Family welcomes 18th child...not the Duggars

[HouseArrest]

I realise there must be a big spread in ages, but that doesn’t mean that the older children don’t also need their parents. Not so much the 23 year old, but what about the teens? That is a very difficult time and I know that I needed my parents a lot when I was that age. But I just can’t see that mum & dad would be able to give much of their time to older ones when they’re so much tied up wit the little ones. I just can’t see how it would work on a practical day-to-day basis

I didn’t understand either - until God sent us 7 kids. I had no idea how one particular woman in our town did it with her 8 kids - the oldest in that family is 10 years older than my oldest - but now I get it! It all makes sense after you’re “there”. Maybe trust that it’s just something you don’t understand but possible. I could describe how I do things differently with my 7 kids that I didn’t do (and didn’t need to do) when I had only 2, but that would probably make for a boring read.

and I’m not sure how kind it is on these children (I am sure that each one is absolutely precious though of course).

I am not trying to be negative here, I am a pro-life Catholic and I love children but I don’t understand why it’s such a great virtue to have quite this many kids. It’s nowhere in the Catechism! In fact the Church says it is responsible to plan your family as long as you are using licit means. A smaller family can be just as Catholic and ‘open to life’ as one of these proportions.

Sure it can but God sent that family 18 kids, not a smaller family. Do you think maybe HE knows what He is doing?

Also I never said anything about it making a difference if they’re adopted, I think you must have misunderstood me.

 

[richardsgirl]

HouseArrest:
Hi Actually I would be really interested in hearing more about how you make it work with seven children… wow!

But I still think that the trusting God attitude can go too far (sorry I know how bad that sounds), for instance what if you are someone who is very high risk and could well die in childbirth? surely avoiding pregnancy would be a good idea? Also, there’s still a big difference between your seven children and this family’s 18… I just can’t get my head around that
After all there are only so many hours in the day, so much energy that anyone has, so it’s only logical that between 18 children each one will get less of these resources? Maybe that’s not even a bad thing but to me it sounds excessive and like it could cause problems for those children.

And children who grow up in big families are not necessarily happy… I really don’t mean to be offensive but it seems that some people on this forum are so convinced that bigger is better and almost look down on people for choosing not to do that. Maybe i’m wrong but that’s how it seems, and it’s nothing to do with being a good Catholic really, it’s just made to seem like that. Anyway that’s my opinion. Thanks for sharing what you said.

 

[MsOKing]

I think this large family is beautiful!

There are 20 immediate family members total; 2 parents and 18 children. This means that each individual person in this family has 19 people to love and 19 people to be loved by!

Parent-child love is incomparable joy and quintessential acceptance. It is devoted, caring, and unconditional. No other human love can substitute.

The fraternal love between siblings is precious, supportive, playful, individualized, and lifelong.

How many of us wish we were so fortunate to have 19 close nuclear family members to love and be loved by? Talk about quality interaction value!

Nineteen warm huggers, nineteen sweet kissers, nineteen smilers, nineteen coo-ers, nineteen lap holders, nineteen helpers, nineteen playmates, and nineteen pray-ers for the new baby!

I would most likely agree with you, but I can’t. I came from a family of 14, and it was HELL on Earth!

I know first hand that more is not always merrier.

Not all large families are wonderful, butterflies and roses. Not all smaller families are that either.

With that said…Hats off to the family…God be with them…

 

[Calliso]

To be honest I worry more about that woman’s health then I do about anything else. Having 18 pregnancies and birthes in 23 years has to be very hard on the body. That;s not a whole lot of time inbetween most pregnancies for her body to fully recover. Now sure she may not be showing obvious signs right now but that doesn;t mean things aren;t happening on the inside right now.

 

[HouseArrest]

Hi Actually I would be really interested in hearing more about how you make it work with seven children… wow!

But I still think that the trusting God attitude can go too far (sorry I know how bad that sounds), for instance what if you are someone who is very high risk and could well die in childbirth?

I think that is another topic altogether. We are talking about a high number of children and how someone can or cannot give each of them enough attention.

surely avoiding pregnancy would be a good idea? Also, there’s still a big difference between your seven children and this family’s 18… I just can’t get my head around that

I can’t get my head around it, either. But what I am saying is that I couldn’t get my head around 7, either, until I had them. Now I can get my head around it. If I had 18 I think I’d be able to get my head around it then. I am assuming that it’s just something that I don’t know, don’t need to know, and won’t assume it can’t be done just because I don’t know how to do it. Ben Carson can heal people that have no hope. I cannot imagine how. But that’s because it’s not my job.

After all there are only so many hours in the day, so much energy that anyone has, so it’s only logical that between 18 children each one will get less of these resources?

**There is a whole lot about raising children that is not logical. Do you have children? **

Maybe that’s not even a bad thing but to me it sounds excessive and like it could cause problems for those children.

And children who grow up in big families are not necessarily happy…

And children who grow up in small families are not necessarily happy. Some people will do a bad job with two, and some people will do a bad job with 18.

I really don’t mean to be offensive but it seems that some people on this forum are so convinced that bigger is better and almost look down on people for choosing not to do that. Maybe i’m wrong but that’s how it seems, and it’s nothing to do with being a good Catholic really, it’s just made to seem like that. Anyway that’s my opinion. Thanks for sharing what you said.

I don’t think you are being offensive. I think that in a lot of threads people confuse advice to be “open to life” with “have a lot of kids”, and that’s not the same thing. But again this is another issue. The only thing I was saying before is that just because you don’t know how something can possibly be done, doesn’t mean it can’t be.