Eating in church

[kalt]

What is with parents of preschoolers? Do they think their kids can’t make it 45 minutes without food? Is this their way of keeping the kids quiet?

Today at Mass, a preschooler stood on the kneeler behind me and chewed (with her mouth open) in my ear. Lord only knows how much food was in the crinkly little bag, but I thought she would never stop chewing. I don’t normally “shoot the look”, but the two women responsible for this kid were clueless. They finally told the kid to sit down.

The kid was loud,too, and managed amazing minutes-long monologues, when she wasn’t chewing, of course. Noisy is annoying, but that’s life. Chewing in my ear at Mass, well that’s just over the line.

So what’s with Catholics and bringing food to Mass?

Do other Christian denominations condone this? Do parents of preschoolers bring snacks for their kids at your church?

Is this how parents are raising their kids today? Feed them to keep them quiet? Is this just a Catholic thing?

I’ve been in other churches,and no one brought food. That was in the late 80’s and early 90’s. Have things changed that much?

The people who clean our church must be sick and tired sweeping Cheerios from under the pews.

PS: There is a coffee an’ after Mass. These kids wouldn’t even have to wait to get home to eat.

 

[emeraldcoast]

Just a thought…

Maybe those that sweep up the Cheerios get excited about the amount they pick-up each Sunday because they know that their church is growing and full of God’s children.

God Bless!

 

[redrosetea]

I know a protestant lady that eats M&Ms during church and she falls asleep and drools the choc…she told me she did…That is a new one on me…but you know what…at least she came to church

Perhaps that noisy child may someday say mass…Christ said suffer the little children to come unto me

 

[Coming_Home_1]

As a father of Five soon to be Six! I resent the heartless and selfish thoughts that were occupying your mind during Mass instead of the prayers that we gather together to pray. Since I came into the Catholic Church it is one of the things that I Enjoy is the little noises during the Mass, in all the other Protestant denomination they were so adamant to take the kids away and teach them who nknows what and stuff them full of communion bread! Let the children come and participate in the Mass.

 

[cathopologist]

When i was ‘searching’, i attended a few Protestant churches. I have come across parents with children, giving them something to munch during services. Not that i agree with parents who allow this during Mass, but children will be children.

And no, eating during Mass, even if its kids, is never allowed. Sometimes parents have to understand that without disciplining their children, they risk them to further behavioral problems in the future. Say No when you have to say No to your kids. If they misbehave or disrespect, give them the appropriate punishment needed.

 

[a_cermak]

But, unless you know the child and her family, you might not know special circumstances. Maybe the child is diabetic and needs to eat on a schedule. Maybe the child is autistic and therefore difficult to control, so the food helps. Maybe the child is easily bored, so the parents try to entertain her.

 

[Rightlydivide]

I am glad the kids are in church. I could care less if the little people are munching. I do the custodian once every 8 weeks-saves money that way-but of course I like children.

 

[tGette]

Ultimately…it is wonderful that the children are in church.

Preferably…it would be nice if some how (albeit gradually) the children could learn patience by going to church and not need some external stimuli…especially food.

When I was growing up in the Methodist church my mother would give me the bulletin and have me go through and circle all the letter Es.

I would not be against the children having some activity like this…especially if it was religious related…but again…ideally…the children would learn to sit through Mass without needing something to grab their attention.

It is unrealistic to expect a child (depending on age, of course) to be the most participatory during any church service…especially Mass.

We should deal with the hands we are dealt and hope and pray for better.

I am ashamed to write this…a priest in my area basically kicked a lady and her baby out of church during Mass one Sunday because the child was crying. She definitely should not have been trying to sit there with the crying child…but his response was WAY over the top

 

[RC_Matt]

I know a protestant lady that eats M&Ms during church and she falls asleep and drools the choc…she told me she did…That is a new one on me…but you know what…at least she came to church

Perhaps that noisy child may someday say mass…Christ said suffer the little children to come unto me

I haven’t seen eating, but in our Parish some parents seem to think it’s cool to let toddlers wander around during Mass – and then they have to make a mad dash up the aisle to recover the kid when he tries to go up on the altar. I don’t think anybody really minds and most seem to find it amusing. I don’t really care, but it’s distracting and somehow doesn’t seem appropriate.

What I do find annoying are cell phones ringing, and particularly people who answer the calls. I don’t think anybody is so important that they can’t be away from a telephone for 45 minutes a week.

As long as we’re on the subject, ladies who wear a ton of perfume really suck; so do people who eat loads of GARLIC before midnight Mass (BARF!!!) There should be a commandment or something about that kind of stuff.

 

[redrosetea]

I have seen little ones eat in church. One young mother pratically packs a hamper…I think she was over does it, but she comes to church alone witih 2 tots…I am going to cut her some slack

 

[cathopologist]

I am ashamed to write this…a priest in my area basically kicked a lady and her baby out of church during Mass one Sunday because the child was crying. She definitely should not have been trying to sit there with the crying child…but his response was WAY over the top

That is over the top. Poor lady.

 

[emeraldcoast]

I have seen little ones eat in church. One young mother pratically packs a hamper…I think she was over does it, but she comes to church alone witih 2 tots…I am going to cut her some slack

Hi Redrosetea,

As a mom of two children, that has a military husband that has been deployed quite a lot–THANK YOU!!

Hi tGette,

Your mother was thinking with the seek a letter game! Our church has a children’s wagon in the vestibule with cute cloth bags that have in them a clipboard, crayons and children’s religious coloring packets for the little ones to take into church with them.

God Bless!

 

[churchcamefirst]

When I am in church, I am focused and tend to tune out little aggravations as these.
Remember the devil wants us distracted in church.

