Doing God's work

[cviolette]

I am struggling with doing God’s work and feeling burnt out and used. I feel strongly that God wants me helping the sick but am unsure whether I am following his plan and not mine.

I am currently going to school for nursing and working as a nursing assistant in a traumatic brain injury unit. I love my patients and have bonded with them. I work 12 hour shifts and work non-stop. We are understaffed and have intense patients. Most are totally dependent.

At first, things were going well. I love the fast pace and the day flies by. But lately the drama with the other employees and dealing with some of the narcissistic patients are killing me. The employees are always complaining about each other, bring their problems to work and constantly taking breaks. So I just don’t get any down time to give my head a break.

There are 3 patients that play head games. It seems like I am the only one around to answer their call bells. This week I have been sick so it was like they smelt fresh meat. Their neediness went through the roof. They ran me ragged. I was sick, exhausted and no break. Not to mention that there is constant screaming and banging on my floor. Several patients are being more sexual inappropriate than usual too.

I am not sure how to handle it. There are moments throughout the day where I am absolutely certain I am where God wants me and other times where I just feel abused.

Any advice on how to deal with working with women? How do you avoid the drama? How do you get smokers to work and not constantly take smoking breaks?

I often want to quit but when I pray to God, I just know it is where He wants me.

 

[Deo_Gratias42]

Any advice on how to deal with working with women? How do you avoid the drama?

You can’t.

How do you get smokers to work and not constantly take smoking breaks?

Realistically, you can’t. Think of it this way. They are likely smoking to relieve their stress and frustrations. If they don’t do it that way, they could be taking it out on you. The longer you work in those types jobs, the more the stress gets to you and it affects you.

The best advice I can give you is to focus on your job and your patients. Look at it as an opportunity to grow in virtue. Find healthy ways to manage your stress, and do the best you can to get adequate sleep each night. Eat healthy food and exercise to help burn off the stress chemicals. Try to go to Mass as often as you can each week, and if possible, go to Adoration, or visit Jesus in the tabernacle and tell him all your worries and stress. I did that once when I was working in a really stressful work environment and my supervisor was just piling it on me that day. I went to go move my car during lunch and came across a Catholic church. I didn’t think it would be open, but I stopped and tried the door anyways. It was open, and I went into the nave and just bawled my eyes out and told Jesus all my frustrations. The afternoon went better.

 

[cviolette]

You can’t.

Realistically, you can’t. Think of it this way. They are likely smoking to relieve their stress and frustrations. If they don’t do it that way, they could be taking it out on you. The longer you work in those types jobs, the more the stress gets to you and it affects you.

The best advice I can give you is to focus on your job and your patients. Look at it as an opportunity to grow in virtue. Find healthy ways to manage your stress, and do the best you can to get adequate sleep each night. Eat healthy food and exercise to help burn off the stress chemicals. Try to go to Mass as often as you can each week, and if possible, go to Adoration, or visit Jesus in the tabernacle and tell him all your worries and stress. I did that once when I was working in a really stressful work environment and my supervisor was just piling it on me that day. I went to go move my car during lunch and came across a Catholic church. I didn’t think it would be open, but I stopped and tried the door anyways. It was open, and I went into the nave and just bawled my eyes out and told Jesus all my frustrations. The afternoon went better.

It is just tough to see the smokers going off the floor all the time. Makes my job that much harder.

The patients are what keep me going. I just connect with them. It must be so hard to be trapped in your body with no control and no way to communicate. When I can make them smile or watch them sleep peacefully, it just warms my heart. They just moved one of my girls to another floor and I miss her. I will take a shift on that floor just to make sure they know her routine and are treating her right. She is violent but she will not hurt you if you know what you are doing.

I always have my rosary with me and pray on the way to work. I think I need to pray during the shift too. Definitely need to pray for patience. I wish there was a church close by but the closes one is 20 minutes away. It would be perfect to spend my break going to adoration. I do go to at least one daily mass a week and adoration a couple times a month. I have a tough schedule right now.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

I am struggling with doing God’s work and feeling burnt out and used. I feel strongly that God wants me helping the sick but am unsure whether I am following his plan and not mine.

I am currently going to school for nursing and working as a nursing assistant in a traumatic brain injury unit. I love my patients and have bonded with them. I work 12 hour shifts and work non-stop. We are understaffed and have intense patients. Most are totally dependent.

At first, things were going well. I love the fast pace and the day flies by. But lately the drama with the other employees and dealing with some of the narcissistic patients are killing me. The employees are always complaining about each other, bring their problems to work and constantly taking breaks. So I just don’t get any down time to give my head a break.

There are 3 patients that play head games. It seems like I am the only one around to answer their call bells. This week I have been sick so it was like they smelt fresh meat. Their neediness went through the roof. They ran me ragged. I was sick, exhausted and no break. Not to mention that there is constant screaming and banging on my floor. Several patients are being more sexual inappropriate than usual too.

