K
k5thbeatle
Guest
Heard a wonderful talk given by an older priest regarding why many kids leave the Church once they grow up. Of course I’m paraphrasing him because it’s all from memory but here’s basically what he said;
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I find it sad that more often than I’d like to admit I meet with or hear from people who are distraught because they learn that their children (or grandchildren) have left the Catholic Church. Or sometimes I’ll inquire how their son or daughter is doing and they’ll tell me they have left and sheepishly shrug their shoulders as to why they left the Church? The typical question I hear is, “Where did we go wrong?”
But instead of answering this I’ll ask some questions of my own. So let me ask you; when your kids were little did you involve them with childrens’ stories of the bible and gospel readings? As they got older and were better able to understand, did you ever discuss the Sunday readings with them maybe even just on the drive home? What about the homily, did you ever discuss this as a family? Did you yourself show interest in the Mass by fully participating in the responses and songs or did you just stand idly by or worse show signs of impatience and disinterest yourself like looking at your watch or cell phone? Did you ever fold your hands in prayer during Mass as an example for your children? And as your children grew out of infancy did you wean them off bringing play things and food/snacks as a means of distraction and behaving during mass? Did you make prayer and family prayer at home a regular event? During mass do you start looking for your keys and putting on your jackets before or even during the final blessing? What about staying for the entire Mass? Do you regularly leave early or even right after communion? At what age do you ask your children to maybe listen to the words being spoken during Mass or do you ever ask your children this? What did you tell your children when they were young about going to Mass, that you do because you “have to”? What did you tell your kids about communion when they were small or did you even discuss this?
To engage a child you have to be engaged yourself. If you yourself were not setting an example is it really any surprise that a child when he/she grows up and experiences the “world” decides to leave? Or when they move into environments that are anti-religious is it any wonder with no real foundation that they are convinced to leave the Church? *
I’m sorry for the kind of unorganized way I wrote this as again it was from memory but it was such a powerful message the way he spoke and talked that I wanted to share it here. Indeed we all are living examples for our children. What we say and how we act is picked up by kids and serves as a foundation for them. If we ourselves are disinterested in the Catholic faith is it any wonder that our children would grow up with the same disinterest?
*
I find it sad that more often than I’d like to admit I meet with or hear from people who are distraught because they learn that their children (or grandchildren) have left the Catholic Church. Or sometimes I’ll inquire how their son or daughter is doing and they’ll tell me they have left and sheepishly shrug their shoulders as to why they left the Church? The typical question I hear is, “Where did we go wrong?”
But instead of answering this I’ll ask some questions of my own. So let me ask you; when your kids were little did you involve them with childrens’ stories of the bible and gospel readings? As they got older and were better able to understand, did you ever discuss the Sunday readings with them maybe even just on the drive home? What about the homily, did you ever discuss this as a family? Did you yourself show interest in the Mass by fully participating in the responses and songs or did you just stand idly by or worse show signs of impatience and disinterest yourself like looking at your watch or cell phone? Did you ever fold your hands in prayer during Mass as an example for your children? And as your children grew out of infancy did you wean them off bringing play things and food/snacks as a means of distraction and behaving during mass? Did you make prayer and family prayer at home a regular event? During mass do you start looking for your keys and putting on your jackets before or even during the final blessing? What about staying for the entire Mass? Do you regularly leave early or even right after communion? At what age do you ask your children to maybe listen to the words being spoken during Mass or do you ever ask your children this? What did you tell your children when they were young about going to Mass, that you do because you “have to”? What did you tell your kids about communion when they were small or did you even discuss this?
To engage a child you have to be engaged yourself. If you yourself were not setting an example is it really any surprise that a child when he/she grows up and experiences the “world” decides to leave? Or when they move into environments that are anti-religious is it any wonder with no real foundation that they are convinced to leave the Church? *
I’m sorry for the kind of unorganized way I wrote this as again it was from memory but it was such a powerful message the way he spoke and talked that I wanted to share it here. Indeed we all are living examples for our children. What we say and how we act is picked up by kids and serves as a foundation for them. If we ourselves are disinterested in the Catholic faith is it any wonder that our children would grow up with the same disinterest?