EMHCs: what do you do when people approach you in the communion line for blessings?

[Lepanto]

EMHCs: what do you do when people approach you in the communion line for blessings?

Do you “bless” said people? If so, what do you say/do? If not, how do you get out of “blessing” them without causing any embarrassment?

How about young children (who presumably can’t receive communion) yet come up for blessings?

Have you had any instruction from you pastor on this one way or the other?

 

[Shike]

I’m not an EMHC but I’ve read a topic on here before about this very subject. One answer I thought was particularly good was to just say “Peace be with you”.

peace,
Michael

 

[ljprevo]

I would hope and pray that EMHC’s are not giving a blessing or even mocking one.

Lay people are not to give blessings.

Pope Benedict the Sixteenth before his Papal Installation answered this question saying only Deacons, Priests, and Bishops may confer blessings in any situation although he pointed out that a blessing during the Mass is redundant since the Mass it self is a blessing.

 

[Holly3278]

I would hope that they would give them a blessing somehow.

 

[Lepanto]

I would hope that they would give them a blessing somehow.

But what if they’re not allowed to, as ljprevo suggests?

(ljprevo – can you cite your source?

 

[MusicMan]

I asked my pastor about this, as the “blessing” of children who do not yet receive is rampant in our parish (taught rather pridefully, in fact, by the religious ed coordinator for the younger grades – you should see her beam as her little row of first graders goes up with their arms crossed). I commented that I didn’t feel comfortable “blessing.” He told me to make the Sign of the Cross on their forehead and say nothing. I again commented that I didn’t feel comfortable “blessing.” He said to me, “Don’t worry. You’re not.”

Problem solved. And, I’m so good at “not blessing” that a lot of parents move their kids to another line when I distribute Communion because they’ve figured out that I “don’t do it right.”

Problem solved.

 

[Lepanto]

I asked my pastor about this, as the “blessing” of children who do not yet receive is rampant in our parish (taught rather pridefully, in fact, by the religious ed coordinator for the younger grades – you should see her beam as her little row of first graders goes up with their arms crossed). I commented that I didn’t feel comfortable “blessing.” He told me to make the Sign of the Cross on their forehead and say nothing. I again commented that I didn’t feel comfortable “blessing.” He said to me, “Don’t worry. You’re not.”

Problem solved. And, I’m so good at “not blessing” that a lot of parents move their kids to another line when I distribute Communion because they’ve figured out that I “don’t do it right.”

Problem solved.

I know that the intentions of both you and your priest are noble, but subterfuge within the Mass hardly solves the problem. Allowing or actually tricking people to think something false is very problematic.

Moreover, these first graders will grow up to be parents and religious ed. coordinators, and they will just propagate the fallacy with their own children/students.

The real solution in this case, is for your pastor to properly catechize his parishioners, starting with the religious ed. coordinator.

 

[thistle]

I know that the intentions of both you and your priest are noble, but subterfuge within the Mass hardly solves the problem. Allowing or actually tricking people to think something false is very problematic.

Moreover, these first graders will grow up to be parents and religious ed. coordinators, and they will just propagate the fallacy with their own children/students.

The real solution in this case, is for your pastor to properly catechize his parishioners, starting with the religious ed. coordinator.

It probably depends on what is meant by a “blessing”.
For example, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a parent at bedtime making the sign of the cross on their child’s forehead and saying God bless you.

 

[Shike]

I’m not an EMHC but I’ve read a topic on here before about this very subject. One answer I thought was particularly good was to just say “Peace be with you”.

peace,
Michael

I’m pretty sure this isn’t mimicking a blessing… so it’d be fine, right?

 

[MusicMan]

I know that the intentions of both you and your priest are noble, but subterfuge within the Mass hardly solves the problem. Allowing or actually tricking people to think something false is very problematic.

Moreover, these first graders will grow up to be parents and religious ed. coordinators, and they will just propagate the fallacy with their own children/students.

The real solution in this case, is for your pastor to properly catechize his parishioners, starting with the religious ed. coordinator.

I agree wholeheartedly. I’m not sure the pastor really cares one way or another. More likely, he gave me the best answer he could to keep the boat from rocking.