I am not sure how to handle it. There are moments throughout the day where I am absolutely certain I am where God wants me and other times where I just feel abused.

Any advice on how to deal with working with women? How do you avoid the drama? How do you get smokers to work and not constantly take smoking breaks?

I often want to quit but when I pray to God, I just know it is where He wants me.

Brain-injured patients are very difficult to deal with, as you know. If you do not take care of yourself, you WILL burn out. And then you won’t do them or yourself or your family any good. Why were you at work if you were sick? I do not think it is God’s plan to have you working while you are sick and exhausted.

As for the other staff…A tough one. You really can’t do much except try not to participate in the drama. Of course if you make that obvious, you will be a target of their scorn and may be targeted to be taken advantage of (not answering the patients’ calls).

You should take your own breaks and the smokers should not abuse the breaks. DO NOT do their work for them. Please take care of yourself and if you are sick, stay home. As they say on airplanes, put your own oxygen mask on before attending to anyone else or you risk dying yourself.

 

[CB_Catholic]

I am struggling with doing God’s work and feeling burnt out and used. I feel strongly that God wants me helping the sick but am unsure whether I am following his plan and not mine.

I am currently going to school for nursing and working as a nursing assistant in a traumatic brain injury unit. I love my patients and have bonded with them. I work 12 hour shifts and work non-stop. We are understaffed and have intense patients. Most are totally dependent.

At first, things were going well. I love the fast pace and the day flies by. But lately the drama with the other employees and dealing with some of the narcissistic patients are killing me. The employees are always complaining about each other, bring their problems to work and constantly taking breaks. So I just don’t get any down time to give my head a break.

There are 3 patients that play head games. It seems like I am the only one around to answer their call bells. This week I have been sick so it was like they smelt fresh meat. Their neediness went through the roof. They ran me ragged. I was sick, exhausted and no break. Not to mention that there is constant screaming and banging on my floor. Several patients are being more sexual inappropriate than usual too.

I am not sure how to handle it. There are moments throughout the day where I am absolutely certain I am where God wants me and other times where I just feel abused.

Any advice on how to deal with working with women? How do you avoid the drama? How do you get smokers to work and not constantly take smoking breaks?

I often want to quit but when I pray to God, I just know it is where He wants me.

Unless you are the boss, you don’t have the authority to get people not to take smoke breaks. So you just have to distance yourself from that one. I am an RN and work in a similar environment, (although there is absolutely no smoking where I work), and one thing I’ve had to learn is not to expect things of others. Just do your own work to the best of your ability, and let the others be, unless someone is putting patients at risk. You can learn to tune out a lot of the negative conversation, etc.

As for some of the sick people running you ragged, this is not unusual behavior for people with chronic illness or severe illness. Many people in these situations feel they have lost control over their lives, so they try to control who and what they can. They can become very demanding. Their families can become very demanding also. And if they are brain injured, they can be twice as difficult to work with and need good boundary-setting with a lot of reinforcement. They don’t process information normally, and one needs a lot of patience with them. There are a number of good articles in Nursing magazines about boundary setting and dealing with difficult and brain-injured patients, and the use of effective communication tools that might help you. There is stuff on the internet also. As a nurse, you will spend the rest of your career dealing with sick patients and their needs, so get used to it. But you do not have to spend your career as a doormat, either.

Spend a little time looking up and reading articles on effective communication and dealing with difficult patients and families. It will be well worth your time. And last, but not least, take care of yourself. Find time for a break–you are entitled by law to have one, and if the smokers can find the time for one, there is no reason you can’t have one. You might have to be a little assertive on this one. God bless you.

 

[cviolette]

Brain-injured patients are very difficult to deal with, as you know. If you do not take care of yourself, you WILL burn out. And then you won’t do them or yourself or your family any good. Why were you at work if you were sick? I do not think it is God’s plan to have you working while you are sick and exhausted.

As for the other staff…A tough one. You really can’t do much except try not to participate in the drama. Of course if you make that obvious, you will be a target of their scorn and may be targeted to be taken advantage of (not answering the patients’ calls).

You should take your own breaks and the smokers should not abuse the breaks. DO NOT do their work for them. Please take care of yourself and if you are sick, stay home. As they say on airplanes, put your own oxygen mask on before attending to anyone else or you risk dying yourself.

I have laryngitis and a cold. Not sick enough to call out but enough to make it hard to work 12 hours. We are short staffed because we have a new patient that needs to be one on one. So one of us gets pulled from the floor to watch him. It would be tough on the patients if I called in sick. They don’t always call agency staff when someone calls out.

