First off, the Eucharist was never all that “simple.” And the only reason it was being held in private places was that there were no public places. As soon as people had public places, that’s where they were held.
If you want to experience the closest thing to an early Church agape meal (closest without there being a Sacrament involved, anyway), go to a synagogue service and to the meal that is often held right afterward. The synagogue service is formal, and the “agape meal” (so to speak) is still pretty formal too. (Albeit the breaking out into hymns between the courses is pretty fun as well as formal.) Synagogues were public places. The Temple was a public place.
Family worship could be important and intimate at the same time, like the Jewish sabbath meal at home on Friday night, or like the early Christian custom of having the whole household sing psalms antiphonally at lamplighting time when it was getting dark.
But the Eucharist, the todah Thanksgiving offering, was always a public and formal thing.
Anything we do that is serious, tends to become more solemn and formal. Solemnity and formality allow one to be oneself within a public event, whereas an informal public event is a matter of elaborately pretending to be at ease with everyone and everything. (Like a politician.)
The very word “liturgy” (leitourgia) represents Mass as a public work (usually something like a bridge or a festival) instituted and conducted by some rich man (Christ, in this case) for our benefit.
Now, that said, the ancient way of thinking about things was that everybody in a neighborhood or city was a fellow citizen to you, and you all knew a lot about each other’s business. If parishes spent more time together outside of Mass, Mass would seem much more “familial,” and the formality would feel friendly. I have been to very solemn and reserved Masses where the whole congregation is focused on God, and felt very comfortable there even as a stranger, because they all knew how to work together on praying. All I had to do was follow their lead. But many parishes aren’t like that, and that’s why people feel uncomfortable there.
We can’t cram a lifetime worth of friendliness into Mass, nor should we try. That’s not what it’s for. Mass is for getting to know God better.
YES!