We all have particular reasons for the various things we decide on in our walk… I had read “The Way of the Pilgrim”, as my first Orthodox book, as a new Christian in my mid 50s, and said to myself: “I can do that!”, having no idea what I was walking into, but that was where God had sent me, so that was what I was there to do… And I did… But the secret reason I liked the Jesus Prayer, and its prayer rope, was that I could remember it even if I was blind, and I could be praying it as I was dying - It would always be there for me… No matter what…
And it turns out that this reason is not necessarily true, but even now it is true enough… I structured my whole life on the absence of spiritual props that were external to me… And having this tool embedded in my soul just seemed like a very good idea - And it is, even if what is really needed is the stillness of soul that is hidden within it, that is the real point of intersection with God in prayer… We are discipled, you see, but how that discipling works, and what it accomplishes, is often hidden from the one being discipled… I remember Paul describing those “Called to be Apostles”, describing them as “deceiving yet true…” Which is a clue, and a caution… This Faith is not given a roadmap of stages - Such a thing would kill it… It is a Mystery entered, the Mystery of Love and the Marriage of the Lamb… And we are not to be in charge of our progressing in it, which is why it is a Faith, and not a college course with an exam…
The Medicines of Immortality are deceptively simple…
May God guide your Way, Anna…
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