Dreaming

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Kathrin

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I can be quite a dreamer. Ah, the longing, sometimes I seem to crave the longing for something tiself… But I have so much already, one of my big dreams (studying in San Francisco, and then spending time and time there again, helping the homeless…) has come true… now suddenly I’ve started having this other dream about travelling somewhere else. It is really a longing I feel. And a friend of mine by coincidence is going just there this Sunday, and she checked if there was space in the car… there isn’t, and I feel an immense sadness now.
Is it ok to dream, to feel like that? Or is this greedy, wanting too much?

Kathrin
 
Wow.
She just wrote me that on the way back she drives alone.
I could first go to Austria and then head down there and come back with her.
Oh man.
I wonder if this is just a craziness of mine. But I would so love to do it. But feel guilty.
  1. I have so much already
  2. Maybe I just want to do something special again. But I should BOAST IN THE LORD, not in what I do.
  3. What if I still need to catch an injured pigeon? I’ve been trying to free them from strings around their feet.
  4. I told another old lady who invited me for a few days that that was too long… and now I am going for maybe 2 weeks. Well, I didn’t tell her it was too long timewise, I think I even did say i could if i wanted to, but it was too long for me to stay there in one place.
    But hey, i thought, I could visit her too, it is KIND OF on the way. Just at least for a bit so she knows she’s important too.
Any advice? Just pray about it? Sleep over it a few times (I don’t need to decide right now)?

Kathrin

SO EXCITED! Wondering if that’s ok.
 
You know what… and I do understand that nobody has replied, it may all be just too personal… but I think what I feel guilty about is wanting to do a trip like that out of the blue. Even if it will be low budget I still feel a little guilty about spending the money… and just about wanting to go on a trip like that. It’s gonna be along the Mediterranean coast (if I do it), very beautiful I think… Maybe I need to justify it somehow. But other people go on vacation too… And back and forth between Switzerland and San francisco isn’t really vacation for me anymore.
 
Kathrin, I think you should trust in God… about whether to go. Sometimes, that little “gut feeling” we all get, is Our Lord… encouraging us. You will know, in time… what His purpose is.

And even if it was not Jesus, prompting you to go. You can still offer it to Him, and see what He does with it. God bless you. 🙂
 
(((((((((((hugs))))))))))))

So it doesn’t sound like I am just doing this completely selfish thing, totally un-Christian and foolish? That my scrupulosity talking?
Sometimes it is sooo hard to differentiate. See, I am somebody who gives money to people when I have it, yes helping somebody with a train ticket somewhere too, but I really have a hard time spending anything on myself. Money as well as time… that I could spend otherwise.
 
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