Faith Wavering (and other problem)

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Soulstorm

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Hello I’d like to ask a few questions from the forum in hope of getting some Catholic thought on this. First I should mention that I don’t have really any close friends, and those I do like the most I probably still wouldn’t trust to stick around. I think one of the biggest reasons for this is that people nowadays are sinners who are completely aloof of their sin. I would never say I’m better than anyone else or holier, I have problems with self-respect that mostly stem from my failures in certain sins…That being said my first question is.

How do I shake the feeling that “I’m trying to believe in God because I want something that is morally perfect in my life.”? I realize that my morals are based off God’s laws but constant influence of atheists makes me start to think that maybe I am making God into just my perfect imaginary friend who won’t leave you or behave immorally like a real person would.

Second

What is a way to stop hating people in general? I’m rather non-confrontational in real life, when a group I hung around with in High School became too anti-christian in their dialogue I simply just stopped hanging with them even if it meant having to quit playing DnD with the group. However I do feel like all the aloofness to sin irritates me in a way that bottles up until I just feel like there is no good in the world and that it’d be better off if the good and the evil all died in one single event.

It’s this aloofness that makes it impossible for me to ever want to be close friends with anyone. I practically try to avoid learning any more than the bare bones of a person’s life. Otherwise something about them will be immoral, whether its premarital sex, them being an atheist/agnostic, or something else of that manner. I know one guy I consider a friend in college who seemed to have tried more than others to get to know me and do things with me, and I feel I’d lose something from that friend if suddenly he’d make an Anti-Catholic joke, say he was pro-choice, or even if he mentioned he was an atheist.

I realize I’m stirring around atheists, but honestly they cause the most confusion and suffering for my mind. They play mind games with their logic (and it is all a game to them, it doesn’t matter if you leave a conversation with your faith weakened because god doesn’t exist to them anyways) Either they’re militant about it or brush it off. Either way they seem to believe they are more rational and seemingly more intelligent than anyone who holds any theistic beliefs. Its that kind of snobbery that makes me most angry at people on a personal level.

Finally

**How do you all keep your faith alive, especially in the face of people using logic to tell you your worshiping a lie? ** I’m afraid right now I can’t give any personal examples, I think my loss of faith has been mostly the influence of thousands of internet atheists attacking with the same hundred responses against theism and religion that has warped my belief in God.

Right now I do believe God exists, the problem is I can’t prove it to myself so my faith remains more as a hope that God exists.
 
Are you in college right now? If so, I would join the Catholic Student Center–I think sometimes it is called the Newman Center. You need to be surrounded by people of your own faith, especially in the decadent world of college. If you are not in college, I would suggest becoming active in your Parish. Most Parishes have a young adult group for ages 18 to 35 or something like that. But let’s just say that you had a non-Catholic/non-Christian friend–and they were a great friend in every way except they were pro-choice. Unless they were active in the pro-choice movement or talked about their views frequently, I’d say it shouldn’t make a lot of difference in your relationship. In fact, the Lord may provide an opportunity for you to witness to that person about the sanctity of life. And you could pray for that person as well, that the Holy Spirit would show them the truth. But let’s say you have another friend, and they live a decadent life, partying every weekend, sleeping around, doing drugs, etc. That is a person you need to remove from your life, as they could potentially drag you down with them. We need to strike a balance between removing ourselves from the world completely (not good b/c we are called to love our neighbor and to save souls) and becoming involved with people who can harm us spiritually.
 
Yes I’m in college right now and their is a Newman center I could attend. Right now having to attend Confession is the thing that is scaring me away that and years of living in sin without Mass made me spiritually lazy.
 
God’s peace. I know how you feel about being surrounded by atheists, as for much of my life I was a biological scientist and teacher. I found that it was necessary to qualify any discussions with these people, since the majority have a conviction that their beliefs are the only logical conclusion–as you observed–and enjoy posing questions to you that they have no “skin” in. The way I did this was to ask them why they cared about my answer, since they wouldn’t believe it anyway. Only the truly sincere will press on much farther when they know you have “made” them.

The “proofs” that atheists want never involve faith. We are people of faith. Unless they are willing to accept the possibility of faith as reality, discussions will be worthless.

