Eastern view of happiness?

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I want to get an eastern perspective on this question. I often struggle with depression and ask myself, “how can I be happy?” I can’t help but feel like I must DO something to feel happy such as feed the poor, have a successful career, be healthy, or something. Thoughts like, “when I do something great like feed poor children in Africa I will feel fulfilled and have purpose in life” run through my mind. Is it necessary to contribute to the lives of others in order to be truly happy? Or can one be happy by simply just being?

I once told an Orthodox friend that I didn’t know what my purpose in life was, that I was still searching for that one thing that would make me fulfilled. He had a pretty interesting response, he said, “the purpose of your life isn’t to do some activity, your life is your purpose.” Pretty good response if you ask me!

I feel I struggle with two ways of thinking about happiness… 1. Is to be some kind of Mother Teresa type person who loves and helps the poor and with this I will be fulfilled through this self-giving act of love.

or
  1. I should learn to find happiness in the present moment and learn that contentment/happiness is found in simply being alive.
When I think back to when I was like like 5 years old I never had feelings of emptiness or depression. I seemed pretty content with life and I was never focused on loving God and neighbor. I was just happy simply being a kid.

I’m not sure where I am going with all this but I guess my question is, how does one be happy?

What about pursuing ones passions? I enjoy playing guitar, writing about music, learning about different cultures…is it OK to find happiness in these things? I know it sounds silly but at the end of the day these are just “things”… I am very confused in my head as you can see. I can’t help but feel guilty if I want to find happiness in doing “things” because they aren’t God and they aren’t an act of loving my neighbor. I end up over thinking things and well… need some advice!!
 
Maybe you answered your own question, I don’t know. Didn’t Jesus say that unless we became like little children we couldn’t enter the kingdom of heaven? Sometimes I wonder if we don’t start out right and then as we become older, we make life harder than it has to really be. I was like you as a child. We weren’t rich but we weren’t poor and I was happy—just because it was Tuesday, if you know what I mean. And on Wednesday I was happy because it was Wednesday and so on. Some things–like Christmas morning–were an extra special joy—but I never worried about it. And then I grew up.
 
Happiness is a hard feeling to hold on to. After all our happiness is dependant upon outised influences. Example: i could be perfectly happy all day but then my husband comes home to tell me he lost his job. That would make me unhappy. Striving to find peace and joy in our lives is the trick. When you have peace nothing can shake it. True peace comes from competely trusting that God will bring you through any and all situations. Having joy is similiar to happiness. Having joy means you can still dance in the storms of life. These things come from within. Happiness on the other hand cones from this world. Ex: i feel really happy when i get a new purse! But when my new puppy chews up my new purse im not happy any more. Does that make sense?

Then you mentioned depression. I have clinical depression and have to be on meds. Depression is a great liar! It has an unbelievable ability to convince you that life is not worth living, that you will never be happy so why bother. Your depression has to be brought into check. There are many options other then meds to help eleviate depression. Mine is quite severe so i have to use meds and still have bad days. If yours isnt to bad things like exercise, fresh air, sunlight, orange juice, tuna fish, talking it out, meditation can help. From my experiences, i couldnt find any of the fruits of The Spirit until i addressed the depression. Saint Dymphna is the Patron Saint for mental illness, she has helped me on my bad days. My rosery has been a great help too.
Best wishes and prayers
 
One thing to remember: if you’re judging yourself by the example of Bl. Mother Theresa, you have set a nearly unreachable bar.

She’s an exemplary example of devotion to the poor and obedience to the Magisterium.

But even she had, according to some interviews, days where happiness seemed far off.

And, if you can, as she did, see the face of God in everyone you meet, perhaps you should be examining your life for a vocation.

Remember - we are called to be the light of Christ to the world - and she was an intense spotlight of it… but a thousand candles are a more useful light than a single 1000 candela spotlight.

Lots of reasons to be unhappy - injustice, iniquity, insincerity, suffering, and cruelty - almost none to be cruel, unjust, insincere, or sinful.
 
