Drinking in front of kids

[momof3inOR]

I am curious – as parents, do you have guidelines about when you drink alcohol? Do you have a glass of wine with dinner nightly? How do you explain it to your kids? Do you order a bottle of wine when you go out to dinner?

If you don’t drink around kids, please explain your thoughts, as well.

God Bless.

 

[mfrances]

I don’t have kids but our cousin has kids and we are always around him and his wife…

They make everyone put their alcoholic drink in a regluar cup, absolutely no drinking out of beer bottles.

 

[janet1025]

I don’t drink but my husband will have a beer now and then. We do allow alcohol around the children in moderation. I do not allow anyone to drink excessively in front of them. My children know the reason they do not know their grandfather is because he is an alcoholic so they know abusing alcohol has ramifications

 

[Em_in_FL]

We drink alcohol in front of the kids all the time. We drink in moderation (sometimes a glass of wine or a beer in the evenings after dinner), and I actually think it’s a healthy exposure to how alcohol should be treated. We certainly aren’t abusing it, and we’re allowing them to see it’s okay in healthy moderation.

 

[mommamaree]

My husband and I and our families all feel fine about drinking in front of our kids and nieces and nephews. We drink wine in wine glasses, cocktails in up-glasses or lowball glasses, and beer in pilsner glasses or straight from the bottle. It is a joyful part of family get-togethers to share one of God’s gifts, fermented beverages, and no one goes overboard. We all have family members or friends who were or are alcoholics, so we are aware of how alcohol can be abused. My nephews regularly taste their parents beers, and my daughter has tasted my wine once. It is just curiosity and we all feel it is better to let them, even young children, taste a tiny sip than to act like it is forbidden fruit. State laws vary, but where we live, this is perfectly legal. And in some European countries, kids are often given watered-down wine or beer as a treat with dinner.
When I am the only one home with my kids, I do not have anything alcoholic until after bedtime, but again, I am temperate so that if my kids need me, I am capable and alert. Well, I am like that whenever I drink, but even more careful when it is just me at home with them.
Dinners out at restaurants usually include wine and water instead of soft drinks. It is no big deal for us so far, but my kids are quite young. My oldest is 7. I hope to continue with comfortable enjoyment even when they are teens.

 

[Joe_5859]

I never really thought of establishing guidelines about this. Certainly, drinking in excess around children would be problematic. I guess I don’t drink often enough to really think about it that much.

 

[garn9173]

**My husband and I and our families all feel fine about drinking in front of our kids and nieces and nephews. We drink wine in wine glasses, cocktails in up-glasses or lowball glasses, and beer in pilsner glasses or straight from the bottle. It is a joyful part of family get-togethers to share one of God’s gifts, fermented beverages, and no one goes overboard. **We all have family members or friends who were or are alcoholics, so we are aware of how alcohol can be abused. My nephews regularly taste their parents beers, and my daughter has tasted my wine once. It is just curiosity and we all feel it is better to let them, even young children, taste a tiny sip than to act like it is forbidden fruit. State laws vary, but where we live, this is perfectly legal. And in some European countries, kids are often given watered-down wine or beer as a treat with dinner.
When I am the only one home with my kids, I do not have anything alcoholic until after bedtime, but again, I am temperate so that if my kids need me, I am capable and alert. Well, I am like that whenever I drink, but even more careful when it is just me at home with them.
Dinners out at restaurants usually include wine and water instead of soft drinks. It is no big deal for us so far, but my kids are quite young. My oldest is 7. I hope to continue with comfortable enjoyment even when they are teens.

Agreed with most of the bolded, however, whenever we are together, my siblings and I tend to go overboard.

 

[triumphguy]

My wife and I have a glass of wine with Sunday dinners and special dinners. The kids have pop/soda.

Getting hammered and/or abusive/loud/obnoxious in front of your kids, and having a nice drink with a good dinner are two different things.

 

[Gordon_Sims]

I quit drinking a few years ago. Part of it was due to the fact that I get hangovers after more than one drink anymore, but the biggest reason was because I don’t want my kids to ever see me drunk. Although few would admit it, a good number of my extended family members have problems with alcohol. Our family parties are now little more than a chance for them to get together, drink to excess and badmouth/gossip about the family members who don’t share their views on drinking, politics and religion. If I don’t drink, while it gives them another reason to talk about me, it means I’m not caught up in that environment. I don’t have to listen to them verbally attacking others, watch them drink to the point of blacking out/passing out/vomitting, or have to lie to other family members about my words, actions or how much I really drink. I also don’t have to worry about explaining any of my behavior to my children, or about getting a call from their principal because they were imitating my drunken behavior at school, repeating the inappropriate things they heard me say or had turned in an assignment that said my favorite hobby was drinking (all of which, and more, has happened to several members of my family). I’m not saying I’ll never drink again, but I’ve not yet encountered a situation where the temptation to drink outweighed my reasons to not drink.

 

[Allegra]

I don’t think there is anything wrong with drinking in front of kids unless you are intending to become drunk. I am a moderate drinker, but if I was called upon to explain myself (I don’t know why I woud be compelled to explain my beverage to a child) I would say that the drink I was having was not for children.

