False Evangelizing

[nickybr38]

To truly evangelize you have to TRULY care about people.

This isn’t a factory. We aren’t ‘dealing out’ salvation to those who want it.

This post is brought to you by the realization that the Evangelical and Jehovah Witness evangelists who tried to ‘convert’ me were treating me like a friend when they thought they had my ear but now avoid me at all costs since they realized I won’t be converting.

This is false concern. I find it mildly offensive and a little bit hurtful (because I thought I had friends but apparently not).

Don’t try to convert me unless you are genuinely concerned for me. Pretending to be my friend and then cutting me out when it’s clear I won’t change my religion is false and makes your faith look very, very bad.

Anyone else had to deal with false evangelists who were only interested in being ‘friends’ until it was clear you weren’t interested in changing your faith?

Personally I only invest in people if I genuinely care about them. My atheist, mormon, JW and agnostic friends are my friends now and they will continue to be my friends even though I am quite certain they will not convert. I don’t ‘fake’ friendship to try and force my beliefs on anyone.

 

[Nabooru]

I think that’s part of their tactics. Personally my friends know I want them to accept Christ more than anything else in the world, but I know I cannot force them. In that case it is best to evangelize by example.

 

[PJM]

=nickybr38;9798499]To truly evangelize you have to TRULY care about people.

This isn’t a factory. We aren’t ‘dealing out’ salvation to those who want it.

This post is brought to you by the realization that the Evangelical and Jehovah Witness evangelists who tried to ‘convert’ me were treating me like a friend when they thought they had my ear but now avoid me at all costs since they realized I won’t be converting.

This is false concern. I find it mildly offensive and a little bit hurtful (because I thought I had friends but apparently not).

Don’t try to convert me unless you are genuinely concerned for me. Pretending to be my friend and then cutting me out when it’s clear I won’t change my religion is false and makes your faith look very, very bad.

Anyone else had to deal with false evangelists who were only interested in being ‘friends’ until it was clear you weren’t interested in changing your faith?

Personally I only invest in people if I genuinely care about them. My atheist, mormon, JW and agnostic friends are my friends now and they will continue to be my friends even though I am quite certain they will not convert. I don’t ‘fake’ friendship to try and force my beliefs on anyone.

Hi Nicki

Forget NOT that “Faith” steming from God’s GRACE is a GIFT only HE OWNS and therefore something ONLY He; God can give out.

Our TAsk as Informed and FULLY practicing Catholics is too:

1. Know our faith [and I KNOW YOU KNOW IT]
2. To Live it fully and publically. Not showing oof; but being that light on the hillside.

Matthew 5:14 “You are the light of the world. A city seated on a mountain cannot be hid”

1. And WHEN GOD presents the opportunity to share it in Christy; fullness and truth.

God Bless my friend,

pat

 

[babs57]

They use Matt 10:14 “Whoever will not receive you or listen to your words-go outside that house or town and shake the dust from your feet.”

I have had this same experience. I for one, love a lively debate!

 

[mountee]

They use Matt 10:14 “Whoever will not receive you or listen to your words-go outside that house or town and shake the dust from your feet.”

I have had this same experience. I for one, love a lively debate!

You’re right, I completely forgot about that scripture and how it is used in these circumstances. Been there myself, it is difficult to lose friends this way. God bless you with new ones.

 

[OraLabora]

To truly evangelize you have to TRULY care about people.

This isn’t a factory. We aren’t ‘dealing out’ salvation to those who want it.

This post is brought to you by the realization that the Evangelical and Jehovah Witness evangelists who tried to ‘convert’ me were treating me like a friend when they thought they had my ear but now avoid me at all costs since they realized I won’t be converting.

This is false concern. I find it mildly offensive and a little bit hurtful (because I thought I had friends but apparently not).

Don’t try to convert me unless you are genuinely concerned for me. Pretending to be my friend and then cutting me out when it’s clear I won’t change my religion is false and makes your faith look very, very bad.

Anyone else had to deal with false evangelists who were only interested in being ‘friends’ until it was clear you weren’t interested in changing your faith?

Personally I only invest in people if I genuinely care about them. My atheist, mormon, JW and agnostic friends are my friends now and they will continue to be my friends even though I am quite certain they will not convert. I don’t ‘fake’ friendship to try and force my beliefs on anyone.

Evangelicals and JWs don’t evangelize. They proselytize. BIG difference!

Evangelization can be done without uttering a single word or exhortation.

 

[Nabooru]

And, remember - this is a tactic cults use to get members. They try to convince the target that they’re a true friend that can be confided in and trusted. Scientologists encourage potential members to “let it all out” - confess all their inner fears, frustrations, desires, and shames - and then use that information to manipulate that person. Be careful if someone in one of those organizations seems like they want to become your best friend right away.

