P
puzzleannie
Guest
It is that time of year folks, when we will be inviting family and friends to celebrate sacramental milestones with us, Inevitably many of those guests will have little or no familiarity with the Catholic Church, the Mass, the Sacraments and our customs and beliefs. This applies especially to family members who are nominal Catholics but do not attend Church (except for these events) and should know better, but don’t.
Weddings: please use the period of preparation to find out what is required (or what is forbidden) as far as dress, witnesses, photos and videos, songs, music, readings and other aspects of the ceremony. This is a sacrament celebrated inside or outside Mass, with a liturgy and a ritual that pertains, There is no room for do-it-yourself.
Girls, please LOOK in a MIRROR when trying on wedding garb, especially a 3-way mirror, wearing the proper foundation garments for the style you have chosen. Be very, very honest and critical of your appearance. This is a wedding, not a prom, not a disco, and not Vegas.
If your photographer/videographer does not have equipment that allows him/her to use a zoom lens and fewer lights than required by night baseball, get another photographer. The purpose of this production is to get married, not produce a documentary for the Cannes film festival. The priest and the bride and groom are the players here, we don’t want to watch the back of the photographer at work. better suggestion: find a parish where photos and videos are forbidden during Mass and take posed pix afterwards.
First communion: the theology is that the parents present the child for this sacrament, ideally in the context of the Sunday liturgy, but at another time and place if that is pastorally necessary. The teachers do not present a class, the parents present their children. That assumes the parents have some participatory understanding of the Mass and the meaning of the Eucharist. If your parish did not offer parent meetings to help you grow in this knowledge, or if your own catechesis was lacking when you grew up, please remedy any deficiencies.
If you cannot receive the sacraments at this particular time due to circumstances in your life please consult your pastor (not the catechist, DRE, your sister, your neighbor) about how to go about rectifying the situation. marriage circumstances particularly may be much easier to resolve than you think. It is a shame to see the child go to communion, but the rest of the family stay in the pew. On the other hand, make sure non-Catholic guests know the rules for receiving communion (printed in most missalettes).
make sure MIL knows rules about photos in church, she may still break them, but the sin won’t be on your head. see rules for videos above. I never saw my kids make their first communions, all I saw was the army of relatives crowding the aisle, impeding the children from processing, taking pix. this is a sacrament, not a photo op. Also, it is not a prom, and the children should dress appropriate for their age. this is not a beauty pageant for pre-adolescents.
a Catholic Church should always welcome babies and children of all ages, but the members of the wedding party at least should not have to assume child care duties in the middle of the ceremony. Please bring aunt or grandma along to take the kid to the potty, our outside if they become disruptive.
just some observations which I hope will make your day more special, and keep Jesus as the focus.
Weddings: please use the period of preparation to find out what is required (or what is forbidden) as far as dress, witnesses, photos and videos, songs, music, readings and other aspects of the ceremony. This is a sacrament celebrated inside or outside Mass, with a liturgy and a ritual that pertains, There is no room for do-it-yourself.
Girls, please LOOK in a MIRROR when trying on wedding garb, especially a 3-way mirror, wearing the proper foundation garments for the style you have chosen. Be very, very honest and critical of your appearance. This is a wedding, not a prom, not a disco, and not Vegas.
If your photographer/videographer does not have equipment that allows him/her to use a zoom lens and fewer lights than required by night baseball, get another photographer. The purpose of this production is to get married, not produce a documentary for the Cannes film festival. The priest and the bride and groom are the players here, we don’t want to watch the back of the photographer at work. better suggestion: find a parish where photos and videos are forbidden during Mass and take posed pix afterwards.
First communion: the theology is that the parents present the child for this sacrament, ideally in the context of the Sunday liturgy, but at another time and place if that is pastorally necessary. The teachers do not present a class, the parents present their children. That assumes the parents have some participatory understanding of the Mass and the meaning of the Eucharist. If your parish did not offer parent meetings to help you grow in this knowledge, or if your own catechesis was lacking when you grew up, please remedy any deficiencies.
If you cannot receive the sacraments at this particular time due to circumstances in your life please consult your pastor (not the catechist, DRE, your sister, your neighbor) about how to go about rectifying the situation. marriage circumstances particularly may be much easier to resolve than you think. It is a shame to see the child go to communion, but the rest of the family stay in the pew. On the other hand, make sure non-Catholic guests know the rules for receiving communion (printed in most missalettes).
make sure MIL knows rules about photos in church, she may still break them, but the sin won’t be on your head. see rules for videos above. I never saw my kids make their first communions, all I saw was the army of relatives crowding the aisle, impeding the children from processing, taking pix. this is a sacrament, not a photo op. Also, it is not a prom, and the children should dress appropriate for their age. this is not a beauty pageant for pre-adolescents.
a Catholic Church should always welcome babies and children of all ages, but the members of the wedding party at least should not have to assume child care duties in the middle of the ceremony. Please bring aunt or grandma along to take the kid to the potty, our outside if they become disruptive.
just some observations which I hope will make your day more special, and keep Jesus as the focus.
I totaly second that! 