Face-to-face confession or confessional

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I went through RCIA last year. When I made my first confession, it was face to face and not in a confessional. Is this common practice now? My husband, who is Catholic, has not been to confession since they starting practicing face to face confession. He prefers the confessional.
 
I prefer being in a confessional and behind a screen, on my knees. At our parish it is the common method for confession - we still have our “old style” confessionals as well.

You must always have the option of having your confession be behind a screen. No one should ever be forced to have face to face confession if they do not choose that method.

~Liza
 
The confessional actually refers to the special room or booth, set aside in a Church for the purpose of hearing confessions.

Most confessionals will have a screen of some kind set up so that people can be anonymous if they wish, but will ALSO have a chair set up on the side where the priest sits so that you can sit facing him if you wish.

Does your priest just not use a confessional at all, and hear confessions in the open (the body of the Church or somewhere else?) Canon Law requires him to hear all confessions (whether face-to-face or behind a screen) in the confessional unless there’s good reason not to. It further requires that there MUST be a screen provided for anonymity in the confessional. Your husband could point these rules out to your priest.
 
We didn’t have a choice, that is how they did it at our parish…two chairs facing each other in an office. We have since moved to another state, and I have not seen a confessional at the parish so I am presuming they do face to face confessions as well.
 
pdsgirl said:
We didn’t have a choice, that is how they did it at our parish. We have since moved to another state, and I have not seen a confessional at he parish so I am presuming they do face to face confessions as well.
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Just because you haven’t seen it doesn’t mean it’s not there. Some are harder to find than others. Ask your priest about it. If necessary, suggest your husband ask around at other neighbouring parishes to see if they use a confessional.

Your husband has a right to go to confession in a confessional - it’s the priest who refuses to use a confessional who is in the wrong, in breach of canon law. So don’t take ‘this is the way we do things here’ as an answer, and stand up for him!

Talk to the priest first about it, then to the bishop if the priest won’t listen to you. You can take it further from there as well, but your husband has rights and should stand up for them.
 
Thanks LilyM. I appreciate your suggestion. I will look into it.🙂
 
pdsgirl said:
I went through RCIA last year. When I made my first confession, it was face to face and not in a confessional. Is this common practice now? My husband, who is Catholic, has not been to confession since they starting practicing face to face confession. He prefers the confessional.
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I think face-to-face confession is probably more common now than it was in the past as (for some reason) newer churches are being built without confessionals inside them.

This is a huge problem.

When I made my first Reconciliation, we had no choice to go to a confessional and I remember being far more nervous and upset that I should have been–worrying that the priest would for some reason break with the seal and tell my parents my sins or think differently of me (my family was very friendly with our parish’s priests). Of course in retrospect, I only now wish all I had to confess were the mere venial sins I probably confessed at my first Reconciliation but nonetheless, the fear and shame were real. That can keep people away from the sacrament and we don’t want that!

As for your husband, you should inquire on his behalf at your parish (or any of the other local parishes) as to when confessions are held. Usually, this is every Saturday afternoon. Often, the confessional is used (you can inquire on the phone) for these Saturday confessions.

I hope that helps clear things up. God bless.
 
passus said:
I think face-to-face confession is probably more common now than it was in the past as (for some reason) newer churches are for some reason being built without confessionals inside them.

This is a huge problem.
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Admittedly - having a church built without a confessional is a big barrier.

In such a case some temporary arrangement should be made come confession time, such as setting up some sort of arrangement of chairs/kneeler with a curtain between them in the vestry or something.
 
LilyM said:
In such a case some temporary arrangement should be made come confession time, such as setting up some sort of arrangement of chairs/kneeler with a curtain between them in the vestry or something.
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Well, I have been to churches before where there is a freestanding kneeler and a screen in front of it, with the priest sitting right on the other side.

Something like this…

 
In my parish we have both ways. On Saturdays confessions are in the the church in the confessional 4:00 to 5:15PM before the 5:30PM Saturday Vigil Mass. On one side is the “Traditional” way, the other side has a chair for the pentinent is sit down facing the priest. There is another time to confess and that is on Tuesdays from 6:00 to 8:00PM at the Parish Center in Father’s counseling room. Next to his office/ living quarters.

At first I was reluctant to try face to face, but I mustered the courage to try it and I still do it. Sometimes I do it the other way as well. I’m Catholic so why not try to do as much as what our Church has to offer us. Both forms are approved and historical as I shall briefly point out.

Confessing one’s sins face to face was the norm from Jesus’ time until the 16th century. Then they went to a separate compartment a box-like structure with a roof. What we still have in some churches.

Extra note: Until the Middle Ages the confessor sat between the altar and the communion rail with the penitent next to him.

Remember in times of war the Catholics soldiers and Chaplains do not usually have that luxury of an enclosed area for confession So, most of them are done face to face.

General rule with both forms is for the people waiting in line to stay far enough away so as not to overhear what is being confessed. If, one is doing the face to face get as close to Father as possible and if sitting in a chair lean down from the waist so you can whisper or talk in low tone. That will help prevent others from hearing.
 
