Elderly Parents and Baptism

[marlap2]

My parents have always been agnostic at best, but raised their three daughters to choose whatever they wanted to believe. There was always a combination of gentle? chiding about Christians (they are hypocrites, go to church to make business deals, sin all week, and go to confession then sin again, and all that) They never went to church themselves.

Despite all of this, one sister married a Mennonite and has a very conservative lifestyle. The other two (my sister and I) are practicing Catholics, and happy to be home. We are both in love with our church, and would really love one day to have our parents be open to baptism.

Why? They are both so afraid of death now. They worry about it constantly. They are open to prayer, when my sister and I are with them, we quite often pray over them, and they always cry and are open. My mother has gone to Mass with us a few times. My father says the church would go on fire if he walked in the door.

But their lack of peace is disconcerting. My mother quite often says she wakes up in the middle of the night with “hymns” in her head. Sometimes she’s open and sometimes not at all. My father is depressed and afraid.

My question is, can our priest baptize them, without the obligations of being Catholic? They may believe in God, accept the Trinity, but not be ready to follow all the tenets of the Catholic Church. Can anyone help with this? I realize in an emergency, my sisters or I could use the Trinitarian formula and baptize them, but for the sake of their peace (they seem to have a new-found respect for priests, yeah!) I would really prefer them to have a religious baptize them.

thank you, and bless you all.

 

[1ke]

My question is, can our priest baptize them, without the obligations of being Catholic?

No. Your priest can baptize them into the Catholic Church. Your priest cannot baptize them if they have no intention of being a Catholic.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

My parents have always been agnostic at best, but raised their three daughters to choose whatever they wanted to believe. There was always a combination of gentle? chiding about Christians (they are hypocrites, go to church to make business deals, sin all week, and go to confession then sin again, and all that) They never went to church themselves.

Despite all of this, one sister married a Mennonite and has a very conservative lifestyle. The other two (my sister and I) are practicing Catholics, and happy to be home. We are both in love with our church, and would really love one day to have our parents be open to baptism.

Why? They are both so afraid of death now. They worry about it constantly. They are open to prayer, when my sister and I are with them, we quite often pray over them, and they always cry and are open. My mother has gone to Mass with us a few times. My father says the church would go on fire if he walked in the door.

But their lack of peace is disconcerting. My mother quite often says she wakes up in the middle of the night with “hymns” in her head. Sometimes she’s open and sometimes not at all. My father is depressed and afraid.

My question is, can our priest baptize them, without the obligations of being Catholic? They may believe in God, accept the Trinity, but not be ready to follow all the tenets of the Catholic Church. Can anyone help with this? I realize in an emergency, my sisters or I could use the Trinitarian formula and baptize them, but for the sake of their peace (they seem to have a new-found respect for priests, yeah!) I would really prefer them to have a religious baptize them.

thank you, and bless you all.

Keep asking them to Mass. Keep praying for them. It is horrible to see the end of a life with no belief in God, isn’t it? I am so glad that their lack of faith did not keep all of their daughters from finding faith! Kind of a little sense of humor from God! Even if your parents didn’t help, He did it all by Himself!

It sounds as if they are more frightened than believing in God. If you can talk to them, keep a dialogue open, tell them that there is help from God for their fears. Would they wear a green scapular? It helps gain faith for unbelievers.

Ask everyone you know to pray for them. Fear can lead them to the foot of the cross, but the Church can’t just baptize them for the sake of it.

 

[ItsLove]

I may be (completely and totally) wrong, and I understand that of course you would want a preist to do it, but can’t anyone baptize someone? As long as the person doing it is baptized, I was told they can do it. Obviously there would be no record and the person being baptized has to consent.

 

[joanofarc2008]

This is a conversation your priest must have with them - I think that sometimes it is easy for us to say that one has no intention of being Catholic but sometimes we do not always understand what that means. Yes, your father may not be ready but maybe your mother might. Your priest is probably much better able to have this conversation and should.

 

[JamestheOlder]

I may be (completely and totally) wrong, and I understand that of course you would want a preist to do it, but can’t anyone baptize someone? As long as the person doing it is baptized, I was told they can do it. Obviously there would be no record and the person being baptized has to consent.

Please…No. Don’t even consider this unless you are responsible enough to go to the local parish and register the Baptism.

Even in danger of death, this step should be taken with great caution. The person who DESIRES Baptism at death’s time, who is not baptized with water, still receives the Sacrament…called “baptism of desire”…same as for a Catechumen who dies before receiving the ordinary application of the Sacrament.

But…please…no “secret” baptisms, or baptisms for one’s “good”.

Also, to correct a misunderstanding…the one who performs the Baptism need NOT be a baptized person. Anyone CAN do it…but that is not a broad license to do so.

G-d will provide. Go talk to your priest.

 

[ItsLove]

Please…No. Don’t even consider this unless you are responsible enough to go to the local parish and register the Baptism.

Even in danger of death, this step should be taken with great caution. The person who DESIRES Baptism at death’s time, who is not baptized with water, still receives the Sacrament…called “baptism of desire”…same as for a Catechumen who dies before receiving the ordinary application of the Sacrament.

But…please…no “secret” baptisms, or baptisms for one’s “good”.

Also, to correct a misunderstanding…the one who performs the Baptism need NOT be a baptized person. Anyone CAN do it…but that is not a broad license to do so.

G-d will provide. Go talk to your priest.

Oh of course! I wasn’t meaning to recommend it. I’m sorry!

 

[admonsta]

Do you think they would be open to the suggestion of having catechesis? My husband was, as long as nobody was pushing him to convert, he was happy to talk to our priest regularly and learn exactly what the church teaches.

He’s now becoming a Catholic in a couple of weeks. He now understands the church much better than before, and accepts that it’s most likely true. He is still worried that he might have got it wrong but his biggest fear is oblivion, and he’s learning to spot the evidence that God does indeed exist and there’s a place called Heaven that we should really aim for.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Do you think they would be open to the suggestion of having catechesis? My husband was, as long as nobody was pushing him to convert, he was happy to talk to our priest regularly and learn exactly what the church teaches.

He’s now becoming a Catholic in a couple of weeks. He now understands the church much better than before, and accepts that it’s most likely true. He is still worried that he might have got it wrong but his biggest fear is oblivion, and he’s learning to spot the evidence that God does indeed exist and there’s a place called Heaven that we should really aim for.

Praise God!

:extrahappy::dancing::clapping:

It’s great that your priest has time to do this.

 

[LSK]

do you think they would be open to the suggestion of having catechesis? My husband was, as long as nobody was pushing him to convert, he was happy to talk to our priest regularly and learn exactly what the church teaches.

He’s now becoming a catholic in a couple of weeks. He now understands the church much better than before, and accepts that it’s most likely true. He is still worried that he might have got it wrong but his biggest fear is oblivion, and he’s learning to spot the evidence that god does indeed exist and there’s a place called heaven that we should really aim for.

what a great suggestion!!!

 

[marlap2]

Do you think they would be open to the suggestion of having catechesis? My husband was, as long as nobody was pushing him to convert, he was happy to talk to our priest regularly and learn exactly what the church teaches.

He’s now becoming a Catholic in a couple of weeks. He now understands the church much better than before, and accepts that it’s most likely true. He is still worried that he might have got it wrong but his biggest fear is oblivion, and he’s learning to spot the evidence that God does indeed exist and there’s a place called Heaven that we should really aim for.

Congratulations, admonsta! Praise God!

My parents are now in their mid-eighties. My mother is in the beginning stages of early-onset dementia. She is very astute, (reads 2-3 books a week) but you can see how she is losing it from time to time… My dad is very active for his age… I am trusting that God will provide. I am hoping to be able to share the series “Catholicism” with my mother over the next few months. They are not able to do a formal catechism as they go to bed early, and our priests, (God Bless Them) are very busy.

Thank for your answers. I do have friends outside of the Church (pastors in the Protestant side) who would be happy to baptize, I am sure, but what can I say … “fullness of truth, and the Eucharist… need I say more?” Hopefully God provides time and grace…

Blessings

 

[Viki63]

My father says the church would go on fire if he walked in the door.

But their lack of peace is disconcerting.
.

It sounds as if your father, at least, doesn’t understand the faith and may feel guilty. Why would he say the church would be on fire if he walked in? His sins are not worse than anyone else’s.
Perhaps you could explain the faith in a simple way - that Jesus died for our sins, and He is willing to forgive them if we only ask Him to. There is no need to fear death if He is on our side. Ask them if they’d mind if a priest came and talked to them.

There was a woman in the hospital where I worked, she had brain cancer and was terrified of dying. This was before I was Catholic, but I explained it simply, gave her a Bible, and she asked Christ into her heart and was immediately filled with peace. She passed away shortly afterward. It is amazing what Jesus can do, even working through our ignorance.

 

[marlap2]

Thank you all for your continued prayers. I know and believe that our Lord hears and responds to every prayer uttered with sincerity and from the heart.

I pray, with my sister for my parents every day, and I have seen healing and a ever growing trust in Him, whom they do not know yet. When I became a Catholic in the spring of 1998, they actually thought I was certifiably crazy, and told my sisters so. They were unwilling to listen or respond to the joy that I had within me. They mocked me to my sisters, but not to my face. They were sympathetic to my husband, who is an ex-catholic. Of course they did not go to my/and my son’s baptism.

Through prayer and real miracles, my sister came into the church four years ago this spring. This however, was a time for my parents to be so happy and really have hope, as my sister struggled with many issues. She is a joyful, Christ-filled, Eucharistic loving Catholic. Now after all this time, my parents are open to prayer, and even my remaining sister asks me to pray for her. (She is quick to let me know that God said no though).

I pray the prayer of St. Francis most often when visiting them, that I remain a little vessel of God’s love and patience with them. It’s hard to see them suffering, but even our Lord reminds me that His mother and his best friends were witnesses to his own suffering and persecution, and to unite my prayers with them.

My father grew up in a very anti-Catholic environment, so probably his past memories hurt somewhat. I do speak to them about God’s enduring love and mercy whenever a door of listening is open, and I absolutely know that your continued prayers will help to soften their stony hearts. I have even noticed a bit of a change this week. Some real healing took place yesterday. Bless you all for hearing me…

Since my baptism there have been four others from my family who have come into the fullness of Faith, although not all practice as they should yet. (Some are in their 20s…)

Blessings
Marla

 

[marlap2]

Please…No. Don’t even consider this unless you are responsible enough to go to the local parish and register the Baptism.

But…please…no “secret” baptisms, or baptisms for one’s “good”.

.

I would never ever do anything that was outside of the tenets of my faith.

If my parents desired baptism, and yet were not open to the Catholic Church and all it offers, I would phone one of my lovely Protestant brothers who would be more than happy to welcome them.

Because I believe, ONE BAPTISM, for the forgiveness of sins. As long as the protestant church uses the trinitarian formula, their baptisms are valid.

Thanks and Blessings for you!