Don’t be too concerned about finding friends. I am 63, and I know less than 10 people that I consider to be truly friends. But my life is rich and far from lonely, and these true friends are jewels. Blessings, ~Br. Carlo~
 
Hey,
Praying for you! Just remember, God IS real and he does love you. It’s not just in your head. Maybe spend some quiet time reading the Psalms. Especially Psalm 23, 63 and 91. I find those really comforting.
God bless!
Sarah
 
Listen to Veronica and Br Carlo, those were excellent answers with a lot of wisdom.
Here is some wisdom from a teacher in the church about what to do in cases
where others do us injury and sometimes with good intent on their part.

St. Catherine of Siena in her book, Little Talks With God, reveals what God
told her.

“In the case of injuries done to you, judge that my will permits them in order to
prove virtue in you, and in my other servants. Esteem that one who acts in an
injurous manner does so as the instrument of my will. Such apparent sinners
may frequently have good intentions,…you should not judge in your mind, even
though externally it may be open, mortal sin.” <=====

…“Otherwise you fall into contempt of your neighbor, if you judge his evil will
towards you, instead of acknowledging my will acting in him.”

…“because the soul remains always in the love of its neighbor, the soul remains
always in mine, and thus remains united to me.”

This is one of the hardest teachings to understand and even more difficult to accept.
…to love God in everything that comes to us and to see it as a blessing, regardless
of what it is.

Just a difficult thought to bring a little help.​

“Blessed be the name of the Lord.” Job
 
Hey soulstorm,

I thought there was another post by you somewhere.

As far as others who are sinners. It is true, it can be very depressing to look around at all the sin going on. But the first Christians had to deal with this too as have Christians thorughout the ages. You said, they are aloof of their sin. And it’s true, most people have no idea what they are doing. So they are ignorant, like children essentially. We wouldn’t really get mad at or hate children for not knowing things that we know. In time we can come to have pity for them.

How do I shake the feeling that “I’m trying to believe in God because I want something that is morally perfect in my life.”? I realize that my morals are based off God’s laws but constant influence of atheists makes me start to think that maybe I am making God into just my perfect imaginary friend who won’t leave you or behave immorally like a real person would.

God is not just an imaginary friend. He is a real Personl, a pefect Person that is out there waiting for us, although we cant’ see Him. There are no perfect humans of course, except Mary. Many people, atheists included, think that God is a role model and they can’t get past the violence in the Old Testament. God is a role model, but he is more than that. He is a parent. And parents sometimes do things that their children neither understand nor agree with. But, when loving parents discipline their kids they do so out of love, so that their children will grow and mature.

That’s what God was doing in the Old Testament, moving humanity forward. Sometimes there was insurmountable evil that had to be ended. It seems we either get that or we don’t. We either trust God or not. Most atheists do not get that fact. They get all hung up about the destruction of unrepentant evil cultures which sacrificed their children to (gods, really demons)—but they can’t quite get themselves to have the same concern for the violence caused by institutional atheism (communism) in the 20th century. God’s violence was disciplinary, punishing evil, paving the way for the goodness of His plan for a culture based upon His laws which were instilled to bring order and holiness to the people. Atheist violence was based on anti-freedom and wanton cruelty. Kill those who don’t agree with our political philosophy.

It’s this aloofness that makes it impossible for me to ever want to be close friends with anyone. I practically try to avoid learning any more than the bare bones of a person’s life. Otherwise something about them will be immoral, whether its premarital sex, them being an atheist/agnostic, or something else of that manner. I know one guy I consider a friend in college who seemed to have tried more than others to get to know me and do things with me, and I feel I’d lose something from that friend if suddenly he’d make an Anti-Catholic joke, say he was pro-choice, or even if he mentioned he was an atheist.

I often feel this way too. There are people who I could’ve become friends with over the last several years but they are just too irreverant for me. They are nice people but I just decided that i don’t want that kind of influence in my life right now and so I didn’t pursue the relationship any further. I would feel a little guilty, like maybe I could be a good influence in their lives and evangelize them. But I just don’t have the ability to do that right now. I’m under no obligation to become friends with anyone. And It’s perfectly fine to want to be around those who share similar values as you and who can support you in your faith. My guess is that you’ll be able to find some people in the Catholic community where you are who do take the teachings of the Church very seriously and do not engage in pre-marital sex, etc…

cont…
 
cont…

I realize I’m stirring around atheists, but honestly they cause the most confusion and suffering for my mind. They play mind games with their logic (and it is all a game to them, it doesn’t matter if you leave a conversation with your faith weakened because god doesn’t exist to them anyways) Either they’re militant about it or brush it off. Either way they seem to believe they are more rational and seemingly more intelligent than anyone who holds any theistic beliefs. Its that kind of snobbery that makes me most angry at people on a personal level.