 

[Koineman]

To truly evangelize you have to TRULY care about people.

This isn’t a factory. We aren’t ‘dealing out’ salvation to those who want it.

This post is brought to you by the realization that the Evangelical and Jehovah Witness evangelists who tried to ‘convert’ me were treating me like a friend when they thought they had my ear but now avoid me at all costs since they realized I won’t be converting.

I wrote a series of posts on my blog a while back about the sins often involved in friendship evangelism. I understand your concerns.

 

[clem456]

To truly evangelize you have to TRULY care about people.

This isn’t a factory. We aren’t ‘dealing out’ salvation to those who want it.

This post is brought to you by the realization that the Evangelical and Jehovah Witness evangelists who tried to ‘convert’ me were treating me like a friend when they thought they had my ear but now avoid me at all costs since they realized I won’t be converting.

This is false concern. I find it mildly offensive and a little bit hurtful (because I thought I had friends but apparently not).

Don’t try to convert me unless you are genuinely concerned for me. Pretending to be my friend and then cutting me out when it’s clear I won’t change my religion is false and makes your faith look very, very bad.

Anyone else had to deal with false evangelists who were only interested in being ‘friends’ until it was clear you weren’t interested in changing your faith?

Personally I only invest in people if I genuinely care about them. My atheist, mormon, JW and agnostic friends are my friends now and they will continue to be my friends even though I am quite certain they will not convert. I don’t ‘fake’ friendship to try and force my beliefs on anyone.

Happens all the time, the most common place being the family. Kids become adults and sometimes convert to different religions than the parents’. Do the parents continue to treat them with respect or do they cause a lifetime of grief by pridefully insisting on their faith? No one converts by force or coercion. This is pride masquerading as faith.

 

[nickybr38]

Happens all the time, the most common place being the family. Kids become adults and sometimes convert to different religions than the parents’. Do the parents continue to treat them with respect or do they cause a lifetime of grief by pridefully insisting on their faith? No one converts by force or coercion. This is pride masquerading as faith.

Amen. And it’s a very hurtful way to approach salvation and truth.

 

[LiseTravis]

You have my sympathies- :hug1: I find this practice to be extremely offensive. And it’s tragic when Christians use tactics like these that may actually turn people away from Christ.

 

[nickybr38]

You have my sympathies- :hug1: I find this practice to be extremely offensive. And it’s tragic when Christians use tactics like these that may actually turn people away from Christ.

I never had these tactics turned on me until I became Catholic. Now I’m running into ‘false friends’ all the time who stop being friendly when they realize I’m firm in my faith. Argh. So frustrating. I feel like I can’t trust non-Catholic Christians at this point… I just never know if they’re genuine or befriending me because they want to ‘save’ me. Is this how non-Christians feel when approached by Christians? Ugh.

 

[Mike_from_NJ]

nickybr38:

To truly evangelize you have to TRULY care about people.

This isn’t a factory. We aren’t ‘dealing out’ salvation to those who want it.

I can’t overstate how much I agree with the OP. I refer to it as religious scorekeeping, where people are treated as targets to add to some soul-saving scorecard instead of as human beings.

Now I’m not a believer but I was raised Catholic and have a large Catholic family. I appreciate when a believer (whether Catholic or not, christian or not) has a sincere desire and need to spread what they know to be the capital-t Truth.

I recently read an article on a general christian site which talked about ways to better evangelize. One of those ways was to be friendly with the person and once that initial barrier goes down to then bring up the faith. I know many times (especially back when I was living on a college campus) individuals would come up to me and feign interest in whatever I was doing, then wait until I seemed engaged with them. Then they’d strike and the topic became about what he really wanted to talk about.

I commented on that article telling the other readers not to trust it. Such tactics only serve to make the other party feel insignifcant. It says to that person that you don’t believe he or she is a sensible adult who can take what you want to discuss without being tricked into it. You can’t fake sincerity. I explained that when I’m evangelized to I make sure to be courteous – except when someone is being deceitful as they’ve outlined. At that point I afford them no courtesy, since clearly no courtesy was afforded to me.

 

[nickybr38]

I can’t overstate how much I agree with the OP. I refer to it as religious scorekeeping, where people are treated as targets to add to some soul-saving scorecard instead of as human beings.

Now I’m not a believer but I was raised Catholic and have a large Catholic family. I appreciate when a believer (whether Catholic or not, christian or not) has a sincere desire and need to spread what they know to be the capital-t Truth.