 

[Nelka]

I have an occasional drink in the evening as alcohol is getting far too expensive.

As they are just toddlers they are always in bed when I drink.

I think it depends more on the culture than whether you have a glass of wine on front of your children.

 

[mommamaree]

I don’t think there is anything wrong with drinking in front of kids unless you are intending to become drunk. I am a moderate drinker, but if I was called upon to explain myself (I don’t know why I woud be compelled to explain my beverage to a child) I would say that the drink I was having was not for children.

My daughter has asked me about it. I explained that only fully grown people can safely consume alcohol. To the little bodies of children, it acts as a poison. And even too much for a grownup can kill them. This is also why mommy doesn’t drink while pregnant, because it could poison the baby.

This answer satisfied her and other than one sip of wine, because she knew wine is used in confecting the Eucharist, she has had no other questions. Kids will ask, not just to challenge, but more often to learn from parents.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

My daughter has asked me about it. I explained that only fully grown people can safely consume alcohol. To the little bodies of children, it acts as a poison. And even too much for a grownup can kill them. This is also why mommy doesn’t drink while pregnant, because it could poison the baby.

This answer satisfied her and other than one sip of wine, because she knew wine is used in confecting the Eucharist, she has had no other questions. Kids will ask, not just to challenge, but more often to learn from parents.

What a great answer!

 

[momof3inOR]

I second that…awesome answer

What a great answer!

 

[Joe_5859]

I don’t think there is anything wrong with drinking in front of kids unless you are intending to become drunk. I am a moderate drinker, but if I was called upon to explain myself (I don’t know why I woud be compelled to explain my beverage to a child) I would say that the drink I was having was not for children.

My daughter asks me about everything I drink when she can tell it’s not water or milk. It’s hard for me to imagine a person with kids not having to explain their beverage to a child.

 

[Joe_5859]

My daughter has asked me about it. I explained that only fully grown people can safely consume alcohol. To the little bodies of children, it acts as a poison. And even too much for a grownup can kill them. This is also why mommy doesn’t drink while pregnant, because it could poison the baby.

This answer satisfied her and other than one sip of wine, because she knew wine is used in confecting the Eucharist, she has had no other questions. Kids will ask, not just to challenge, but more often to learn from parents.

That is a good answer. I think that’s roughly how it was explained to me as a child. Of course, when I was a kid, my follow-up question was, “If it can be poisonous, then why bother drinking it at all?”

 

[Allegra]

My daughter asks me about everything I drink when she can tell it’s not water or milk. It’s hard for me to imagine a person with kids not having to explain their beverage to a child.

Identifying it isn’t the same as explaining why I’m drinking it. At least not to me.

 

[omegapd]

Although few would admit it, a good number of my extended family members have problems with alcohol. Our family parties are now little more than a chance for them to get together, drink to excess and badmouth/gossip about the family members who don’t share their views on drinking, politics and religion.

Hey, we’re related!

I had a ton of problems with alcohol and don’t allow it in my home. 9 years sober! Visiting others is where it gets tricky. My mother drinks to excess and doesn’t care who is around. She knows I have gotten sober but still talks to me about alcohol, etc. I have a brother-in-law who is in jail now on his 3rd DUI. He got out of a year long re-hab about a month ago- lots of good it did him. So, my kids (11 and 5) have seen how people act after consuming alcohol way past moderation. I can only pray that they don’t follow in my family’s footsteps with it.

EricW.

 

[JRKH]

I am curious – as parents, do you have guidelines about when you drink alcohol? Do you have a glass of wine with dinner nightly? How do you explain it to your kids? Do you order a bottle of wine when you go out to dinner?

If you don’t drink around kids, please explain your thoughts, as well.

God Bless.

Never drank much when my child was small but never hid it or made an issue of it either.

When I was a child, my parents were mainly beer drinkers. They would each have a bottle or two in the evening (sometimes splitting one)…And no one thougth twice in all of my extended family about a little one climbing up on a lap taking a sip of mom or dad’s beer. It was simply not any kind of issue.
Result? 5 kids raised and only one ever did any “wild, serious” drinking, running around etc…and HE drank very little once he got married.
Oh - not that we didn’t all go out and get plastered as teens (usual teenager stuff)…but we learned what moderation looked and acted like from our parents.

So - bottom line is - If you don’t make a big deal out of it - they likely won’t make a big deal out of it…

Peace
James

 

[maltmom]

Way back when, the drinking age was 18. My Mom didn’t drink. My Dad would occasionally have a drink. When I was 13 or 14 my Dad gave me a Sole Gin and 7-Up. Looking back I’m sure it was just enough Sole Gin to give it color and a little flavor. On special occasions he would fix me a drink. If I asked him out of the blue for one he never said no. When all of my friends in high school were sneaking out drinking I never did it. Alcohol wasn’t a big deal to me. I think I ended up with a healthy attitude about alcohol. To this day I can take it or leave it. Of course, if one did that today they’d go to jail.

I don’t see anything wrong with having a drink in front of your children. Drinking to excess is another thing. No child should see their parent drunk.