It is true. Atheist logic is often not very logical. For instance, they say—you have faith in God but I’m not dependent upon faith. NO, I’m sorry everyone proceeds on faith. The atheist has faith that the universe just “happened to pop into existence” The atheist has faith that Jesus of Nazareth was not telling the truth, that his followers were not telling the truth, that the New Testament is not really true, etc.

When I was a new Christian, in my zeal, I used to attempt to debate atheists. I would often come away with my head spinning. I didn’t have the patience or the charity to do it and I would often react in a hostile way. I realized that I wasn’t strong enough, either intellectually or emotionally or spiritually to attempt to do this, so I decided to pull back and not do that until I grew. In my opinion, you should not be engaging atheists in debate right now. I understand that you may in your frustration want them to see the truth of God and feel the pull to argue with them. But there’s a time for everything. Even missionaries take years of learning and growing before they go out into the world.

We have to get ourselves right first before we can begin to lead others to see the truth. It is said that grace builds on nature. It is true, God can transform us, but we have to do everything we can to get ourselves out of the way first. So in our case that means getting the natural order as solid as possible, building a solid foundation. Doing the work, figuring out what is going on in our psyches, Asking the questions–why do I react this way, what is it? Why am I thinking this way? How can I challenge my thoughts? My perception of the world?

A book that really helped me was the Road Less Travelled by Scott Peck. It’s all about building a solid psychological foundation for our spiritual life. It is an excellent book. One caveat–Peck was not an orthodox Christian and some things he says I didn’t agree with. But beyond that, it really is a solid wonderful book in getting us to see under the surface of our lives. I highly recommend it. You can get it cheap at Amazon!

So please, recognize your weakness and stop talking with atheists. Avoid them as much as you can right now. Someday you will be stronger and can debate them maybe, but not now.

Finally, something that helped me go to confession when I didn’t want to was remembering the spiritual battle that we are in. The devil wants to keep you away from the Lord in confession. He wants you to stay miserable in your sins and feel unworthy of God’s love and forgiveness. Realizing that made me mad and I wanted to fight back by humbling myself, enduring the temporary discomfort and going to the sacrament. Just write down your sins on a small sheet of paper, say a prayer for God’s mercy and help and walk into that confessional and do it. Get rid of the poison.

There are many good reasons for faith. In future posts I will share some more with you.

God Bless
 
Soulstorm, I’m sorry to say this but LIGHTEN UP!!! Here’s a picture of Mary to download on your desktop:

catholictradition.org/Mary/flowers2.jpg

I’ll respond tomorrow soulstorm as I’ve got a lot to say but I’ll be back. In the mean time, keep your faith by believing in Mary and ignore the utter ineptitude of atheists to make a valid argument against our faith. I’ve seen so many arguments and refuted so many after weeks of study its hilarious! Thanks be to Mary :).
 
I know where you are coming from. I don’t think a lot of the older people understand what the younger generations have to endure spiritually. Our faith is constantly getting attacked, and ridiculed.

However Soulstorm, you are right that there are reasons to why you would want to believe and God, but that doesn’t mean that that is why you believe and God. Just because it has benefits, doesn’t mean it’s not true.

I think you’ve reached a point in your life where it’s time to grow in your faith. You hope God exists, but there is a way that you can know God exists.

Earlier this year I reached the exact same point that you are at, and I read everything I could to help me. Finally I watched a video by Dr. William Lane Craig, where he talked about dealing with doubt. He said something very enlightening, that has literally changed my life.

He said “The way in which I know that Christianity is true, is on the witness of the Holy Spirit” (paraphrase).

I didn’t know what that meant. That phrase began my constant prayer. I prayed everyday and night for the testimony of the Holy Spirit. I didn’t know what it was, but since I knew if Gid existed, than he would answer. After all he said “Seek and you shall find, ask and it will be given to you, knock and it will be opened”, and God doesn’t lie.

I prayed and I prayed and I prayed, and finally on June 14, 2011, I finally knew what it meant. God answered me. He answered me in a way that made complete sense to me.

So my advise to you is to pray, and don’t cease. He will answer, it may be sooner or later, but he will answer at the exact time that he knows is best for you.
 
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