Doing the best Lent possible

[Thomh]

Hello.

I live with my non practicing (and not really catholic either) parents and I have troubles finding the right way to practice Lent. My mom especially doesn’t let me do Lent properly (she thinks I’m too extreme because I don’t take dessert to give you an idea) and she’s always trying to give me more food on my plate or buying food I like.
I’m also 6 ft 5 for 176 pounds (27 yo), calories are burning fast for me which isn’t helpful. I dont really know what quantity of food I can take per meal without feeling too weak.
Of course, I know Lent isn’t just about food but on many other spiritual efforts but I know it’s an important part of it and I don’t want to miss it. I failed it last year because of my weakness and my mom worrying too much for me.

I would be thankful for any advice.

God bless you and may your Lent be fruitful.

 

[Maximilian75]

it doesn’t just have to be food- you seem like you need as much as possible.
You can take up cold showers, or sleep without a pillow or blankets, or sleep on the floor, or give up social media.

 

[Zaccheus]

I would say the first thing to do is talk to a nutritionist. Find out how much food you need to maintain good health.
Then–your mother tries to stop you from doing this? Tell her once, politely, that you understand she cares about you but you’re an adult and you mean to do this.
Then just refuse to eat more than the amount you’ve decided on.

Don’t comment on the excess she puts on your plate. Say politely “No thank you” when she offers you more.

(This point is important). Do not argue with her. Do not let yourself be drawn into an argument, and do not feel you need to justify yourself.
If she tries to argue, or insists you explain why you won’t eat more, just say “I understand but that’s all I’m going to eat for now.”

Remember patience is a virtue. Patiently dealing with your mother’s attempts to keep you from fasting can itself be an offering to God.

It is true that there can be fasts other than fasting from food. Perhaps there are other things you can do as a Lenten fast.

 

[JanSobieskiIII]

You’re an adult. Tell her to treat you as such.

 

[Thomh]

Did what you suggest already but it’s not that easy with her. She’s very sensitive and obstinate sometimes but I’ll try my best.

I’ll follow your advices on doing other penances as well. A priest told me I could do that but he didn’t have time to give me more indications so your suggestions are welcomed.

Thanks.

 

[otjm]

For starters, unless you have indicated your age elsewhere, it appears you are not an adult.

And as such, perhaps one of your penances is to honor your parents - which would include eating more rather than less. I was 6’1" and weighed about that when I was in the military, and you are uncomfortably skinny. I would get thee hence to a doctor and find out what is what, as your weight/height ratio is skewed off seriously.

You are also looking at Lent as a time to “give up something”. You night do far better changing you focus to doing something positive that you are not doing now; prayer is the first thing that comes to mind. If you do not say a daily rosary, you might do that; or you might go on line and do part of the Liturgy of the Hours.

Or you might sit down with an examination of conscience (there are several on line) and read it over; then focus on where you may have occasion to sin by omission. That is a good place to start working on one’s spiritual life, as omission is often due to either laziness or distaste for what one needs to do, but isn’t doing.

Giving up dessert might be something for a grade school kid to do, but you are older, and it is time to get a bit more serious about Lent.