I recently read an article on a general christian site which talked about ways to better evangelize. One of those ways was to be friendly with the person and once that initial barrier goes down to then bring up the faith. I know many times (especially back when I was living on a college campus) individuals would come up to me and feign interest in whatever I was doing, then wait until I seemed engaged with them. Then they’d strike and the topic became about what he really wanted to talk about.

I commented on that article telling the other readers not to trust it. Such tactics only serve to make the other party feel insignifcant. It says to that person that you don’t believe he or she is a sensible adult who can take what you want to discuss without being tricked into it. You can’t fake sincerity. I explained that when I’m evangelized to I make sure to be courteous – except when someone is being deceitful as they’ve outlined. At that point I afford them no courtesy, since clearly no courtesy was afforded to me.

Isn’t it frustrating?

I mean, I’m Catholic so I am Christian but when these non-Catholic Christians come to me I no longer trust that they really want to be friends. Now in the back of my head I’m wondering if they’re only being nice because they want to ‘save me’.

People who use these tactics need to realize that the people they’re trying to ‘save’ aren’t ‘stupid’. We catch on pretty quick to the fact that we’re being used (in a way).

I have many atheist friends and I would LOVE for them to accept the ‘Truth’. But I am not friends with them so that I can be an example. I’m friends with them because they’re awesome people! And no matter if they accept my faith or not, I will always be friends with them.

 

[Nimeniton]

To truly evangelize you have to TRULY care about people.

Pretending to be my friend and then cutting me out when it’s clear I won’t change my religion is false and makes your faith look very, very bad.

:

I sympathise with your situation, having experienced similar myself. This response from evangelisers of whatever ilk is quite human and normal , even though it is disappointing and upsetting. My own experience is as follows:-

I was a “born a Catholic” and later converted to Buddhism. I was in both religions for over twenty years or so before I left them. On leaving them both, I discovered who my real friends were and they were few. The vast majority of people shun you as if you have some sort of contagious disease. For some people if you question their beliefs, you question them as people. As one protestant acquaintance once said to me, “if you reject my beliefs then you reject me”.

When I left Catholicism my own Catholic mother refused to speak to me for almost a year and was very angry. We do speak these days but even so she seeks to minimise the differences by saying things such as, “you are a Catholic just a lapsed one”. This is not true as I am apostate.

**Still it just goes to show that for many people friendship is difficult if there are profound differences in belief.**They may even see you as evil

“He that is not with me is against me” Matthew 12:30

or as divisive and to be shunned

“Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned”. Titus 3:10-11

So, your evangelisers may have saw themselves as warning you and you still refusing to heed them and so following the advice of scripture, they shun you.

There are some people who are capable of friendship despite big differences in belief systems. In my case they seem to have survived the test of time.

 

[nickybr38]

I sympathise with your situation, having experienced similar myself. This response from evangelisers of whatever ilk is quite human and normal , even though it is disappointing and upsetting. My own experience is as follows:-

I was a “born a Catholic” and later converted to Buddhism. I was in both religions for over twenty years or so before I left them. On leaving them both, I discovered who my real friends were and they were few. The vast majority of people shun you as if you have some sort of contagious disease. For some people if you question their beliefs, you question them as people. As one protestant acquaintance once said to me, “if you reject my beliefs then you reject me”.

When I left Catholicism my own Catholic mother refused to speak to me for almost a year and was very angry. We do speak these days but even so she seeks to minimise the differences by saying things such as, “you are a Catholic just a lapsed one”. This is not true as I am apostate.

**Still it just goes to show that for many people friendship is difficult if there are profound differences in belief.**They may even see you as evil

“He that is not with me is against me” Matthew 12:30

or as divisive and to be shunned

“Warn a divisive person once, and then warn them a second time. After that, have nothing to do with them. You may be sure that such people are warped and sinful; they are self-condemned”. Titus 3:10-11

So, your evangelisers may have saw themselves as warning you and you still refusing to heed them and so following the advice of scripture, they shun you.

There are some people who are capable of friendship despite big differences in belief systems. In my case they seem to have survived the test of time.

It’s hard for me to understand. I was raised with a mixture of friends. Buddhists, Wiccans, Atheists… I’ve never been the sort of person to reject someone because of what they believe or don’t believe.

Even now, as an on fire Catholic, my friends consist largely of Atheists, Agnostics and Protestants. I just don’t care if they believe what I believe. I like them for who they are, not what they believe. sigh

But I do get what you’re saying. I just don’t think it’s the best way to ‘evangelize’.

 

[Nimeniton]

Even now, as an on fire Catholic, my friends consist largely of Atheists, Agnostics and Protestants. I just don’t care if they believe what I believe. I like them for who they are, not what they believe. sigh

.

And all I can say is that I wish there were more like you:thumbsup: