Falling in love with sponsor

[Ces280]

Okay my advice would be to find another sponsor. To see if you are mistaking devotion to him for sponsoring you for love. If it’s real then God bless you.

 

[Mannyfit75]

I don’t think you should change your sponsor. Just see where it will lead you. Consider it as an act of God’s will. We come to do his will anyways, not our will.

 

[Catherine_S]

I said I just didn’t feel ready to convert and this is a lonely journey for me, which it is. He is one of the few people that I can talk about it with and who understands me from both sides. We share the same Catholic and protestant friends. He sounded almost heart broken when I said I might put it on hold. He said I haven’t been there for you enough. I need to be there for you more. He apologized. He is working on some important work stuff for the next couple months 4 hrs away. But, he was planning on coming home for all my church stuff.
Anyways, I don’t know what to do.

*I hope that in some way ( if you can not tell this young man the truth) you manage to give him a reason for putting things on hold **that prevents him from accepting the responsibility for your decision. ***
*Sincerely ask yourself if this person had been attending the RCIA classes **would you have missed them. ***
Could you have asked for another sponser under the circumstances.
Is it not a good idea to catch up on these classes **you have missed. **
Could your friend have mentioned the priesthood to discourage any interest on your part in the direction you have taken this relationship.
Could he be in a process of decernment himself.
Prayer will help you to make the right decisions.
God bless you.

 

[Claire_from_DE]

Talk to whoever is in charge of RCIA. Get a sponsor who can be there with you each week, another Catholic friend or a member of the parish. Your first sponsor will still be your friend and, when he is around, you and he can talk about your faith journey. He can still be your sponsor at your Confirmation at Easter.

I’ve been part of the RCIA team in my parish for over 15 years. I’ve seen two cases where a person stopped coming to RCIA after breaking up with a boyfriend/girlfriend who was coming to the sessions with them.

IMHO you should continue with the RCIA process now if you feel God is calling you into His church. I have held make-up classes for people who have missed and usually more than one person has missed any given class so it isn’t just one on one.

 

[CreedalCatholic]

Is it possible that you see his attributes in his religious life direcly correlating with his profession (i.e. a uniformed and disciplined officer in the Air Force)?

My advice is to see a priest, get a sponsor of the same sex, and relate to your friend in dating (I wouldn’t allow any religious discussion to enter your dating while your going through RCIA.)

Now, you must realize there is nothing wrong to enjoy and be quite admirable of this man’s ability (a gift of God.)

I think you are looking at a potential spouse (not necessarily your spouse) and must realize the needed guidance of God and continue your journey in RCIA.

You should learn the Sacrament of Marriage while in RCIA. And, you shouldn’t get married or try to bring that out before you finish RCIA. Let everything fall in God’s time.

You can always enjoy a continued renewal of spiritual growth with this person later on in life.

Keep up RCIA and put your trust in God. Also, find an orthodox spiritual director (i.e. a priest) at this time. Try praying the Rosary. Don’t forget that Mary faced hardships. Or, you can the learn the Divine Chaplet of Mercy.

God bless.

 

[AHapka]

When I started training as a catechist, one of the first things we were told is that it is a bad idea, indeed, a very bad idea to have a sponsor of the opposite sex in adult RCIA cases, , except in the rare circumstance of it being the spouse.

How would you feel in the case of a fiance (who they are hopefully already in love with!)? Then it shouldn’t be as much of an issue…

I know it’s slightly different, but when I went through confirmation, my wife was my sponsor…I got confirmed only months before our wedding.

In my personal opinion, I think both you and Brother Rich make some good points. Perhaps since each sitution is different, it’s best for the Priest to advice the candidate and sponsor as I can see it not mattering in some cases and being a big deal in others.

In this particular case, I think asking the advice of a Priest whom the both of you know would perhaps be best. Those of us who have never met you or him just don’t know enough. My only other advice would be prayer and continuing in RCIA. Sometimes things are difficult in life because they are worth it and God wants to see if we will sacrifice a little for them.

Andy