Because I don’t distribute all that often, and most parents are away that I’m not playing by their “expectations,” I don’t have to deal with the dillema that much. Further, if I only sow one seed of doubt about the propriety of the emHC blessing, then I might be doing far more for the common good than the current pastor could trying to take this head on.

 

[Lepanto]

It probably depends on what is meant by a “blessing”.
For example, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a parent at bedtime making the sign of the cross on their child’s forehead and saying God bless you.

Right, we’re talking about EMHCs giving “blessings” in the communion line.

 

[Joe_Kelley]

I do the same as I do at the homes. Hold my hand over their head and say May God bless you and go with you this week. In the home visits, I find non-Catholic relatives especially appreciative of a blessing, and surely I can bless as well as their minister does. It is an excellent opportunity to include them in some Catholic prayer.]

I had one man, non-Catholic, come up with his wife, who is Catholic, every Sunday for three years and request a blessing. After three years he joined RCIA and was baptized at age 85.

 

[Joannm]

Around here we very rarely see people coming up with arms crossed for a blessing. In our parish HS, which has many non Catholic students, they are told to come up in the line but just pass by without a blessning or they could bow to the Blessed Sacrament if they so wished. The reason they tell them to come up is so that kids don’t have to climb over each other. Apparently that caused some commotion in the past.

 

[Newbie2]

We give blessings in our parish, per the Pastor’s OK.

It’s up to the EME, that’s what we call them anyway, to use whatever they wish, “God bless you” is common.

Redundant or not, that’s what we do.

 

[tcraig]

When my husband served as an EMHC at a previous parish, the instructions given by the priest were that they could say “God bless you” or “May God bless you” or somesuch phrase, but they absolutely could not move their hands anywhere near the person or touch the person. This was to avoid any type of confusion with the priestly blessing.

What usually happened is that if he was getting ready to distribute the Host, he’d already have his fingers on it (or near it). If someone walked up to him with their arms crossed, he wouldn’t even move his hand away from the bowl but simply say “God bless you”.

Sometimes people would wait for “more” but he’d just smile and they’d eventually move on.

This was a very orthodox military priest, who only used EMHC’s because it was a shared-use chapel and the protestants were always breathing down our necks because they had the next service time. So I trust his advice, and think it makes perfect sense. I also don’t think there are any “official” documents out there on this, either.

 

[kage_ar]

Question for the OP.

You see an old woman, her car has died on the side of the road and she is walking to the gas station. You offer her a ride, she accepts - she says “God bless you” - do you tell her that because she is not a Priest, she cannot say this?

 

[thistle]

Right, we’re talking about EMHCs giving “blessings” in the communion line.

But if all they are saying is God bless you that’s not a formal blessing which is restricted to the ordained so why would that be a cause for concern. What would be a concern is if they were trying to do the type of blessing only permitted to be done by priests.

 

[MusicMan]

The emsHC blessing the manner of the ordained isn’t even really the issue. It’s a symptom of the actual problem, which is the non-Communicants coming up to get a blessing. Neither bishops, priests, deacons, religious, nor emsHC should be blessing non-Communicants during the distribution of Holy Communion. They should be distributing Holy Communion.

My five year old niece is the daughter of a semi-lapsed Catholic and a non-baptized person. One day, she asked her mother where God lived. So, my sister-in-law says to her Catholic husband, we better take her to church. She got upset because at “snack time” she wasn’t allowed to go up and get a “cookie” like everyone else.

OK, she’s five. But we’ve become afraid of hurting people’s feelings in the same way (and she’s five, she got over it), so we offer them something else, like some sort of “consolation prize.” It’s a reflection in our churches of the American trophy society.

Rather, the Church should stop succombing to this, and lead the charge to eradicate the trophy society mentality in the US.

 

[Matariel]

I would hope that they would give them a blessing somehow.

Laity have no authority to bless in public liturgy. Only priests and bishops (and during Eucharistic benediction, deacons) people and places in public liturgy.

Geez. Next thing you know the extraordinary ministers of Holy Communion will be trying to say the Consecration!

 

[Cristiano]

I just keep my hands on the sacred vessel, I look at them in the eyes and I say “Receive the Spirit of Jesus Christ in your heart.” If it is a small child I bend down to be closer to their eye level and I say the same thing. Of all the people that I have seen I have the impression that very few listen to the words that I say. It might also have to do a lot with my Italian accent.