excommunicated

[ognipix]

Am I in the wrong place here? I desperately want to return to my faith, but, I fear from reading here that there is no hope for me. I married in the church at age 18. I kenew it was wrong. Its a very long story. I married him because of a date forcible act and felt I could never marry anyone else. I am in my 60’s. I divorced him after 18 years. I then married outside the church several years later. So, can I never return to my Catholic faith? Am I condemned to hell for all eternity?

 

[BrendanD]

You are welcome to come home to the Church! There are some things you will have to take care of, like getting an annulment for your previous marriage and going to confession. You should see a priest and he can help you figure out what you need to do.

 

[mommyof4]

Am I in the wrong place here? I desperately want to return to my faith, but, I fear from reading here that there is no hope for me. I married in the church at age 18. I kenew it was wrong. It[s a very long story. I married him because of a date forcible act and felt I could never marry anyone else. I am in my 60’s. I divorced him after 18 years. I then married outside the church several years later. So, can I never return to my Catholic faith? Am I condemned to hell for all eternity?

No, no one is beyond hope. Please go see a priest as soon as possible, and let him help you sort everything out. Praying for you, by the way!
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[lizaanne]

You need to speak with your priest, and have your marriage reviewed by the Marriage Tribunal. Your first marriage may be invalid, but only the Tribunal can determine this.

Don’t stay away! We want you with us!

In the mean time - you may still attend Mass, but you may NOT receive Holy Communion. You are still considered married to your first husband until the Tribunal determines otherwise, and so you would be required to live in a chaste state within your current situation.

Please - see a priest about this - it may not be as difficult as you think to come back to the Sacraments.

~Liza

 

[puzzleannie]

Am I in the wrong place here? I desperately want to return to my faith, but, I fear from reading here that there is no hope for me. I married in the church at age 18. I kenew it was wrong. It[s a very long story. I married him because of a date forcible act and felt I could never marry anyone else. I am in my 60’s. I divorced him after 18 years. I then married outside the church several years later. So, can I never return to my Catholic faith? Am I condemned to hell for all eternity?

you cannot be excommunicated unless you commit a wilful act, freely and with full consent, knowing fully that this act will excommunicate you. Abortion would be one example. No one can be condemned to hell unless they chose it, and unless they refuse to repent and ask forgiveness.

You need only make a good confession of all sins of your past life and return to the sacraments. Tell the priest all the circumstances of your story and let him guide you. He can help you regularize your marriage situation in good order, and guide you on how to comport yourself in the meantime.

Welcome home.
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[ognipix]

Thank you all for your replies. My eyes are tearing. I have been reciting the rosary for several months now. With EWTN I was drawn to this site. I will see a priest as soon as I can arrange it. God Bless you for answering my post.

 

[mschrank]

Hi Ogin,

No you’re not automatically excommunicated for divorce. That is wrong if someone told you that.

Secondly, if you were forced to marry the first guy, then it was probably never even a valid marriage. That means that you can possibly have it nullified, then you will be free to have your current marriage validated by the Church.

God bless,

Matthew

 

[lizaanne]

That means that you can possibly have it nullified, …

Just a fine point I wish to clarify so there is no misunderstanding for our OP or anyone else who may read this.

The Church can not, and never does, nullify anything. The Marriage Tribunal will determine if a marriage was ever valid from the beginning and will make that judgment based on the facts they are presented. They can not make something null that was once valid. They only examine the marriage and make a declaration of the validity. That is why it is properly called a Declaration of Nullity - NOT an annulment, which is a common misuse of the word.

Hope that helps.

~Liza

 

[Seatuck]

Am I in the wrong place here? I desperately want to return to my faith, but, I fear from reading here that there is no hope for me. I married in the church at age 18. I kenew it was wrong. It[s a very long story. I married him because of a date forcible act and felt I could never marry anyone else. I am in my 60’s. I divorced him after 18 years. I then married outside the church several years later. So, can I never return to my Catholic faith? Am I condemned to hell for all eternity?

There’s always hope. Please see a Priest asap to take steps to come back in union with the church.You certainly can start attending Mass if you don’t do so .Your priest will advise you on your relationship with your current husband. You will need to go to confession and should probably consider proceedings through the marriage tribunal. It all starts with an appointment with the Priest.

You have my prayers. Surely the Holy Spirit is working within you and will strengthen you .
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[montanaman]

Thank you all for your replies. My eyes are tearing. I have been reciting the rosary for several months now. With EWTN I was drawn to this site. I will see a priest as soon as I can arrange it. God Bless you for answering my post.

I noticed that your location is “Virginia.” If you’re near Northern Virginia, Alexandria specifically, then I can recommend an excellent parish with not one, but FOUR solid priests. By that I mean they’re the real deal and compassionate. There’s also lots of Catholic “stuff” going on. It’s St. Mary’s in Old Town, Alexandria. If you want to come back to the Faith, I can’t recommend a better spiritual home. It’s where I came back, where I got married, and where I’ll soon be baptizing our first child.

Welcome back. Be not afraid!

 

[jwashu]

The only thing that condems us would be refusal to accept God’s forgivness.

As others have said, you need to go to confession and schedule some time to talk with a Priest at a local Parish but you are still Catholic and we all Praise and thank Him for your return.

Welcome Home!

Joe

 

[teme]

Definitely meet with a priest!

In the mean time - you may still attend Mass, but you may NOT receive Holy Communion. You are still considered married to your first husband until the Tribunal determines otherwise, and so you would be required to live in a chaste state within your current situation.

She may receive Holy Communion if she no longer engages in sexual relations with her second, invalid husband, and receives forgiveness through Reconciliation. The divorce is not the sin here, it’s the marital relations to a second man, other than her first husband. So, if she confesses the previous sin, and doesn’t engage further in sexual relations until her first marriage is declared null (if that is the case), she’s free to receive the Eucharist. Only she, God, and her Confessor can say whether she may or may not receive our Lord.

 

[rpp]

Definitely meet with a priest!

She may receive Holy Communion if she no longer engages in sexual relations with her second, invalid husband, and receives forgiveness through Reconciliation. The divorce is not the sin here, it’s the marital relations to a second man, other than her first husband. So, if she confesses the previous sin, and doesn’t engage further in sexual relations until her first marriage is declared null (if that is the case), she’s free to receive the Eucharist. Only she, God, and her Confessor can say whether she may or may not receive our Lord.

Rather than worry about leaglisms at this stage, let’s focus on welcoming Ogin back! She will, with the help of a good priest, be able to address the things that relate to her specific situation.

Oginipix, may God bless you and bring you peace. May He grant your journey back to the Church a short and spirit-fulled one. There is nothing insurmountable in what you have posted. Nothing even particularly bad. Welcome home!

 

[robert_ambrose]

get the bible and look for the return of the prodigal son , put yourself in his shoes and fall into the arms of the crying father who waited and waited and waited for the return of his child. welcome back