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netmilsmom
Guest
LOLOL!!
My kids need all the blessings they can get!
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My kids need all the blessings they can get!
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Panis_Angelicas
Guest
A layperson can give a blessing, but should not be doing so during the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, while performing a specified duty as a commissioned Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion.
The volunteer is commissioned by the bishop for the purpose of distributing Holy Communion. Blessings during the Mass should be performed by the priest and in accordance with the rubrics and norms of the Liturgical Rite.
Redemptionis Sacramentumwarns against a certain âclericalizationâ of the laity, and in his ad limina address to the bishops of the Antilles in May 2002, the Holy Father emphasized the problem of âclericalizationâ of the laity:
"The involvement of the laity becomes a form of clericalism when the sacramental or liturgical roles that belong to the priest are taken over by lay faithful or when the laity start to perform tasks of pastoral governance proper to the priest."
Requesting a layman to bestow a blessing during Mass instead of performing the duty he or she has been assigned to perform, may well be asking that person to extend his ministry beyond its bounds.
Combine that with the bishopsâ concern that the Mass not be unduly prolonged. Having everyone in the Church approach the altar at Communion time, even if they are not going to receive Communion, but want a blessing instead, is unduly prolonging this portion of the Mass.
After a brief period of thanksgiving, the priest blesses the entire assembly. There is no reason to approach the Blessed Sacrament, refuse the Sacrament, and request a personal blessing instead. This is a time of âcommunity,â when receiving the Host makes us all one. We receive not only for ourselves, but for the entire Church, including those too young or infirm, etc. to receive.
I do have little children, three aged six and under, and I do leave them in the pew. I briefly tried the âblessingâ thing, but realized that it was not fostering in the children a desire to one day receive the Host. It was an exciting time for them to get up out of their seats, but to them, a blessing was âas good asâ Holy Communion! In fact, it seemed to foster a disregard for the Sacred Host.
I would rather have them wait, watch others receive, and develop the desire and longing to receive Our Lord in Holy Communion. When I return to my pew, with the Sacred Host still in my mouth, I will give each of my children a little kiss on the cheek or forehead, offering them a âkiss from Jesus,â who they now know, Is in my mouth. Then, we quiety pray some prayers of thanksgiving.
Some things in life are âworth the wait.â This is a most valuable lesson for them. One day, they will be able to go up there and receive Jesus!
Now, if I could just come up with a way to get them to sit still and quietly in the pew while Iâm in the Communion lineâŚ!
The volunteer is commissioned by the bishop for the purpose of distributing Holy Communion. Blessings during the Mass should be performed by the priest and in accordance with the rubrics and norms of the Liturgical Rite.
Redemptionis Sacramentumwarns against a certain âclericalizationâ of the laity, and in his ad limina address to the bishops of the Antilles in May 2002, the Holy Father emphasized the problem of âclericalizationâ of the laity:
"The involvement of the laity becomes a form of clericalism when the sacramental or liturgical roles that belong to the priest are taken over by lay faithful or when the laity start to perform tasks of pastoral governance proper to the priest."
Requesting a layman to bestow a blessing during Mass instead of performing the duty he or she has been assigned to perform, may well be asking that person to extend his ministry beyond its bounds.
Combine that with the bishopsâ concern that the Mass not be unduly prolonged. Having everyone in the Church approach the altar at Communion time, even if they are not going to receive Communion, but want a blessing instead, is unduly prolonging this portion of the Mass.
After a brief period of thanksgiving, the priest blesses the entire assembly. There is no reason to approach the Blessed Sacrament, refuse the Sacrament, and request a personal blessing instead. This is a time of âcommunity,â when receiving the Host makes us all one. We receive not only for ourselves, but for the entire Church, including those too young or infirm, etc. to receive.
I do have little children, three aged six and under, and I do leave them in the pew. I briefly tried the âblessingâ thing, but realized that it was not fostering in the children a desire to one day receive the Host. It was an exciting time for them to get up out of their seats, but to them, a blessing was âas good asâ Holy Communion! In fact, it seemed to foster a disregard for the Sacred Host.
I would rather have them wait, watch others receive, and develop the desire and longing to receive Our Lord in Holy Communion. When I return to my pew, with the Sacred Host still in my mouth, I will give each of my children a little kiss on the cheek or forehead, offering them a âkiss from Jesus,â who they now know, Is in my mouth. Then, we quiety pray some prayers of thanksgiving.
Some things in life are âworth the wait.â This is a most valuable lesson for them. One day, they will be able to go up there and receive Jesus!
Now, if I could just come up with a way to get them to sit still and quietly in the pew while Iâm in the Communion lineâŚ!
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MooCowSteph
Guest
Panis Angelicas:
Panis Angelicas:
Panis Angelicas:
Panis Angelicas:
It may be, but I do not think youâve provided sufficent proof. They are still performing their duties, and I donât see it as a distraction. Just my :twocents:
Panis Angelicas:
It takes very little time to say âGod bless youâ. I do not think this is prolonging the Mass by more than 2 to 3 minutes, even if nearly every child who was under age came forward, which they do not.
Panis Angelicas:
They are not refusing; they are not allowed, as those receiving a blessing are doing so because they have not received the sacrament of First Holy Communion.
Panis Angelicas:
I agree that this may be the way to do it for some families. Iâm not advocating that we force children into the communion line, just that we not force them out.
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Catholic90
Guest
My kids always went up for a blessing when they were too little to receive, and all three of them couldnât wait to actually receive Jesus. That certainly didnât stunt their desire!! They still had to wait to receive, and they were very excited to do so.
Some kids are too little to leave behind (especially in larger churches, such as ours is). The kids get scared, miss mommy, cause trouble, make noise, etc, so it is much better to carry, bring, walk, etc the child up with them. Our priests (we have 2) have instructed all EMâs that whomever asks for a blessing is to receive one. As far as prolonging communion, it runs pretty smoothly. We have a very large parish, as I mentioned, so we have 5 âstationsâ set up with 17 people distributing (includes 2 priests and deacons, plus EMâs).
It works for us!
Some kids are too little to leave behind (especially in larger churches, such as ours is). The kids get scared, miss mommy, cause trouble, make noise, etc, so it is much better to carry, bring, walk, etc the child up with them. Our priests (we have 2) have instructed all EMâs that whomever asks for a blessing is to receive one. As far as prolonging communion, it runs pretty smoothly. We have a very large parish, as I mentioned, so we have 5 âstationsâ set up with 17 people distributing (includes 2 priests and deacons, plus EMâs).
It works for us!
D
De_Maria
Guest
Br. Rich SFO:
Everything done in the Mass must be in the âSpirit of the Scripturesâ which tell us that we love God with our heart, mind body and soul. It is right and meet that we teach children at the earliest age to desire communion with Our Lord.
Why donât we leave children alone in the pews? Because they are accustomed to being with their parents and they feel abandoned and confused when left alone. Many children in this type of distress will cry and become disruptive. Disruption of the Mass is something that should be minimized when possible. Nor should parents be made to feel that they must not attend mass unless they can find a baby sitter for their children at home.
The Church is the house of God. We are Godâs children. The very same people who donât make the children feel welcome in their Fatherâs house, are the ones who complain that the younger generation doesnât want to attend Mass and is falling away from the Church.
Sincerely,
De Maria
The GIRM, as authoritative as it is, does not refute the Word of God. Jesus said, âLet the children come to me and do not prevent themâ. Therefore, the children may approach the priest or the eucharist to receive a blessing whether they recieve communion or not.
Everything done in the Mass must be in the âSpirit of the Scripturesâ which tell us that we love God with our heart, mind body and soul. It is right and meet that we teach children at the earliest age to desire communion with Our Lord.
Why donât we leave children alone in the pews? Because they are accustomed to being with their parents and they feel abandoned and confused when left alone. Many children in this type of distress will cry and become disruptive. Disruption of the Mass is something that should be minimized when possible. Nor should parents be made to feel that they must not attend mass unless they can find a baby sitter for their children at home.
The Church is the house of God. We are Godâs children. The very same people who donât make the children feel welcome in their Fatherâs house, are the ones who complain that the younger generation doesnât want to attend Mass and is falling away from the Church.
Sincerely,
De Maria
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travellinmike
Guest
No you did nothing wrong. This is a topic that Iâm currently struggling with. WEâve just returned to Church during Lent and when we go up for Communion, my wife carries our 2 yr old ('cause sheâs too little to stay behind) and I tell my son (almost 6) to âKneel or sit still and weâll be back soon, Youâre not old enough yetâ half way up the aisle i feel him behind me. âmommy letâs me come up with herâ
As for having to âclimb overâ children who do not go up for Communion, Why are those under 7 the only ones staying in the pews. The Confessionals must be packed on Saturday afternoon.
I know iâm not supposed to notice whatâs going on around me but being newly back after 20 yrs away Iâm trying to get a feel for the state of the Parish. Everybody goes up for Communion, but very few people genuflect any more. Even at the front of the alter. I donât see many people blessing themselves with Holywater coming and going from the church. The Priest reads the bulliten to us after Communion, the alter boys (and girls grrrr
) are wearing sneakers. They have a perfectly good organ in the chior loft but continue to plink away at this little upright piano they have up front. The little bells arenât rung after âDo this in memory of meâ, and on and on and on.
I think there are more troubling lapses to be concerned about than squeezing past a pair of little legs.
I will always make my way over to the priests line for Communion, And he does shift around from week to week so itâs a little guessing game to try to pick the side heâs going to be distributing from.
Mike
As for having to âclimb overâ children who do not go up for Communion, Why are those under 7 the only ones staying in the pews. The Confessionals must be packed on Saturday afternoon.
I know iâm not supposed to notice whatâs going on around me but being newly back after 20 yrs away Iâm trying to get a feel for the state of the Parish. Everybody goes up for Communion, but very few people genuflect any more. Even at the front of the alter. I donât see many people blessing themselves with Holywater coming and going from the church. The Priest reads the bulliten to us after Communion, the alter boys (and girls grrrr
) are wearing sneakers. They have a perfectly good organ in the chior loft but continue to plink away at this little upright piano they have up front. The little bells arenât rung after âDo this in memory of meâ, and on and on and on.I think there are more troubling lapses to be concerned about than squeezing past a pair of little legs.
I will always make my way over to the priests line for Communion, And he does shift around from week to week so itâs a little guessing game to try to pick the side heâs going to be distributing from.
Mike
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carol_marie
Guest
Well said Mike.
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travellinmike
Guest
De Maria:
De Maria:
Yes itâs a struggle to remain calm at times when the âhairy eyeballâ is on you but itâs only for another year or so. And itâs not every week, most times sheâs a little angel. Better for me or my wife to not get to pay 100% attention at mass than for her to be home with a baby sitter getting 0% of the mass.
Mike
I donât think we are talking about infants/toddlers who will cry. A 4-6 yr old should be able to sit quietly for 3-5 minutes without feeling abandoned. If not the parents havenât explained what is going very well to them.
De Maria:
Most churches have a crying room though I find that more disruptive than just carrying my daughter to the vestibule and rocking with her head on my shoulder for 5-10 min until she calms down. I then walk quietly back to my pew and rejoin the family. If she persists in rude behavior (squirming, screaming, growling, hitting) I will just put her down and let her run around the vestibule. Lots to explore and I can listen at the door. Itâs not like Iâm alone either thereâs lots of company sitting on folding chairs in the back. The folks who show up halfway through the Homily.
Yes itâs a struggle to remain calm at times when the âhairy eyeballâ is on you but itâs only for another year or so. And itâs not every week, most times sheâs a little angel. Better for me or my wife to not get to pay 100% attention at mass than for her to be home with a baby sitter getting 0% of the mass.
Mike
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carol_marie
Guest
Just wanted to add something that I think is interesting⌠thereâs another thread going about what to do with your purse when you go up for Communion. Some said leave it in the pew but MOST said thatâs not a good idea because there have been purses stolen and it didnât matter if it was in a âbad neighborhoodâ or a quiet suburb. If a thief sees an oportunity heâll take it. So let me get this straight⌠purse, bring with me⌠small children, leave behind???
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maryalene
Guest
Br. Rich SFO:
Our previous priest did the blessings, but our current priest does not. In one of his first homilies, he explained it as you have. He said children too young to receive the Eucharist but old enough to remain in the pew alone should not come forward. He stated that this would help impart on them that the Eucharist is something sacred that can only be received after proper preparation.
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puzzleannie
Guest
carol marie:
your best route is to enroll your children in CCD for sacramental preparation so they learn why the Eucharist is worth waiting for, and experience the same love and longing that led to your own journey home to the Church.
you were not wrong, the person who gave you this advice was misinformed. there is nothing in the rubrics of the Mass which allows for a blessing on those who approach the priest but cannot receive communion for whatever reason. In any case, a lay person cannot give a blessing, only the priest or deacon. there may be some parishes where the priests do have this practice, but anyplace else the ministers are not going to know what is going on, because it is outside of their training and experience.
your best route is to enroll your children in CCD for sacramental preparation so they learn why the Eucharist is worth waiting for, and experience the same love and longing that led to your own journey home to the Church.
O
OhioBob
Guest
Panis Angelicas:
I agree. Iâve never understood why people approach the Blessed Sacrament and then refuse it. If you are not receiving Communion for whatever reason, you should stay in your pew. Some people seem to feel like they have to âparticipateâ in everything in order to get their moneyâs worth at Mass.
O
OhioBob
Guest
carol marie:
Can an EMHC bless a purse?
A
Affirmed
Guest
The GIRM says nothing about preventing children form following their parents in the communion line. But still there will be those who say they should stay. Itâs really up to your own judgement in these sort of things I think. And the point was also made about shifting around to recieve from the priest. If Holy Mother Church has allowed for the reception of Holy Communion from an EMHC, what makes you think you know better? I donât particularly like having them either, but unless more young men start enterring the seminary, we have to deal with them. They are performing their duty as they believe they have been called, and I donât understand why some people think that by passing up Christ in the hand of a layperson they are somehow doing him a favor. I donât get it.
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carol_marie
Guest
OhioBob, what a stinker you are! You make me laugh!!!Can an EMHC bless a purse?
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rcn
Guest
Oh, come on now, we all know this is the custom now in most parishes. Even if it is ill-founded.
I suppose whether one would feel comfortable leaving the kids in the pew would depend on the size and layout of the church, among other things. As I recall, there were times where Mom would go to receive and Dad would stay in the seat with the little ones till she returned, and then heâd go up. But 6 to 13 year olds should certainly be able to stay put.
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RichT
Guest
Our Bishop has recently directed us to simply offer the following prayer to those who are not receiving, âMay God give you the fullness of life.â We are not to give a blessing. We are not to touch the person, or make any hand gestures either. Prior to that we were directed to only say a simple âGod bless youâ to young children. If an adult or teen came through the line, we were to direct them to a priest or deacon for a blessing. We all receive a blessing at the concluding rite before we leave, assuming you stay for the blessing!
As has been said, all parishes are a little different. You need to do what feels right with the children. If it means sitting in the section that receives from a priest or deacon, then do so, otherwise just ask the childrenn to follow you and not expect a blessing.
As has been said, all parishes are a little different. You need to do what feels right with the children. If it means sitting in the section that receives from a priest or deacon, then do so, otherwise just ask the childrenn to follow you and not expect a blessing.
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De_Maria
Guest
My wife and I homeschool our children and attend daily mass. My children have essentially grown up (our oldest is 18, our youngest 6) in the pews. We have found that our children know how to behave in Church because they feel welcome there. Everyone knows them, the priests, deacons, seminarians, nuns. They have seen them grow up because they are there everyday. Its not a matter of whether we will go to church but what time will we be there.
We (my wife and I) thank God that our Pastors have always, everyday, allowed our children to come up for a blessing in imitation of the adults who come for communion. They have always hungered for the time when they will join the rest of us in receiving communion. Just this morning, at mass, my youngest who will begin CCE next year asked me, âwhy canât I receive communion?â I am very happy that the Lord has always led and guided us in the upbringing of our children.
I feel sorry for those parents who feel harrassed by people who want to make the Mass in their own image forgetting that the most precious thing in this world is the condition of their little souls. Therefore Jesus said, âIf anyone leads one of these little ones astray, it is better for them if they have a stone tied around their neck and be flung into the ocean.â
Sincerely,
De Maria
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TableServant
Guest
I would agree with those who say that you did nothing wrong in having your children come forward for a blessing. In my experience, the blessing of individuals who, for whatever reason, cannot receive Holy Communion, has become such a wide-spread practice, that I do expect the parish Extraordinary Ministers to have some understanding of what is happening when someone comes forward in this manner. If they donât, I believe that the pastoral leadership of the parish - the pastor, should take the time to determine what diocesan norms are, and if there arenât any, institute parish norms and give instruction.
Even if, in this particular parish, the practice is for no one to come forward who is not receiving, so then, no one comes forward with arms crossed for a blessing, there may be visitors from other parishes and other dioceses where the practice is the norm, and the Extraordinary Ministers of Communion should have some understanding of how to handle the situation.
I would say, also, that a lay person can certainly give a blessing, using appropriate wording, if they have been called forward as an Extraordinary Minister of Communion. I would say that they should not, however, give a blessing with the Holy Eucharist as I have seen done in some parishes (for example, look at Benediction & Reposition).
I would question the âapproaching and refusingâ aspect of this, though. If someone has not received First Holy Eucharist, then they are not refusing, they cannot receive, and are acknowledging that fact in the manner in which they have been instructed to acknowledge it (unless they came up with this on their own, which I doubt).
On the other hand, if someone is a practicing Catholic, who has not met with their priest/confessor about their sins, but has decided, on their own, to refuse to receive Holy Eucharist, (unless they are imminently conscious of grave/mortal sin - they just committed it and have had no chance at all to speak with a priest, or just realized that they have been committing some sin), then I believe that they are in error. Again, this is someone who has had the opportunity to speak with a priest, but has not availed themselves of the opportunity, and has decided on their own not to receive. The Lord does not ask us to come only when it is convenient, or only when we think we are worthy - else we would (should) never approach.
Trust in Him. If this person thought enough about it to decide not to receive, then they should have thought enough about it to come to Sacramental Reconciliation.
<Slightly more than $.02.>
Even if, in this particular parish, the practice is for no one to come forward who is not receiving, so then, no one comes forward with arms crossed for a blessing, there may be visitors from other parishes and other dioceses where the practice is the norm, and the Extraordinary Ministers of Communion should have some understanding of how to handle the situation.
I would say, also, that a lay person can certainly give a blessing, using appropriate wording, if they have been called forward as an Extraordinary Minister of Communion. I would say that they should not, however, give a blessing with the Holy Eucharist as I have seen done in some parishes (for example, look at Benediction & Reposition).
I would question the âapproaching and refusingâ aspect of this, though. If someone has not received First Holy Eucharist, then they are not refusing, they cannot receive, and are acknowledging that fact in the manner in which they have been instructed to acknowledge it (unless they came up with this on their own, which I doubt).
On the other hand, if someone is a practicing Catholic, who has not met with their priest/confessor about their sins, but has decided, on their own, to refuse to receive Holy Eucharist, (unless they are imminently conscious of grave/mortal sin - they just committed it and have had no chance at all to speak with a priest, or just realized that they have been committing some sin), then I believe that they are in error. Again, this is someone who has had the opportunity to speak with a priest, but has not availed themselves of the opportunity, and has decided on their own not to receive. The Lord does not ask us to come only when it is convenient, or only when we think we are worthy - else we would (should) never approach.
Trust in Him. If this person thought enough about it to decide not to receive, then they should have thought enough about it to come to Sacramental Reconciliation.
<Slightly more than $.02.>
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De_Maria
Guest
Please provide the reference for this statement. If you were correct, then lay people couldnât end their messages with the words, God Bless you. Nor could anyone say that to those who sneeze.
So please provide the Church document that forbids us laypeople from bestowing blessings on anyone. Because laypeople give blessings all the time.
I would venture to say that only those Catholics who do not take their calling seriously of a Royal Priesthood, a holy nation
would not bestow their blessings upon anyone.
Sincerely,
De Maria
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