It is hard not to do their work but am getting better at saying no when I know they are taking advantage of me. I will need to learn how to better set boundaries with patients and other workers or they will step all over me

The smoking is a tough one. I am outnumbered when it comes to smokers and probably not a battle I want to fight or could win.

You are right that if I don’t take care of myself then I can’t take care of someone else. I do have the next 3 days off I will be relaxing and getting plenty of sleep.

You are so right about the drama. They will even corner me and try to get me to pick sides. It is high school all over. Didn’t like it back then either.

 

[CB_Catholic]

I am struggling with doing God’s work and feeling burnt out and used. I feel strongly that God wants me helping the sick but am unsure whether I am following his plan and not mine.

I am currently going to school for nursing and working as a nursing assistant in a traumatic brain injury unit. I love my patients and have bonded with them. I work 12 hour shifts and work non-stop. We are understaffed and have intense patients. Most are totally dependent.

At first, things were going well. I love the fast pace and the day flies by. But lately the drama with the other employees and dealing with some of the narcissistic patients are killing me. The employees are always complaining about each other, bring their problems to work and constantly taking breaks. So I just don’t get any down time to give my head a break.

There are 3 patients that play head games. It seems like I am the only one around to answer their call bells. This week I have been sick so it was like they smelt fresh meat. Their neediness went through the roof. They ran me ragged. I was sick, exhausted and no break. Not to mention that there is constant screaming and banging on my floor. Several patients are being more sexual inappropriate than usual too.

I am not sure how to handle it. There are moments throughout the day where I am absolutely certain I am where God wants me and other times where I just feel abused.

Any advice on how to deal with working with women? How do you avoid the drama? How do you get smokers to work and not constantly take smoking breaks?

I often want to quit but when I pray to God, I just know it is where He wants me.

Unless you are the boss, you don’t have the authority to get people not to take smoke breaks. So you just have to distance yourself from that one. I am an RN and work in a similar environment, (although there is absolutely no smoking where I work), and one thing I’ve had to learn is not to expect things of others. Just do your own work to the best of your ability, and let the others be, unless someone is putting patients at risk. You can learn to tune out a lot of the negative conversation, etc.

As for some of the sick people running you ragged, this is not unusual behavior for people with chronic illness or severe illness. Many people in these situations feel they have lost control over their lives, so they try to control who and what they can. They can become very demanding. Their families can become very demanding also. Try to remember that these are behaviors they use to cope with the extreme stress they are under. Ordinarily they would not act like that. There are a number of good articles in Nursing magazines about boundary setting and dealing with difficult patients, and the use of effective communication tools that might help you. There is stuff on the internet also. As a nurse, you will spend the rest of your career dealing with sick patients and their needs, so get used to it. But you do not have to spend your career as a doormat, either.

Spend a little time looking up and reading articles on effective communication and dealing with difficult patients and families. It will be well worth your time. And last, but not least, take care of yourself. Find time for a break–you are entitled by law to have one, and if the smokers can find the time for one, there is no reason you can’t have one. You might have to be a little assertive on this one. God bless you.

 

[Demetra2]

I really can’t give you any advice but I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for the work that you do with a very dificult group of patients. As a person who survived a brain aneurysm/coma and was hospitalized for a month I am very grateful for the help that my nurses gave me and I am so sorry that your patients are not appreciating your efforts. I owe my life and recovery to my neurosugeon and the incredible team of nurses and I thank God for them every day. I know that you must realize that your patients probably are not fully aware of how inappropriate they are to you. I tried my best to treat my nurses with respect and not be a pain in the rear but I probably was from time to time. I hope you know that as they recover they will think about your kindness and dedication and will thank you even if they never have an opportunity to tell you.

 

[cviolette]

Unless you are the boss, you don’t have the authority to get people not to take smoke breaks. So you just have to distance yourself from that one. I am an RN and work in a similar environment, (although there is absolutely no smoking where I work), and one thing I’ve had to learn is not to expect things of others. Just do your own work to the best of your ability, and let the others be, unless someone is putting patients at risk. You can learn to tune out a lot of the negative conversation, etc.

As for some of the sick people running you ragged, this is not unusual behavior for people with chronic illness or severe illness. Many people in these situations feel they have lost control over their lives, so they try to control who and what they can. They can become very demanding. Their families can become very demanding also. Try to remember that these are behaviors they use to cope with the extreme stress they are under. Ordinarily they would not act like that. There are a number of good articles in Nursing magazines about boundary setting and dealing with difficult patients, and the use of effective communication tools that might help you. There is stuff on the internet also. As a nurse, you will spend the rest of your career dealing with sick patients and their needs, so get used to it. But you do not have to spend your career as a doormat, either.

Spend a little time looking up and reading articles on effective communication and dealing with difficult patients and families. It will be well worth your time. And last, but not least, take care of yourself. Find time for a break–you are entitled by law to have one, and if the smokers can find the time for one, there is no reason you can’t have one. You might have to be a little assertive on this one. God bless you.

