Eating meat on Friday in Lent

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Tonci3D

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Hi,

I know that eating meat on Friday in general is not O.K, and that outside lent it is possible to eat meat in some situation, and replace it mercy.

This Friday I have a big, important business diner, I can not move it to another day, and I can not miss it. The menu will be mostly meat (no exceptions), and I can not change it too (my boss and more bigger shots the he decided all that).

I have no problem with staying a little hungry, and skip meat, but I am afraid that this could easily entice (seduce, I hope translation is good) people.

The reason is, although I live in mostly catholic country, people are more traditional catholics (if even that), and they also find me weird already, since I have already 4 children, since my wife and me are open to life, and they know I am devoted catholic.

I have only two realistic options:
  1. Not eat meat, and risk that people get enticed ( And I pretty sure they will)
  2. Eat meat, but I will do it only if it is allowed by churched (in special cases like this one).
Any other options (like skipping diner, or ordering other menu) is not so fine in practice.

Please, give me advice, and tell me (but if you know for sure), does Church allow to replace eating meat in this situations, even during Lent?
 
Tonci3D said:
Hi,

I know that eating meat on Friday in general is not O.K, and that outside lent it is possible to eat meat in some situation, and replace it mercy.
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I don’t know what the discipline is in your country. In the US abstinence from meat is required only on Ash Wednesday and all Fridays of Lent, unless a Solemnity (Like the Anunciation March 25) falls on that day. Other Fridays of the year Catholics are expected to do acts of mercy or penance but this is not binding under pain of sin.
  1. Not eat meat, and risk that people get enticed ( And I pretty sure they will)
2quote]
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not sure what you mean by this
if you are not the one cooking and serving the meat you are not doing anything to cause anyone else to sin.
everyone involved is an adult and able to make their own decisions.

don’t forget the rule of charity as well, and if you do choose simply to eat the side dishes and skip the meat, you do it quietly, not drawing attention to yourself, or in a way that implies criticism of anyone else.
 
Espanol? I’m afraid I do not understand the verb you are trying to use.

Is it possible to eat a large lunch to make up for the problem?
 
puzzleannie, that is a discipline in my country.

I believe that word entice is not a good translation of what I meant. The thing is that everybody knows eating meat on Friday (especially in Lent) is Church order, and they all say, you know, it’s O.K., but on a such socially important diner as I am going to, they will say that it is special occasion, and I should eat meat. If I do not, they will consider it as an insult, and think I am (like in a sect, like Jehovah witness or something).

And I can not avoid meat without everybody noticing, the meals are all meat (if I could, I would not have a problem).
 
My understanding is that this is a fixed course meal, correct? It is not up to each individual to order, but has already been set. I would try contacting your boss and see if it is possible to have a vegetarian option for yourself, or even contact the restaurant. If not, you should simply ‘eat around the meat’ on your plate.

I know this is hard - at my job, we had a cook-off. Some Catholics decided to eat meat then and abstain the following week for the Solemnity of the Annunciation. But I realized abstaining can be easy, and it is the challenging times, when even others are giving in, that Christ calls us to stay strong. Have faith, try to offer changes, and if not, then make sacrifices for Christ. Remember, even those who are tormented, persecuted, or abused because of Him shall receive His grace and love.
 
19bob50 said:
Why not absent on another day than Friday?
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Because Fridays are special - Our Lord died on a Friday, and so we are obligated to abstain from meat on Fridays to mark the day as significant. Like Sunday is the day He rose again, and so we are obligated to worship at Mass on that day. You can’t move these things to another day - Mondays or Thursdays aren’t the same thing at all as Fridays or Sundays. It would be like ‘celebrating’ New Year on 4th of January instead of the 1st.

As for not eating meat - it’s incredibly rude of your hosts to not cater for vegetarians and offer a selection of non-meat dishes.

Just tell everyone that you simply don’t feel like eating meat - why should it be an insult? If you didn’t have one of the salads or didn’t have bread because you didn’t feel like eating it would that be an insult?

The insult is that they do not respect Church teaching AND that they do not respect that some people just don’t eat meat at every meal!
 
Tonci3D said:
…
I believe that word entice is not a good translation of what I meant. The thing is that everybody knows eating meat on Friday (especially in Lent) is Church order, and they all say, you know, it’s O.K., but on a such socially important diner as I am going to, they will say that it is special occasion, and I should eat meat. If I do not, they will consider it as an insult, and think I am (like in a sect, like Jehovah witness or something).

And I can not avoid meat without everybody noticing, the meals are all meat (if I could, I would not have a problem).
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Hello Tonci3D,

If you are certain that you are going to be in such a difficult position, explain your situation to the pastor (not an associate priest but only the pastor) at your parish. He can dispense you from this obligation if he finds your situation warrants it, or change your penance to something else for that day. See canon 1245 in the Code of Canon Law:

“Without prejudice to the right of diocesan bishops mentioned in can. 87, for a just cause and according to the prescripts of the diocesan bishop, a pastor can grant in individual cases a dispensation from the obligation of observing a feast day or a day of penance or can grant a commutation of the obligation into other pious works. …”

Thanks for your time.
Dan
 
Right the Pastor can dispense you.

Though it is important to take into consideration of scandal (such can be easily forgotten)…to the other Catholics there…who do not know you have a dispensation …but who know you are a Catholic who lives his Faith…

As Paul notes in one of his letters…if our eating will cause our brother to stumble…one should not eat…

Such can be further discussed with your Pastor…
 
so bring the whole thing to your pastor…he can perhaps help you judge (do you have to go?..is something scandalous?..if it is not sinful to go should he give you a dispensation so you eat meat? if so should you announce it? or if you can go…just not eat meat?..etc)
 
Go and do not eat the meat. If someone has a problem with it, it is their problem, not yours. If questioned, just say “I do not eat meat on the Fridays of Lent”. .

If they ask why? It is a form of penance. If you have to repeat the whole Crucifixion story, make it simple. I cannot imagine anyone rude enough, not to respect your beliefs at a “business meeting”. Not the place to get into a theological discussion.
 
“Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.”

Even if the (unimaginable) worst case scenario occurs, and you lose your job because you have so offended the host at this business dinner, the Lord will have a greater plan for you and a great reward in heaven.

Even if you have to take a full serving of food, eat the non-meat garnish only, and hide some meat in your napkin, don’t eat the meat, my friend!

I find that we can worry about these scenarios so much before they actually occur, then in retrospect, we see that somehow situation worked itself out.

Have faith, my friend, and god bless!!👍
 
Unless the folks in your firm or the clients are very anti-Catholic (in which case I would be looking for another firm), it should be no problem to abstain from the meat and eat every thing else. Have a big lunch or snack afterwards.

A lot of folks are vegetarian or who eat very little meat. The firm should be tolerant and the restaurant or caterer should accomodate other diets.

Or as others have mentioned try to get an individual dispensation from your pastor.
 
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