Empaths continued from June 2018: Using Sensitivity as a God-Given Skill

[LadyButterfly]

Hello again!

I opened up this topic in June, and quite frankly, I was afraid of what answers I would get. I was pleasantly surprised! Thank you to all who responded. I chose “liked” on a bunch of them that resonated with me and helped me. I also wanted to answer some of them, but since the topic was closed, I have to start over. I wanted to answer the reply of someone who said I couldn’t have received all the sacraments but one, as I said in my first post. I could be missing something in my statement, so I will clarify. I was just thinking of the seven sacraments: Baptism; Penance; Communion; Confirmation; Marriage; Blessing of the Sick (before a surgery)…so the last one, thanking God, I have missed would be last rites. I’m sorry if I missed anything. Anyway…I’m a married Catholic woman who’s been married for almost 15 years. So, I just wanted to let you know for sure I’m not male, or in the clergy, or anything like that.

Next…I want to revisit an idea that a lot of people responded about: the fact that empathy can be considered a gift from God and should be used wisely for His will. I was really feeling that in my heart as well. (As a side note, I actually think the pop culture widely used “empath” term is really not a good word for it. I think that it’s such a complex and random skill that there really is no actual term for it. Sometimes the gut feelings are so strong though, that the experience of it bears significant discussion. I think we could combine everyone’s replies to my original post and form a great definition!)

Someone had responded that empathy is “God allowing us to know someone else’s experience.” Wow! I liked that! Sometimes, when someone who is sensitive to other people’s moods, words, or actions will get such a strong feeling about the sum total of all of them that they feel they really know for sure what’s behind those behaviors, and then that makes them feel nuts. Especially when they talk it out with other people who want concrete proof. But if all the information is coming from God, then maybe it’s not so nuts. This leads me to a good question for all you hypersensitive empathetic folks out there. When you have the gut instinct feeling, and you feel like you know you’ve really got a handle on what’s going on with a person, and you really want to help them, or address the situation, but all you have are the sum total of the signals in their speech patterns or behaviors…should you approach them with a question that might draw out what is going on with them so you could help? Or is it best to wait for them to say something?

 

[Roseeurekacross]

Hi again. Just be cautious of the new age definition of empath. I think the catholic definition would be compassion and loving your neighbour. That puts us in touch with the tribulations of others. If our hearts are cold, we miss so many things.

The other thing is we cannot take credit for helping others out of bad situations, we must allow God to work through us and give all glory to God.
I would pray for them.

 

[LadyButterfly]

Well said. I agree. I have stopped reading all of the articles on the internet regarding empaths which I had started reading after looking for an answer as to why I seemed to get overwhelming feelings about certain things without being able to put together all of the proof. I think there’s something to high sensitivity and empathy, but you’re right, to stay on track we have to remember it is a gift from God when we experience it. Things I have sensed have been proven correct, at times, and other times, are either unclear or wrong; so you’re right, we have to remember to try to discern exactly what is coming from God and not other influences. Thanks for your response!

 

[adgloriam]

You have to understand that certain personalities are more prone to high sensitivity. The branch of psychology dealing with “theory of personality” normally studies and develops on the concept. If you haven’t done a test, understanding your personality type can help - there are several models for personality but the following usually yields good results and serves as an entry point to the field https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

Then, regarding feelings and passions, catholic doctrine has a wealthy tradition in dealing with those. In a nutshell, you are to have control over your passions and feelings.

Lastly, being “understanding” or having “empathy” towards others, can at times be considered a God given gift but also a natural trait of person. It depends. Now, you can take the course of science, or you can meditate on the wealthy catholic doctrine. You shouldn’t, however, research “new age concepts” without previously endowing yourself with the knowledge and tools of science and catholic culture.

In conclusion, it’s a valid avenue of self-reflection you are taking, and indeed being sensitive and having empathy can be good things. Just don’t loose those talents and waste your time on misleading new age concepts.

God bless.

 

[LadyButterfly]

Thank you, you have a lot of good points here.Also thanks for the link. I did take a test once, but for some reason I never got the results back.

Balancing the high sensitivity with Catholicism when many people you interact with are not sensitive is difficult. People close to me have a tendency to say, “Oh, you’re just being dramatic.”, but when I’m proven right they have nothing to say or just think its coincidence. But I can name many over the course of my lifetime where gut feelings were proven by unfolding circumstances.

I definitely believe that the overriding consideration for my life is Catholicism. I have a book called The Catechism of the Catholic Church which I refer to for help with daily life. The book says clairvoyance is not accepted. However, there must be a fine line. I saw a documentary with Alanis Morrisette and Dr. Elaine N. Aron, Ph.D., about high sensitivity and there is a lot of scientific research behind it. Basically some people pay more attention to situations and people and observe more; catalog their entire life experience of observations mentally so they are able to access them all to quickly compare them to something they currently are seeing. It makes sense thinking about it that way. I bet it can be learned, but also some may have a proclivity to it.

On the New Age side with the crystals and shielding techniques that are all over the internet, that seems to create more confusion than anything. Thanks for the reply!

 

[adgloriam]

when many people you interact with are not sensitive

For you and everyone else. In a sense they are the contrary of you (compatibility/affinity is an extension to the personality types). But there’s something to be learned from those different of us. Catholic doctrine here holds very well, look at the spiritual works of mercy.

The book says clairvoyance is not accepted.

The analogues (that are completely different in essence) are a tough issue and somewhat an advanced aspect within mystic theology. Do you understand catholic doctrine enough to think in those terms? If something of an extraordinary nature happens a catholic should very prudent. In short: go to confession and avoid sin. [Perhaps you could research the mystics of the catholic church, try going from there.]

a lot of scientific research behind it

And that research is labeled Personality Psychology. Feel free to discard the term “high sensitivity”, it’s just an adjective and a noun, quantifying a trait. It’s not a “concept” to be considered a field in itself. (That entire taxonomy is misleading.)

Alanis Morrisette and Dr. Elaine N. Aron

I can’t recommend enough gaudete et exsultate by pope Francis. It’s recent and really really good, please try going from there, you’ll love it and will find plenty of answers you’ll enjoy and rejoice in.

God bless.

Thanks for the reply!

You are very welcome