Fallen away mom diagnosed terminal

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DaisymaeD

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Need some prayers, advice, suggestions for books or articles or websites, whatever.

Long story short, my family was profoundly dysfunctional and wounded, we’ve had an extended years-long estrangement and near silence (yes, I did reach out on several occasions), Mom left the church, now “living in sin” and diagnosed terminal. She did call me to tell me.

I’m scared to death. Her immortal soul is at stake. She has never listened to me in the past, and I’m afraid to be the one to push her away from Jesus even farther in her fragile state. Her significant other would NOT be happy to see her return to the church, and I don’t know who controls the finances, etc.

Help!!!
 
Pray for her. Love her. But dont preach. Just be there for her. But dont preach.
 
This is serious, ask a well-trusted and orthodox Priest! God bless, will pray!
 
“Mom, if you ever want me to contact a priest to come visit, let me know. You might get some comfort chatting with him”. It opens the door and plants the seed.

Pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet for her everyday. It is meant for the dieing especially. To have the knowledge that you are terminally ill is a great grace. It allows time for reflection and a chance to ‘make things right’ with whoever needs it. A time for putting things in order. This is part of God’s mercy that she has this time to prepare. I think it’s much kinder than having a car accident and dieing and never having the opportunity.

That might be something you could consider saying to her.

God bless you in this difficult time.
 
DaisymaeD said:
Need some prayers, advice, suggestions for books or articles or websites, whatever.

Long story short, my family was profoundly dysfunctional and wounded, we’ve had an extended years-long estrangement and near silence (yes, I did reach out on several occasions), Mom left the church, now “living in sin” and diagnosed terminal. She did call me to tell me.

I’m scared to death. Her immortal soul is at stake. She has never listened to me in the past, and I’m afraid to be the one to push her away from Jesus even farther in her fragile state. Her significant other would NOT be happy to see her return to the church, and I don’t know who controls the finances, etc.

Help!!!
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Praying for your mother’s health & recovery and to St. Michael the Archangel for her return to the church.
 
PennyinCanada said:
“Mom, if you ever want me to contact a priest to come visit, let me know. You might get some comfort chatting with him”. It opens the door and plants the seed.

Pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet for her everyday. It is meant for the dieing especially. To have the knowledge that you are terminally ill is a great grace. It allows time for reflection and a chance to ‘make things right’ with whoever needs it. A time for putting things in order. This is part of God’s mercy that she has this time to prepare. I think it’s much kinder than having a car accident and dieing and never having the opportunity.

That might be something you could consider saying to her.

God bless you in this difficult time.
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THIS! 👍
My MIL when diagnosed with lung CA refused all contact with Priests etc.(she ‘did Catholicism my way’ whatever THAT means!LOL!!)
My kids were devastated…but I told them they could pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet and they were rejuvenated by the fact that they could help their grandmother, even if she didn’t ‘get it’
 
I’ll say the Divine Mercy Chaplet for her and you, too! It’s good that you love her enough to ask for prayers for her… remember, NOTHING is impossible with God! And “when 2 or 3 are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them!” So, in Jesus’ name we pray!
 
If you are able to visit, try to bring some blessed salt or holy water and covertly go around and bless the house, on the inside, on the outside, where ever you can. Nothing has to be said to her. If you can pray prayers before you even get there, it can be done very subtly. 😉 Then when you call the power of God upon that house, you’ve helped prepare it.
 
Yes, do let her know you will call a priest for her any time she wants. Then pray for her and let her know you will be there for her in whatever way she needs you.

I have seen people who kept the church at arm’s length or more ask for the sacraments at the end, so you never know. When they know they are dieing, people begin to comtemplate eternity.

Call the local parish priest where she lives and let him know the situation and if/when she goes in the hospital try to arrange for a chaplain to visit her room. If she turns the priest away, so be it, but at least you have let the priest know she is there and is Catholic.

I am very sorry that you are going through this, I know it must be very stressful for you. Just remember, we always trust in the mercy of God in all situations.
 
Thank you all for your replies, it really helped me. I’ve even done a chaplet and I’m planning to incorporate it into my devotions!!!

My other family members are starting to lean on me for emotional support, and I’m feeling a little tired and depleted. Also, the whole fact that this crisis has happened in the context of a lot of unresolved family issues–I need to figure out how to balance my family’s needs with my own continuing to make peace with the past and continue with the path of forgiving my mom. (I would have been a lot more messed up if this happened 5 years ago!)

Anyhow, thank you all so much for your prayers and suggestions.
 
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