You are loving your neighbor by playing your music… perhaps you will write a song that will make many people happy, thus everyone will feel closer to God.

Being grateful increases one’s happiness. Not an “eastern” thought, but a scientific one.
The “Power of Now” book talks about being happier by being present.
Much depression is caused by thinking too much about the past or the future… which we can’t control. When we think about the present moment, we tend to be happier and less stressed.

🙂

You can get out of depression, sometimes, just by changing your body position and the way you use language… Tony Robbins is a life coach who talks about this…
 
You do the best you can and pray about it.

Some days I think the best way to love my neighbor is to do whatever I have to do to keep myself from falling apart and thus causing them unnecessary stress. 😃
 
“The soul that loves God has its rest in God and in God alone. In all the paths that men walk in in the world, they do not attain peace until they draw nigh to hope in God.”
  • St Isaac the Syrian, Homily 56, 89
“When the soul knows the love of God by the Holy Spirit, then he clearly feels that the Lord is our own Father, the closest, dearest Father, the best. And there is not greater happiness that to love God with all the mind and heart, and our neighbor as ourself. And when this love is in the soul, then all things bring joy to the soul.”
  • St Silouan the Athonite, Writings, IX.15
 
I can tell you where I found happiness

I am eastern rite catholic and do believe we are in the end times. End times studies can be depressing in itself. Besides that I’m getting older and not able to be as active as I used to.

But…
I am so happy that I have found ways to help other people.
Knowing these times are close if not already here, I feel deep inside there will be hundreds of people in my town who will suddenly be destitute.
When I made meals, I make extra and freeze or can them
I’ve collected hygiene items and into ziplock bags
I make heaters/cookers out of soda cans
I bought 100 rosaries, collect prayer cards
In the evenings i knit items because they will be cold
Tea lights in baby jars

All these Are for distribution for those in need.
No personal glory, it is for Gods glory
My reward is peace and happiness and a purpose to keep going on
 
Faustinas_frien said:
I can tell you where I found happiness

I am eastern rite catholic and do believe we are in the end times. End times studies can be depressing in itself. Besides that I’m getting older and not able to be as active as I used to.

But…
I am so happy that I have found ways to help other people.
Knowing these times are close if not already here, I feel deep inside there will be hundreds of people in my town who will suddenly be destitute.
When I made meals, I make extra and freeze or can them
I’ve collected hygiene items and into ziplock bags
I make heaters/cookers out of soda cans
I bought 100 rosaries, collect prayer cards
In the evenings i knit items because they will be cold
Tea lights in baby jars

All these Are for distribution for those in need.
No personal glory, it is for Gods glory
My reward is peace and happiness and a purpose to keep going on
Click to expand...
You must be very happy in knowing that you make God happy too.

God bless you!!!
 
CanMan86 said:
I want to get an eastern perspective on this question. I often struggle with depression and ask myself, “how can I be happy?” I can’t help but feel like I must DO something to feel happy such as feed the poor, have a successful career, be healthy, or something. Thoughts like, “when I do something great like feed poor children in Africa I will feel fulfilled and have purpose in life” run through my mind. Is it necessary to contribute to the lives of others in order to be truly happy? Or can one be happy by simply just being?

I once told an Orthodox friend that I didn’t know what my purpose in life was, that I was still searching for that one thing that would make me fulfilled. He had a pretty interesting response, he said, “the purpose of your life isn’t to do some activity, your life is your purpose.” Pretty good response if you ask me!

I feel I struggle with two ways of thinking about happiness… 1. Is to be some kind of Mother Teresa type person who loves and helps the poor and with this I will be fulfilled through this self-giving act of love.

or
  1. I should learn to find happiness in the present moment and learn that contentment/happiness is found in simply being alive.
When I think back to when I was like like 5 years old I never had feelings of emptiness or depression. I seemed pretty content with life and I was never focused on loving God and neighbor. I was just happy simply being a kid.

