R
Randy_Carson
Guest
I spent five years considering the monastic life, so I understand the negativity from folks who don’t understand it - especially the contemplative orders.Once I started talking about the idea I might have a religious calling to the monastic life, about a year and a half ago, I have mostly met with negative or neutral responses.
Usually these responses go along the lines of:
you could do more to help people, or perhaps you could be a deacon instead, or, hmph, you should talk to my Jesuit friends, or are you sure that’s the best way to serve the Church? (a deacon’s wife literally just made a grunt sound and turned away from me. It was at a party and I hadn’t met her, perhaps it was a mere coincidence and she didn’t mean it towards me, as I wasn’t talking exactly to her but was being introduced to her and her husband by another)
The only person that ever really encouraged me was a former Buddhist nun.
I am going to start talking with my local priest about religious discernment. We had a preliminary talk today just for a few minutes. Though I think his heart is in the right place, I’m worried by some of his language that he will be more interested in persuading me to follow the priesthood. It’s not something I’m vehemently opposed to… but how do I stick up for the monastic way, without being too unbalanced in one direction or another?
Does anyone have advice for me? Does anyone ever feel the same way? I meet with opposition or redirection at just about every turn. But I don’t think that’s God telling me to avoid the path of the monk-- the circumstances under which I met the ex-nun are far more compelling, and her encouragement towards the monastery seems like it would be more an act of God’s intervention than the mundane circumstances I meet opposition in.
I’m just feeling discouraged and could use some help
- Pray.
- Read good books.
- Go on retreats at different monasteries to discern which order/house you belong to.
- Touch base with the vocation director in your diocese…he may be willing to meet with you from time to time or regularly.
- Do not try to be a monk now - though regular mass and daily prayer are important for all of us…not just candidates. The Trappists told me not to try to live their life on my own…better that you should enter the monastery having lived fully (without sin, of course) so that you are clear on what you are giving up to be a monk. They want men who are mentally, emotionally and physically sound. “Escapism” has no place in religious life.