Dressing for Mass

[Genesius_of_KC]

As of the Easter Vigil my family and I are new catholics We are thrilled with our conversion and it has been a wonderful experience. Part of what has made it so wonderful was finally being able to participate fully in the Mass. Being in the presence of Christ is an overwhelming exprience that we are all honored to be a part of. He in lies my problem…our children have shared in our experience and are equally happy ( they are middle grade school age) We fully believe that in attending Mass we are in the presence of Christ and so we expect them to dress with respect and honor that presence. We do not see that practiced at all in our church. It is shocking to me. Why is it that when children recieve their first communion we expect them to dress in near formal attire for the first experience of recieveing Jesus but any time after that jeans, tanktops w/bras hanging out, underware showing out of pants flip-flops, skirts and shorts that leave nothing to the imagination are appropriate to present at the altar? I understand that the Lord accepts us for who we are not what we wear but when did the lowest form of dress become the acceptable standard? We live in a very nice urban area. And it does not cost any more money to dress respectfully than not. If any of these people were invited to a dinner at the whitehouse in the presence of the the president they would have no trouble finding appropriate clothing to represent that honor.
The only reason I have issue with this is that in expcecting our children to dress appropriately they question why they have to wear dresses and dress clothing when (in their eyes) no one else is. I have tried to ask some friends in the parish why this is and overwhelingly their response is that “that’s just the way it is”…“it’s like that everywhere”…this seems so sad to me…

 

[dulcissima]

I know that you know this, but you really only have any control over what you and your family do, not what the other parishoners do. I do agree with you that it is important to make the effort to dress nicely for Mass. If the fact that everyone else doesn’t is a source of friction for your family, you might want to see if there is another nearby parish that fits your values a little bit better. I recently changed parishes to one that is only 5 miles from my former parish, and in the same general suburb. It is a night and day difference. People at my new parish by and large do put in the effort to present themselves in their Sunday best and are much more reverent. Not surprisingly it is also a parish with far fewer liturgical abuses.

So, something to think about.

 

[mholoth]

Just let them know-this is the right thing to do, so we will be doing it. It teaches them a good life lesson, that the right thing, is most often the least done thing. It will also help grow their respect for you (not that they will tell you in the next 10 years-lol), seeing you do the right thing when few or no one else is.

Coming from a protestant religion, I think I see more ‘bang’ in the true presence than maybe someone who has always known that. That probably affects the way I dress and the way I require my kids to dress for mass.

 

[dkoinzan]

I agree that we all should dress to be in the presence of a King!!! Be a good example for all that don’t.

 

[Maxply]

This is a great concern of mine as well. When I was a kid, adults would even wear suits and ties to church. Now, you look around, and folks are casually running around in the kind of stuff you’d wear to clean out the basement!

I dress up. It’s important to hit the right level. I think it’s wise to be just a bit nicer dressed than the slobs are, but not to wear a suit. I think there would be odd social repercussions for jumping to that level.

 

[royal_archer]

I agree that we all should dress to be in the presence of a King!!! Be a good example for all that don’t.

I guess a lot of us have grown comfortable in our relationship with God. I don’t dress like I am going ot clean the basement but I do dress like I would visiting family: cassual but not sloppy. We used to dress up but felt realy out of place.

 

[nannygirl]

As of the Easter Vigil my family and I are new catholics

The only reason I have issue with this is that in expcecting our children to dress appropriately they question why they have to wear dresses and dress clothing when (in their eyes) no one else is. I have tried to ask some friends in the parish why this is and overwhelingly their response is that “that’s just the way it is”…“it’s like that everywhere”…this seems so sad to me…

Welcome to the Catholic Faith!

As long as your children live under your roof, they should be expected to follow your rules. Kids should not be in charge of the family. What you are expecting in the way of dressing for Holy Mass is reasonable. It shouldn’t matter what the others are wearing. Too many parents have caved in on this. Why would any father allow his daughter to dress in a way that would cause adult men to ogle her - at church, no less?! Americans in general have become extremely casual in their dress. Sad…

 

[nannygirl]

This is a great concern of mine as well. When I was a kid, adults would even wear suits and ties to church. Now, you look around, and folks are casually running around in the kind of stuff you’d wear to clean out the basement!

I dress up. It’s important to hit the right level. I think it’s wise to be just a bit nicer dressed than the slobs are, but not to wear a suit. I think there would be odd social repercussions for jumping to that level.

I like to dress up, too. Most of the people who attend our Masses do, too. All of the kids are dressed nicely, some in suits, most in nice slacks and shirt, girls in dresses or skirts. I think someone who dressed very casually might feel out of place (shorts, tank tops, jeans, etc.), though they would still be very welcome.