I’m not sure where I am going with all this but I guess my question is, how does one be happy?

What about pursuing ones passions? I enjoy playing guitar, writing about music, learning about different cultures…is it OK to find happiness in these things? I know it sounds silly but at the end of the day these are just “things”… I am very confused in my head as you can see. I can’t help but feel guilty if I want to find happiness in doing “things” because they aren’t God and they aren’t an act of loving my neighbor. I end up over thinking things and well… need some advice!!
Click to expand...
The Scriptures say you love your neighbor as you love yourself. I think learning your gifts in playing and writing music is one way to find this love you are seeking. The learning of different cultures is another gift that you can pick up to expand how so many different peoples approach life and God. Not everyone is the same. Perhaps reading about certain saints who also had these same problems you are going through may help you. Read about St. Therese of Liseaux and St. Maria Faustina who have written about their life which transported them into saints. Read about their many struggles with depressions and dealing with their spiritual progress as they had to focus more on what really can make them truly happy despite the many times they had to struggle with these dark moments. Sometimes God grants us these dark moments so that we can turn our attention to ourselves to our relationship with the Lord. The more time we can spend time in knowing ourselves the better I believe we can focus on what will make us truly happy. The key in anyone’s life is really to slow down and find out what this person in you really is. If people only discover this great truth about themselves then I believe it can make all the difference in the world. I wouldn’t listen to those thoughts about feeding the poor in Africa for these thoughts are only trying to convince you to do something you are not able to do. Work with what you have and pray for God to help you to achieve what He wants from you. Listen more to this Love He has stored for you and allow Him to be the giver rather than you to be the giver and grow more into this relationship at this level for the time being.
 
Lots of good replies here.

I’m surprised, though, that no-one has mentioned the Jesus Prayer. Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy is a proven approach to reducing relapse in depression. Unfortunately for us, it is based on Buddhism and other non-christian religions. However, we can learn from some of the principles. Eastern Christian ‘watchfulness’ (nepsis) is similar to mindfulness. Instead of putting ourselves, our thoughts and worries in the foreground, we put Our Saviour there, where He belongs: “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me.” By combining this prayer with our breathing and heartbeat we come to notice those thoughts in the background which can plague us, attacking our peace. With the Holy Name we can let go of or swat away these thoughts, returning again and again to sit at the feet of the Master who loves us and has compassion on us in our weakness.
 
Tybourne said:
Lots of good replies here.

I’m surprised, though, that no-one has mentioned the Jesus Prayer. Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy is a proven approach to reducing relapse in depression. Unfortunately for us, it is based on Buddhism and other non-christian religions. However, we can learn from some of the principles. Eastern Christian ‘watchfulness’ (nepsis) is similar to mindfulness. Instead of putting ourselves, our thoughts and worries in the foreground, we put Our Saviour there, where He belongs: “Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me.” By combining this prayer with our breathing and heartbeat we come to notice those thoughts in the background which can plague us, attacking our peace. With the Holy Name we can let go of or swat away these thoughts, returning again and again to sit at the feet of the Master who loves us and has compassion on us in our weakness.
Click to expand...
Great point! Have any of you ever had the experience of feeling really depressed or anxious or on the verge of desperation or nearly in tears or whatever over something big or small–and just as you are about to react, or take it out on someone or something negatively, simply closing your eyes, breathing deeply a few times, and uttering your own version of something like “Jesus, PLEASE grant me peace right now–that same peace you used to greet everyone with and give so willingly to everyone you ran into when you were on earth. Will you give me that peace please right now?” Then pause for a few seconds–maybe a minute or so and PICTURE Jesus standing there–saying “Peace be with you.” as it says He did so often in scripture. I don’t call this meditation though maybe it technically is–but for me, it’s like a 2 minute thing. But it honestly seems to work for me every time–no promise implied that it would work for everyone. On the other hand, it is kind of a Christian version of an eastern philosophy of positive thinking–or picturing in your mind what you want. Does that make sense?🤷
 
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