 

[Ruthie]

I love the kids, yet I do find feeding the tots at Mass to be annoying. This is for a couple of reasons, both behavioral.

First, most of the feeding happens when the kid is beginning to get noisy. This is rewarding the wrong behavior! It teaches them that being noisy gets rewarded. Bad idea.

A better way to do it would be to break the Mass down into fairly equal chunks of time, and say (for example) “You can have a cookie when Father does (something).” That will get them to focus on the Mass.

Second, training them to expect food at Mass will make it harder for them to learn to fast before Mass. On the other hand, it’s good to learn to expect to get “fed” at Mass…

I like tGette’s story about circling all the E’s. Perhaps one could do this with a cheap book of word-finding puzzles. Maybe some enterprising person can make “Where’s Jesus?” books a la the “Where’s Waldo” series.

Just some ideas from a non-mother; take 'em for what they’re worth. :twocents:

Ruthie

 

[tGette]

When I am in church, I am focused and tend to tune out little aggravations as these.
Remember the devil wants us distracted in church.

Yeah…I try to do this too.

Honestly…at my parish…(thanks be to God!) there is no problem with children acting up. I see no evidence of kids eating or being a distraction. If a baby cries, the parent takes their child to the “cry room”.

All the kids who are currently attending CCD at any given age, they sit patiently…though maybe not the most attentive…patiently nonetheless!

We must be blessed at my parish (well…duh…we are…but you know what I mean)!!!

 

[tGette]

I love the kids, yet I do find feeding the tots at Mass to be annoying. This is for a couple of reasons, both behavioral.

First, most of the feeding happens when the kid is beginning to get noisy. This is rewarding the wrong behavior! It teaches them that being noisy gets rewarded. Bad idea.

A better way to do it would be to break the Mass down into fairly equal chunks of time, and say (for example) “You can have a cookie when Father does (something).” That will get them to focus on the Mass.

Second, training them to expect food at Mass will make it harder for them to learn to fast before Mass. On the other hand, it’s good to learn to expect to get “fed” at Mass…

I like tGette’s story about circling all the E’s. Perhaps one could do this with a cheap book of word-finding puzzles. Maybe some enterprising person can make “Where’s Jesus?” books a la the “Where’s Waldo” series.

Just some ideas from a non-mother; take 'em for what they’re worth. :twocents:

Ruthie

The wisdom only the Holy Spirit can give!

Very true about the discipline of fasting before Mass!

I like what you said about being “fed”

 

[kalt]

I love the circling letters idea. It takes time, concentration, and it’s quiet. Why do parents of boys bring action figures, for crying out loud. Let’s just tell them to make lazer and crash noices. lol

Most of the parents at my parish have enough sense to remove a screaming kid. Some, though.

The priest doesn’t kick them out, though I know he has to bit his tongue at times. (He’s said as much.) So one of the women in charge of babysitting nicely suggest the service to the parents.

I grew up with 3 brothers and sisters. None of us was allowed to bring food or a toy. If my mother could do it with 4…

IMO, it’s really about the parents’ ability and desire to expect certain behavior of their kids. Some parents apparently believe that a 3-yr-old is a fairly incapable little person. They’re selling her so short.

Food, imo, should never be used to treat boredom. What a thing to teach your kids!

Ultimately…it is wonderful that the children are in church.

Preferably…it would be nice if some how (albeit gradually) the children could learn patience by going to church and not need some external stimuli…especially food.

When I was growing up in the Methodist church my mother would give me the bulletin and have me go through and circle all the letter Es.

I would not be against the children having some activity like this…especially if it was religious related…but again…ideally…the children would learn to sit through Mass without needing something to grab their attention.

It is unrealistic to expect a child (depending on age, of course) to be the most participatory during any church service…especially Mass.

We should deal with the hands we are dealt and hope and pray for better.

I am ashamed to write this…a priest in my area basically kicked a lady and her baby out of church during Mass one Sunday because the child was crying. She definitely should not have been trying to sit there with the crying child…but his response was WAY over the top

 

[kalt]

Prayers. What prayers? Was there a Mass going on? I missed it. All I could hear was someone chewing with her mouth open.

Seriously, I can’t believe that when a kid is allowed to behave this badly, anyone could possibly find fault with the other people in the church who were annoyed by this borish behavior. Amazing.

I guess standards really have declined since my child was a preschooler.

As a father of Five soon to be Six! I resent the heartless and selfish thoughts that were occupying your mind during Mass instead of the prayers that we gather together to pray. Since I came into the Catholic Church it is one of the things that I Enjoy is the little noises during the Mass, in all the other Protestant denomination they were so adamant to take the kids away and teach them who nknows what and stuff them full of communion bread! Let the children come and participate in the Mass.

 

[kalt]

You have me LOL.

There are so many pet peeves when we’re around that many people in close quarters.

How about the people who sneeze into their right hand and then offer it to you as a sign of peace. Thanks, but no thanks.

I haven’t seen eating, but in our Parish some parents seem to think it’s cool to let toddlers wander around during Mass – and then they have to make a mad dash up the aisle to recover the kid when he tries to go up on the altar. I don’t think anybody really minds and most seem to find it amusing. I don’t really care, but it’s distracting and somehow doesn’t seem appropriate.

What I do find annoying are cell phones ringing, and particularly people who answer the calls. I don’t think anybody is so important that they can’t be away from a telephone for 45 minutes a week.

As long as we’re on the subject, ladies who wear a ton of perfume really suck; so do people who eat loads of GARLIC before midnight Mass (BARF!!!) There should be a commandment or something about that kind of stuff.

 

[kalt]

When I am in church, I am focused and tend to tune out little aggravations as these.
Remember the devil wants us distracted in church.

Dang! I knew that kid was a little devil.