Don't want to

[Stylus]

I was homeschooled my whole life. I am now graduated, but have younger siblings who are still being educated at home. My mom often gets overwhelmed by it my dad assigns tutoring duties to me and other older siblings to take some of the load off. I have no good memories from being homeschooled. I can’t stand it and I want to forget about it forever. When I’m asked to help with it I get very angry and upset (internally). My mom knows (though may not understand) that I am quite disturbed when asked to help with it and then she gets upset and nervous. The worst thing, is I feel that God is mad at me for feeling this way. I feel that He’s angry that I am reacting this way when my mother needs help and that I am very wrong to be upset. Am I being too hard on myself or do I need to toughen up?

 

[aspawloski4th]

Toughen up! why did you hate home school< I wonder? you are very lucky to have been home schooled. Because of my unique school experience I am qualified to judge education on a fair scale. I have been to both Catholic and public school both reguler and special ed. Im here to say in most urban areas public ed is a waste of time to go thru. theres a severe lack of disclepline, teachers dont keep law and order in the class room, drugs, peer pressure, and teaching is to the lowest common denominator. what was 9th grade subject in 1960 for example is 12th grade now. public schools is where the new dieas get tied first ie look and see method of reading, new math, handing out condoms, etc.Catholic schools vary much in quality from area to area. maybe your parents couldnt afford them. If I had kids today theyd be home schooled for 2 reasons, I dont want a kid of mine even stepping on the premisis of a public school, and Im not even close to affording a Catholic school. when considered for college, because of your homeschooling you will get in ahead of most other students. Your home school education is a great blessing!

 

[mumto5]

I’ve taught in classrooms, I’ve been through school, I’ve tutored privately and I homeschool my kids. Overall, homeschooling offers the most opportunities for children to develop into well rounded, well socialised human beings. If you hated homeschooling you may have hated school as well. In fact, you may have hated it more. I wish I could forget my school days.

That said…

HOW you were homeschooled is the key. It is possible to do a rotten job of homeschooling and make it a negative experience. Your experience may well not have been positive. The kind of homeschooling I wouldn’t like, and that’s just me, is one where a curriculum is strictly adhered to with no accomodating the child’s individual needs and abilities and little hands on experience. Also, I think any good homeschooling programme involves a lot of time doing things outside the home in community groups and classes.

Why don’t you talk to your mum about your feelings? It’s possible that your experience was negative, but it could just be that the approach used wasn’t right for you. School may not have suited any better.

My kids love being homeschooled and what they are learning and the activities they do. They all plan to homeschool their kids though I find it unlikely they all will (yes, even the teenager wants to). It’s clearly a positive experience for them. My eldest was given the option of high school this year and has chosen to continue with homeschooling for a number of reasons, fortunately all positive reasons.

 

[puzzleannie]

If mom is being overwhelmed, and dad has to “force” this teen to help with tutoring, and furthermore if teen has only bad recollections of it, it sounds as if homeschooling is not the best choice for this particular family, that mom feels inadequate to the task, and that it perhaps is more of a control issue for dad that is having bad effects rather than the desired effects.

 

[JMJ_Theresa]

I’m reading the Little House on the Prairie books for the umpteenth time. This time to my six year old. You would identify with Laura. She doesn’t want to teach school, but she never tells her parents. She does it to please her mom and to earn income to help Mary go to Blind School.

When you look back on this period of your life, you will wish that you helped the family without complaining. I know there is much I wished I could change. If you cannot bring yourself to do it for them, do it for Jesus. One day I was taking out the trash, complaining to Jesus that it was not my job. I felt him say to me in my mind, “Would you do it for me?” I was so happy then. I didn’t really mind doing it.

I’m feeling really inspired by the Little House books. I used to identify with Laura, but now I’m identifying with Ma. Maybe you could read them. If you want, start with The Long Winter–it is where Laura learns of her parents’ desire for her to be a school teacher.

Also, are you praying for your parents? Children are the brothers and sisters in Christ for their parents. The more you grow in sacrificial love, the more you will be like Christ.

I know it is not easy. Blame Adam and Eve–they gave us these selfish and rebellious hearts. Unfortunately, you will be struggling all your life with this (sorry), but starting young makes it easier than waiting to you are older and have a lot of bad habits.

 

[deb1]

Stylus:

I was homeschooled my whole life. I am now graduated, but have younger siblings who are still being educated at home. My mom often gets overwhelmed by it my dad assigns tutoring duties to me and other older siblings to take some of the load off. I have no good memories from being homeschooled. I can’t stand it and I want to forget about it forever. When I’m asked to help with it I get very angry and upset (internally). My mom knows (though may not understand) that I am quite disturbed when asked to help with it and then she gets upset and nervous. The worst thing, is I feel that God is mad at me for feeling this way. I feel that He’s angry that I am reacting this way when my mother needs help and that I am very wrong to be upset. Am I being too hard on myself or do I need to toughen up?

I have several questions.How old are you and what are your future plans? Are you going to college? Do you work? How old are your siblings and are they made to be basically obedient and respectful to you while you teach?

We homeschool. I ask my oldest son-he often volunteers-to read with his little sister. I do this because he is dyslexic and I have noticed that helping read with his sister, who is only seven, seems to assist him. If he hated it I would end the sessions. Luckily, he doesn’t. I do make certain his sister listens to him and shows him respect as her teacher.

Homeschooling, although wonderful, is not for everyone. Some women are just not patient enough. This might be your mother’s problem.

 

[LynnieLew]

puzzleannie:

If mom is being overwhelmed, and dad has to “force” this teen to help with tutoring, and furthermore if teen has only bad recollections of it, it sounds as if homeschooling is not the best choice for this particular family, that mom feels inadequate to the task, and that it perhaps is more of a control issue for dad that is having bad effects rather than the desired effects.

I agree with many of these points.

While homeschooling sound “ideal” to me, I can’t do it. I have a Masters degree and my husband is college educated so I am sure we could muddle through it okay but neither of us have the patience. I stay at home with the kiddos and one of my hesitations is what the OP mother is going through. God either calls you to this or not. That being said it is something to pray about.