Father's Day and some advice

[TOBaddict]

Pray for all of those struggling through Father’s day this year. This “celebration” day can be painful for many.

For me, I don’t know what to do. I am about to go no contact with my toxic family. My father was/is physically abusive to me. Then, when there was a situation where the police had to be involved and I told them what happened, he confronted me afterwards that I shouldn’t have told the police. He apparently did it “gently.” So, the pain I was in for three days, the emotional trauma, and how I was curled up in a ball sobbing and shaking was “all in my head.” Not only did he abuse me and was not at all sorry, he didn’t even want to acknowledge it. He thought he could gaslight me and get away with his wrongdoing, while also disregarding any thought for me.

I feel that I shouldn’t even send him a card this year. But I’m stuck between this and “honoring my father.” I would appreciate some advice.

 

[Isca]

How awful for you, I am so sorry. I can see why you are severing ties.

As for the card - if you do send one, just get a blank art card with no words in it and just write a message that you hope he’s well, or something along those lines. It would be disingenuous to send a Happy Father’s Day card with all the sentiments that they usually contain.

However, I think you should do what makes you feel the most comfortable - if that’s no card, so be it.

 

[KildareBrigid]

If your father is abusive, you are not dishonoring them by cutting off contact. You need to protect yourself. I will pray for you!!

 

[UpUpAndAway]

Remembering you, your father and your intention in my daily prayers. God bless.

 

[MaryT777]

If your father is abusive, you are not dishonoring them by cutting off contact. You need to protect yourself. I will pray for you!!

I agree with this, and I will also pray for you to be healed from the hurt of this relationship.

Mary.

 

[phil_at_dayboro]

You owe your Father nothing , he intends to give you nothing ,

Start your own life , Be your own man ,
You need to Self Analyse your life , and make a Conscious dissission that you will never become as your father, you can’t do that while living in his shadow …
I hope you have had a good education , because it will be hard for you to do this,
The thing is , with Jesus on your side, you can achieve almost anything ,
Move far away , then join a new Parish with a vigorous passion,
There is an old Scottish saying , wipe your boots as you leave the door and start afresh

 

[mommy_k]

Praying for you and your father…
Hail Mary,
Full of grace,
The Lord is with Thee
Blessed art Thou amongst women
And blessed is the fruit of Thy womb
Jesus
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
Pray for us sinners,
Now and at the hour of death,
Amen

 

[tawny]

Praying with all for all. Praying for your intentions.

 

[Neofight]

On Fathers Day, honor your earthly father by honoring your heavenly Father by offering prayers of mercy and forgiveness by the almighty for him.

Through prayer, you can do something for someone without the physical danger of contact. Or the mental anguish of direct communication.

I’m praying for you.

 

[pollylodges]

Saint Michael, the archangel, defend us in battle, be our defense against the wickedness and snares of the devil, may God rebuke him, we humbly pray. And do you, O’ Prince of the Heavenly host, by the power of God thrust into Hell Satan and all the other evil spirits who prowl about the world for the ruin of souls.

Amen.

†

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

†

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

†

 

[wild_thing]

You don’t need to maintain contact with your father whatsoever. Focus on healing and a good relationship with our Father in heaven. Praying for you…

 

[njlisa]

You don’t need to maintain contact with your father whatsoever. Focus on healing and a good relationship with our Father in heaven. Praying for you…

 

[acadiANNA]

Do the right thing. God will judge you on what you do. I would send a card just like Isca said. Make sure you say you are praying for him or simply say God bless you. You may even find a printed one that is appropriate. You can still keep a safe distance. My father was a terror growing up. I continued to pray for him and his return to church. When he was 54, he began going to church. My prayers were answered. We had the most wonderful years after that for which I thank God. I cared for him in our home for 6 years following his stroke until he passed away at age 88. We had a loving father/daughter relationship. I never gave up on him and kept praying. Praying for you to examine your conscience and decide what is best for you to do.