergo flooring down with area carpets instead. This would help with the mess. I know how to train a dog. But if you get a teen who is too lazy to follow through with proper caring it just ruins all the training. My wife would seem lazy if I explained what she does. But she wakes up at 5:30 every morning and gets home by 5:00 to start working on lesson plans as an English teacher. I’m trying to make it work but every time I find poop, even though I place the dog outside about every 2 hours now that I’m home it still continues. I’m just so ticked off about it.

And for you PETA folks. Dogs are animals, not humans. Get over it. Anyway it’s not in my personality to put it down. I would find her a good home. The last couple of dogs we had just bit the children in the daycare so we had to get rid of them for everybody’s sake…lawsuits. The kids were driving the dogs crazy. Well the first was our first baby and then we actually had a child, which turned our world upside down.

 

[eucharisteo]

Sparki, I agree that dogs simply need to be trained. The crate training method works very well with me, and doesn’t last long at all. But the problem is, it’s not his responsibility to do this. Whoever wanted the pets needs to step up to the plate. It’s not fair to impose this responsibility on him. Perhaps they should find proper homes for the dogs/cats and in the future, when the kids can be more responsible, they can try again. I LOVE my dogs, but they’re my responsibility. You can’t in good conscience make taking care of pets someone else’s responsibility.

Thank you for standing up for me. But the cats are now outside. I let the cats outside against everyone’s will and it’s worked out fine. Only we had to rethink some of the outside issues with feeding. I believe all the cats in the neighborhood were beginning to hand out. One of the cats disappeared. We were afraid to put them out at first because of the wild animals in our neighborhood…right next to a protected wild life refuge. Bob Cats and Coyotes. lots of stories. We worry about the dog and haven’t made outside permanent because of the house lot terrain issues.

I’m working on cleaning up everything but am overwhelmed even after being home. My wife was never the organized type, which has been the source of too many arguments, so I’ve learned to “let go” even though it doesn’t sound good to others, it does save our marriage.

 

[eucharisteo]

Well,** children can’t be responsible**. And I did say he or his wife should do it or give the dog away. He’s the one who caves in, so he need to admit that he is partially responsible for the dog being in the household at all. If he continues to cave (keep the dog) and his wife refuses to be responsible for training the dog, then training it himself is a viable option.

It’s bad for the dog AND the household for everybody to shirk responsibility for this pet. If he’s the only one who wants to fix the problem, he needs to either train the dog himself or give it to somebody who will.

It is erronious to actually believe you can trust a child to take care of an animal. That’s why I made it clear to my wife that if we got this thing that I don’t have time for it has to go. She resisted so hard, more than my teen boy who would love to see it go now for the same reasons, that I just let it go. I predicted exactly what would happen. I was working lots of overtime at work and under new management was under huge new policies with all of our jobs on hand. Now that she’s teaching she doesn’t have any time to do all the things she committed to. She would most likely hold a grudge if I just got rid of the dog without her true consent…not empty consent - if you know what I mean. I’m sorry ladies, but many of you hold grudges longer than men.

Whether you realize it or not I really wasn’t given a real chance to say no. I said it that way to just talk about it. My wife has been going through a series of serious breakdowns and I try not to conflict with her too much. It was plausible to say you take care or she goes. All of the animals in our house, children and wife, are messy. I’m the clean one…organization freak. I have to fight my natural urges to organize everything because it irritates my wife enough to make her shut me off. If you like I can start beating her to make you happy just to create a happy dog home.

BTW: my wife and I do not agree on the proper way to raise children all the time. But I think I’m right. But without her support it sends out the wrong message to the children. Whether you realize it or not marriage is a 100% commitment from both sides. I didn’t marry her to become her daddy. So rather than uselessly argue I let it go. Not cave in. None of this hasn’t gone without serious discussion. But if she doesn’t get a grip she could lose more than she bargained for. She has to be the one that makes the choice, for our sake. She’s threatened to leave me over much less many times. I believe it’s abusive, but then I wouldn’t be a good husband if I didn’t stick by her.

 

[jjbulano]

Eucharisteo – I am terribly sorry for the health issues, etc., in your life. And to have such an uncaring and selfish family doubles your burdens. Maybe ALL of you need to sit down with your Pastor or another trained counselor and get to the bottom of these issues. The dog is only a symptom of much bigger problems. Obviously, you can’t do everything, but for some reason your family is under the impression you can and you should. And I wasn’t “male” bashing, just stating my observations based on the information YOU gave. Men should lead their families – they should take their cues from you. If you are strong, compassionate and fair then it is easy to lead by example – not just in your faith life, but your everyday life. Please, take care of yourself – get whatever help you and your family need to resolve these issues and bring respect, love and peace into your home.

 

[purplesunshine]

I’m not sure about dotsons but the dog should be able to hold it’s goods during the work day. Get a crate just big enough for the dog to turn around.

You get up take dog out of crate. Take it for a run make sure it urinates/defecates. Then leave it outside on a run/kennel until you go to work. It’s back in the crate UNTIL YOU ARE HOME. For a while this is the rule. If you have to padlock the the cage do it.

When you get home do the same routine. Leave dog out until bedtime. Then give it a short walk or run, make sure that it has time to go if he needs to.

Keep this as a rule for atleast two weeks, if not month. After atleast a month the dog can get 30 minutes of “free” run of the kitchen.

If wife and kids don’t want responsibility then they don’t get the pleasure, either.

 

[eucharisteo]

Eucharisteo – I am terribly sorry for the health issues, etc., in your life. And to have such an uncaring and selfish family doubles your burdens. Maybe ALL of you need to sit down with your Pastor or another trained counselor and get to the bottom of these issues. The dog is only a symptom of much bigger problems. Obviously, you can’t do everything, but for some reason your family is under the impression you can and you should. And I wasn’t “male” bashing, just stating my observations based on the information YOU gave. Men should lead their families – they should take their cues from you. If you are strong, compassionate and fair then it is easy to lead by example – not just in your faith life, but your everyday life. Please, take care of yourself – get whatever help you and your family need to resolve these issues and bring respect, love and peace into your home.

I realize this and the pastor agrees with me, but she’s a convert and has pastor issues from her past so I leave him out of it for her sake. Trust is more important than my sanity. Those that have read my pasts way back know the issue with my wife as a victim of a series of violent crimes and difficult life of a elder’s daughter. Her animals have been her escape. The rest of your post insinuates that I don’t know how to lead a family. Embarrassed for you. It’s sad that people don’t understand that not everybody grows up in “Leave it to Beaver” homes. If I put my foot down, like I have in the past, serious anxieties kick in and the vibrating wife crawls to bed and leave us. Not a good idea. Be careful the advice you give when dealing with what you perceive as “abuse”. You never know.