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This probably should’ve been posted in Moral Theology
I am a cradle Catholic, went to Catholic school all the way through uni and have intricately studied moral theology. However, I also have severe childhood trauma/PTSD, attachment, and mental health issues that are exacerbated by religion. As a result, I have “fallen away” from my Catholicism. I haven’t denounced anything or stop believing. Mostly just not “active.” Due to the nature of my trauma, the thought of practicing again, returning to Mass, or “God stuff” in general, makes me sick to my stomach. I pray that further along in my healing journey, I will be able to become active again. Until then, I am doing my best to stay true and avoid the pitfalls that usually happen to fallen away Catholics.
However, scrupulosity is one of my struggles (thanks, OCD) and I worry that I am doing something majorly wrong. That God is very angry with me for not practicing. (thanks, attachment issues) I don’t know how to love myself, AND God.
I am doing all kinds of intensive trauma therapies for PTSD, using my God-given discernment to steer clear of the dangerous ones. I do things such as visualization breathing, grounding for dissociation, yoga (stretching only!), body scanning (breathing into tense spots to ease chronic pain), inner child healing, telling my body/inner child I love her, affirmations like “my body can heal itself”…all things beneficial for complex trauma.
I do NOT do reiki, tarot, crystals or anything of that sort. I believe all healing comes from God. Shouldn’t have done it with my scruples issues, but I was reading how mindfulness shouldn’t be used by Catholic because it takes focus off God. My OCD got to me and I worry that focusing on myself in trauma therapy is wrong because it’s not focused on God. Surely God knows my struggles and that I’m doing my best this AND my mental health issues? It’s all about intention, right?
Kind of thinking out loud. Not really sure what I’m asking for exactly. I guess an intention for support in my journey.
I am a cradle Catholic, went to Catholic school all the way through uni and have intricately studied moral theology. However, I also have severe childhood trauma/PTSD, attachment, and mental health issues that are exacerbated by religion. As a result, I have “fallen away” from my Catholicism. I haven’t denounced anything or stop believing. Mostly just not “active.” Due to the nature of my trauma, the thought of practicing again, returning to Mass, or “God stuff” in general, makes me sick to my stomach. I pray that further along in my healing journey, I will be able to become active again. Until then, I am doing my best to stay true and avoid the pitfalls that usually happen to fallen away Catholics.
However, scrupulosity is one of my struggles (thanks, OCD) and I worry that I am doing something majorly wrong. That God is very angry with me for not practicing. (thanks, attachment issues) I don’t know how to love myself, AND God.
I am doing all kinds of intensive trauma therapies for PTSD, using my God-given discernment to steer clear of the dangerous ones. I do things such as visualization breathing, grounding for dissociation, yoga (stretching only!), body scanning (breathing into tense spots to ease chronic pain), inner child healing, telling my body/inner child I love her, affirmations like “my body can heal itself”…all things beneficial for complex trauma.
I do NOT do reiki, tarot, crystals or anything of that sort. I believe all healing comes from God. Shouldn’t have done it with my scruples issues, but I was reading how mindfulness shouldn’t be used by Catholic because it takes focus off God. My OCD got to me and I worry that focusing on myself in trauma therapy is wrong because it’s not focused on God. Surely God knows my struggles and that I’m doing my best this AND my mental health issues? It’s all about intention, right?
Kind of thinking out loud. Not really sure what I’m asking for exactly. I guess an intention for support in my journey.
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