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Hoosier_Daddy
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You have a seriously flawed view.
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ArielRussu
Guest
No, my entire extended family (aunts, grandparents, uncles, cousins), not just my parents, have told my sister and I that, since I can remember. After all, being a parent is wonderful but you need to be responsible and seriously think before you have kids, especially when you carry a terrible genetic disease. Plus, this relates as I also came across a mother with a son with my condition who has been through Hell and back after his intestines exploded inside of him after he went septic following a surgery and she wrote she has no problem having more kids with Hirschsprung’s and putting more children through the hell her sons been through and will go through simply so she could grow from the “experience”. For her take on it is seeing her son suffer and caring for him has made her a better person, thus, if she had more like him she’d experience more personal growth.
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Hoosier_Daddy
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Since you have multiple issues in this area I would suggest you start a new thread where you can explore your issues in depth. This thread however, should contain clear authentic and holy teaching.
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Convert_in_99
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She may just find that the joy of having another child brought into this world far outweighs the possible risk of having another child with birth defects. The joy of that child’s existence, birth defects and all, is a far greater good than that child never existing.
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ArielRussu
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Unfortunately, I would not be surprised if that child ends up with some kind of mental health issue, like PTSD when he’s older though and as someone who got PTSD going through being subjected to some of what he has, in my opinion at least, I’d choose to never been born rather than live through those “treatments” and end up being mentally tormented for the rest of my life. So, as someone with that condition and 1st hand experience, Not second hand like his mother, there is no joy in existence, especially when you end up with a mental health issue at your parents expense of having a child.She may just find that the joy of having another child brought into this world far outweighs the possible risk of having another child with birth defects. The joy of that child’s existence, birth defects and all, is a far greater good than that child never existing.
To give you an idea, his mother does rectal dilations and enemas twice a day and has for years! And says if he so much sees the items he freaks out and has a huge breakdown!
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csuther
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Of course I would feel horrible and guilty. Do you not think I feel it every time my child is sitting in the hem/onc ward? Every time they are sick? I did this to them. I am perfectly healthy while they suffer. That is a far stretch from eugenics. I would love another child regardless. I just didn’t want to put another through what my other children go through. And I believe I said that I was happy for other parents, and admire their strength. I myself just couldn’t take the risk. Fanconi Anemia is a cruel, horrible disease. And just because we’ve made the best of it doesn’t mean that I don’t wish like heck that they didn’t have it.
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Convert_in_99
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Getting your uterus and ovaries removed is no cake-walk dear. Just read through my many many recent posts of the serious physical and mental repercussions of such a surgery.
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1ke
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I think sharing your experience is terrific. You didn’t derail anything. These things happen all the time. I just realized that Aussie wasn’t posting anymore and the thread had gotten off topic.
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ArielRussu
Guest
Why? In sterilization (ex. Bilateral salopingectomy) you are not killing another living human being, you are just removing tissue, yes it maybe alive but so is a malignant tumor which can create its own blood supply separate from the body. After all, you are, at least in my case, removing an organ that contains the potential of passing onto a child a terrible genetic disease and suffering that innocent baby doesn’t deserve. Thus, it in a way it is diseased, because, in this case, the Fallopian tubes are what facilitate the passage of eggs that contain a high amount of mutated genes for a particular condition. So, by removing them, you are thus eliminating a potential problem. Same with the ovaries which produce the mutated eggs.
At least for me, when an issue or problem is bothering me, I deal with it as quickly and efficiently as possible, and in this case, it would be to eliminate the causative problem so I can go on with my life, as it makes zero sense, logically to me, to keep an organ there simply because I was born with it and be tormented by anxiety over a potential pregnancy ever month because I miscalculated using NFP.
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jmjZelie
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I thought you said you would rather leave cancer untreated than to allow medical professionals anywhere near you. And now you are making a tubal ligation sound like it is no big deal, and you sound very breezy about the idea of choosing that for yourself.
Compare your statements from this page of your thread:
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=1012219&page=6
So which is it? “Never a pelvic exam or any women’s health treatments” or “cut the reproductive organs out and throw them away”? Because you cannot have the latter if you won’t submit to the former.
Either your thoughts on these issues are totally erratic, or you are exaggerating on one side or the other, simply to make your point.
None of this bodes well for being able to handle the intimacies and physical realities of marriage, let alone the emotional and psychological realities of sharing your life with another person.
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ArielRussu
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I was using an example people on this forum would most be familiar with. What I am actually planning on doing, at some point, is use Western gromwell (stone seed). It is a natural sterility plant used by the Shoshone women to cause permanent sterility. If you drink a tea made from its roots for 6 months it causes permanent sterility.
That doesn’t sound like it would be particularly good for your body in general. Drinking toxic substances to cause sterility is not the smartest idea I’ve come across on these forums.
Also…I love how people have acknowledged that the thread has gone completely off topic to the point that it’s no longer even relevant to the OP’s original question…and yet then continue with the off-topic debate.
The OP wants to have children safely, not avoid it completely. Epilepsy is completely different to the myriad other conditions being discussed at this point.
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jmjZelie
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Sorry to continue the derailing. I guess I was just so taken aback by Ariel’s strong stance about sterilization.
I have no advice for Aussie, because I know nothing about epilepsy. But I do know that NFP is definitely licit for a couple to prudently plan the safest time for a pregnancy. I think Hoosier Daddy gave some great advice earlier, addressing how a couple might deal with the realities of such careful planning, practically speaking.
All due respect, but I don’t think Ariel is going to care too much about church teaching (or common sense for that matter) if she’s planning to poison herself sterile.
As for epilepsy, I’ve had a bit too much experience with that. I will say that it’s entirely within the realm of possibility that a woman with epilepsy to safely have children, there are risks, but people do it all the time.
As I said before, epilepsy is one of the areas where there is always ongoing research into new technologies and medications. I would be very hopeful that Aussie can work out a plan with her doctor to manage seizures during any pregnancies.
And sometimes epilepsy can be completely cured, or at least made significantly less serious, so if we could all pray for that for the OP then that’s the most we can do as members of CAF.
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AussieGirl19
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Thanks for the prayers. I really appreciate it. The whole epilepsy thing is causing me quite a bit of anxiety and I think I’m a little depressed, but I’m seeking help for that and trying to offer up my suffering to God
You can be assured of my prayers. If you’re feeling depressed I suggest you mention this to your doctor as well. Depression due to epilepsy can happen and your doctors will be able to advise you
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1ke
Guest
The Mods will often split a thread that has gone off topic into two, preserving the original so it can continue and starting a separate thread so the off topic conversation can continue,I bet you were a great hall monitor during your school days.
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