PatrickJT914 said:
In my parish we have both ways. On Saturdays confessions are in the the church in the confessional 4:00 to 5:15PM before the 5:30PM Saturday Vigil Mass. On one side is the “Traditional” way, the other side has a chair for the pentinent is sit down facing the priest. There is another time to confess and that is on Tuesdays from 6:00 to 8:00PM at the Parish Center in Father’s counseling room. Next to his office/ living quarters.

At first I was reluctant to try face to face, but I mustered the courage to try it and I still do it. Sometimes I do it the other way as well. I’m Catholic so why not try to do as much as what our Church has to offer us. Both forms are approved and historical as I shall briefly point out.

Confessing one’s sins face to face was the norm from Jesus’ time until the 16th century. Then they went to a separate compartment a box-like structure with a roof. What we still have in some churches.

Extra note: Until the Middle Ages the confessor sat between the altar and the communion rail with the penitent next to him.

Remember in times of war the Catholics soldiers and Chaplains do not usually have that luxury of an enclosed area for confession So, most of them are done face to face.

General rule with both forms is for the people waiting in line to stay far enough away so as not to overhear what is being confessed. If, one is doing the face to face get as close to Father as possible and if sitting in a chair lean down from the waist so you can whisper or talk in low tone. That will help prevent others from hearing.
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I’ve seen some of those little boxy ones in our Cathedral (no longer in use) - man I would get SUCH claustrophobia using one of those! Mind you the confessional rooms they have now are pretty darn small as well.
 
I prefer anonymous.

The priest is in the place of Christ and it’s easier for me to think of it that way when I can’t see him.

That’s just me . . . 🤷 .
 
JMJ

The church I go to has the TLM so the confessionals are the good ol type, kneeling with the screen.

Sometimes, I will go to a church that has the NOM and you can choose, but I kneel whether seeing the priest or not.
 
LilyM said:
I’ve seen some of those little boxy ones in our Cathedral (no longer in use) - man I would get SUCH claustrophobia using one of those! Mind you the confessional rooms they have now are pretty darn small as well.
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Hi LilyM,

I don’t think about the lack of room in the confessional with either way. But now I might start to think about it. Let me say I’m sorry about your claustrophobia, I hope it doesn’t get too bad that it hinders your spiritual life.

Isn’t it great that we have a Church that allows for pastoral reasons options for the people of God. Sometimes one size does not fit all.
 
PatrickJT914 said:
Hi LilyM,

I don’t think about the lack of room in the confessional with either way. But now I might start to think about it. Let me say I’m sorry about your claustrophobia, I hope it doesn’t get too bad that it hinders your spiritual life.

Isn’t it great that we have a Church that allows for pastoral reasons options for the people of God. Sometimes one size does not fit all.
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Oh no it doesn’t hinder - it’s the least I can do to put up with a bit of discomfort to be absolved of my sins. Imagine the poor priests having to be in there sometimes for hours!
 
LilyM said:
Oh no it doesn’t hinder - it’s the least I can do to put up with a bit of discomfort to be absolved of my sins. Imagine the poor priests having to be in there sometimes for hours!
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Oh, that’s good to hear. Yes I can imagine the priest spending hours in the “BOX” (no disrespect intended) I beginning to think of solitary confinement in a prison. Hey, that’s a possible spiritual reflection situation. I have to think on that, because I can’t type and reflect at the same time. Maybe you, LilyM or others can see the quick reflection.

In my parish we have only one full time priest. We do sometimes have a couple of priests that help out from time to time.

Father does have once a week confessions in a much larger setting. (See my previous post.)
 
Found using the rocking search function…

Your Parish is required by Canon Law to offer confession behind the screen.

"Can. 964 §1 The proper place for hearing sacramental confessions is a church or oratory.

§2 As far as the confessional is concerned, norms are to be issued by the Episcopal Conference, with the proviso however that confessionals, which the faithful who so wish may freely use, are located in an open place, and fitted with a fixed grille between the penitent and the confessor.

§3 Except for a just reason, confessions are not to be heard elsewhere than in a confessional.

intratext.com/IXT/ENG0017/_P3E.HTM

"
 
kage_ar said:
Your Parish is required by Canon Law to offer confession behind the screen.
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That’s a good reference to have. My parish has four confessionals with separate entrances for open and closed confession…but the problem is that one of our priests refuses to use them and instead pulls two chairs out in front of the baptismal font and holds confession there.

I’ve never been that fond of open confession, but when there’s only one priest offering this sacrament at a time…I don’t really have a choice.

I guess it’s most frustrating knowing that this detracts from the number of people who go to confession (when our associate pastor hears confessions every once in a while in the confessional, there’s a line-up until right before Mass…but on the other nights, just a handful of people come).
 
For a long time, confession in my parish was only face to face, in either the reconciliation room, or in a conference room next door. When the new priest moved in, he put a portable screen in the room, so that one can enter through the door and go immediately to the right behind the screen without ever being seen, or go forward and a bit left and be opposite him, face to face. The first time I saw the screen, I told him it looked like Confessional by IKEA 🙂

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Penitent. . . . . . . . . . . Priest. . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Screen_____________
. . . . . . . . . . . . … . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Penitent. . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .Door. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

How’s that for a diagram? And I doubt the screen cost him more than $20, so it’s a good budget option.
 
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