We have a new nurse manager. I am hoping she will step up to the plate about the breaks. You should not be taking 6 or 7 breaks a day. She just recently announce no cell phones on the floor. Not that anyone is listening. It is the most dysfunctional place I have ever worked.

I actually do pretty good with the demanding families. I understand looking out for your loved ones. Several of them request that I take care of their family members. There are some patients that are just impossible. Of course, that is why I am stuck dealing with them.

I am use to working with professionals. Second career for me. I was an engineer and quit work to raise my family. I just started in the medical field. Starting at the bottom has been humbling. I figured I would start as a nursing assistant to see if I like it before investing too much time and money. It has been an eye opener. If I didn’t love my patients so much, I could never do it. Sometimes I miss my quiet cubicle with just me and my computer.

 

[cviolette]

I really can’t give you any advice but I would like to take this opportunity to thank you for the work that you do with a very dificult group of patients. As a person who survived a brain aneurysm/coma and was hospitalized for a month I am very grateful for the help that my nurses gave me and I am so sorry that your patients are not appreciating your efforts. I owe my life and recovery to my neurosugeon and the incredible team of nurses and I thank God for them every day. I know that you must realize that your patients probably are not fully aware of how inappropriate they are to you. I tried my best to treat my nurses with respect and not be a pain in the rear but I probably was from time to time. I hope you know that as they recover they will think about your kindness and dedication and will thank you even if they never have an opportunity to tell you.

I am happy that things worked out well for you. And you were probably not a pain in the rear. I know when patients first arrive they always need more care because they are scared and confused. I love to see my patients recover and do anything I can to make them comfortable. Your nurses were happy to take care of you or are in the wrong field.

The patients that I have a problem with were not nice before the accident. One was a drug addict and spoiled rotten and is sexually harassing all the young aids. He uses the f work constantly, complains constantly, calls us names and yells at us. He is the rudest man that I have ever met in my life. And my taxes are paying for him to treat me like trash. The other guy is constantly ringing his bell and is making sexual remarks. Asking for the urinal constantly so we can touch him. Wanting to pick who showers him. We have a mentally handicap woman on the floor and he encourages her to strip. These are not normal men. Some of their behaviors were increased because of there injuries but they were not nice before.

I do understand TBIs. I get scratched, spit at, swore at, punched, and pinched by patients that have no self control. I still try to break through to those patients and learn what works best with them. But the ones that are playing head games, I have no patience.

 

[lily20]

I am struggling with doing God’s work and feeling burnt out and used. I feel strongly that God wants me helping the sick but am unsure whether I am following his plan and not mine.

I am currently going to school for nursing and working as a nursing assistant in a traumatic brain injury unit. I love my patients and have bonded with them. I work 12 hour shifts and work non-stop. We are understaffed and have intense patients. Most are totally dependent.

At first, things were going well. I love the fast pace and the day flies by. But lately the drama with the other employees and dealing with some of the narcissistic patients are killing me. The employees are always complaining about each other, bring their problems to work and constantly taking breaks. So I just don’t get any down time to give my head a break.

There are 3 patients that play head games. It seems like I am the only one around to answer their call bells. This week I have been sick so it was like they smelt fresh meat. Their neediness went through the roof. They ran me ragged. I was sick, exhausted and no break. Not to mention that there is constant screaming and banging on my floor. Several patients are being more sexual inappropriate than usual too.

I am not sure how to handle it. There are moments throughout the day where I am absolutely certain I am where God wants me and other times where I just feel abused.

Any advice on how to deal with working with women? How do you avoid the drama? How do you get smokers to work and not constantly take smoking breaks?

I often want to quit but when I pray to God, I just know it is where He wants me.

Have some sort of entertainment come in, to distract them. Then, hopefully there will be some grace on you for a short while

 

[cviolette]

Have some sort of entertainment come in, to distract them. Then, hopefully there will be some grace on you for a short while

It does help when their family is visiting. The call bell never rings

 

[petitfleur]

I remember you discerning to be an aid and here you are! Very happy to read this. Not your struggles, but that you went through it. My youngest is four. When he starts full time school I hope to go back and get a nursing degree myself.

 

[cviolette]

I remember you discerning to be an aid and here you are! Very happy to read this. Not your struggles, but that you went through it. My youngest is four. When he starts full time school I hope to go back and get a nursing degree myself.

Thank you I love being back in school now that the kids are older. I am just taking A&P 1 right now but love it. I love that I apply what I learn in class at work. I start my nursing classes in Sept. I can’t wait.

It might not sound like it from my original post but I do love my job. It was just a tough week because I was sick. Now that I feel better, things are going smoothly. Still tons of drama but I am better to handle it